"It Feels So GOOD To Be A Hero..." COMICS! Sometimes They Are Too Good!

The Church of Howard Victor Chaykin (as named by Corey of The Ottowan Empire) is now in session. Now bend your knees and bow your heads…oh, you have such filthy minds. Shame on you. Photobucket

As is customary many ill-judged words will now follow…

MIDNIGHT MEN Story and art by Howard Victor Chaykin Colouring by Tom Vincent Lettering by John Workman, Jim Novak (Epic Comics/Heavy Hitters/Marvel, $1.95ea, 1993)

Handsome Jewish schmuck Barnett Pasternak returns to L.A. to attend the funeral of his father. But Barnett’s father died no ordinary death – his thyroid was removed! And L.A. is no ordinary city - protected as it is by a seemingly ageless protector who to the wider world remains an urban legend. In short order Barnett finds himself reunited with an old flame, an accessory to murder, on the outs with ex-KGB in cahoots with a Hollywood Player who just might hold the key to his father’s death and all the while Barnett Pasternak is unknowingly on a collision course with his Destiny. Barnett Pasternak is about to discover that you should never mistake honour for weakness and that you can’t kill…THE MIDNIGHT MEN!

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For the sake of everyone’s sanity Howard Victor Chaykin shall, mostly, be referred to throughout as HVC. Although it strikes me now that that sounds like some kind of Home Shopping Channel. One that specialises in marital aids and Mai-Tai mix, maybe. Oh, well too late now. HVC it is.

Here’s a couple of facts before we even crack the covers of these beauties:

Fact One: MIDNIGHT MEN is © Howard Chaykin, so it ain't work for hire. I believe all the original titles released under the Heavy Hitters banner from Epic (Marvel) were creator owned. Imagine that. And it wasn't some kind of sop to creators already working at Marvel where they could pursue more personal and ambitious works (i.e. TV pitches). No, MIDNIGHT MEN was published by Marvel but is owned by Howard Chaykin. That’s because HVC is many things but one thing he isn’t is daft enough to end his days rooting through bins like some kind of rakish urban fox.

Fact Two: This may not actually be a fact but the way I understand it is that MIDNIGHT MEN is a retooling of HVC’s original pitch to DC when they decided they were going to mess up Batman big time. HVC didn't get the gig as it seems DC probably weren't really receptive to the idea of Batman dying as a result of an alcohol enabled intersection with a broken flag pole. So they went with the whole spinal injury/crack addict wrestler thing. The success of that would lead to a string of such bloat as BRUCE WAYNE: COCKKNOCKER! and GOTHAM: POOR ROAD SURFACE MAINTENANCE! Events have continued to emit from The Big Two with such decreasing returns that by this stage such events enhance the North American genre comics scene in the same way that injecting chicken meat with water enhances that particular product. Tasty!

It’s a mark of how far Events have lost the plot (and the pacing, characterisation, etc.) that I look back on KNIGHTFALL with a certain level of fondness. As indeed in all probability do DC. This year their Big Thing (i.e. short term sales spike!) looks like being, maybe, WATCHMEN 2. Crack those bones, there’s marrow inside! It’s okay though, comics are saved because Marvel have got AVENGERS Vs. X-MEN. This is a series which will take a bus load of men to produce a story of two groups of people with magic powers hitting each other for REASONS! So special, sophisticated, insightful and nuanced will this prove to be that all the fight scenes are actually going to be in another series. Yes, DC and Marvel are going to save comics by pretty much acting like they are trying to help someone whose hair is on fire by stamping on their head. I guess these series could be great, I guess that could happen. I guess the audience might not react exactly as they have every time one of these things has ended i.e. like James Spader on the grass verge at the end of Cronenberg’s CRASH: “Maybe the next time, Darling. Maybe the next time.” Sweet Mercy, I am now actually more jaded than James Spader in CRASH. A big round of applause for mainstream North American genre comics, people! Time to put those pennies on your eyes, Big Two! Going on a boat trip! In fact the best result of KNIGHTFALL is that MIDNIGHT MEN exists. I suppose I should stop mouthing off like a jackass and talk about that now.

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The biggest problem with MIDNIGHT MEN is that it is a HVC comic. This means that people who don’t like HVC comics won’t like it (it is very HVC) but that’s their loss. For people who like HVC comics the fact that it is very much a HVC comic is also a problem. Because this means it is incredibly slick with every one of the elements under the author’s control working to the sweet end of entertaining the audience. It is so good at doing this that it is easy to overlook how clever it is. It’s ultimately too good for its own good.

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By 1993 HVC had pretty much nailed down all the techniques that worked in order for him to produce a quality piece of work. Following his development through the stumbles and mis-steps of the ‘70s through to his glorious moment(s) of clarity in the ‘80s and ‘90s with AMERICAN FLAGG!, BLACKHAWK, TIME2, BLACK KISS and MIDNIGHT MEN it's clear that with AMERICAN FLAGG! he finally consolidated all his (hard) work and learning to create a new comics grammar and that everything after represented honing. By MIDNIGHT MEN his comics “voice” is so fluent and captivating it’s easy to miss what he’s saying and how well he's saying it.

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A lot of what HVC is saying in MIDNIGHT MEN is what HVC is often saying in his comics. Foremost is the fact that in a HVC comic it would be totally dreamy to be HVC. (I imagine it ain't too shabby being HVC in real life either.) All HVC’s heroes are HVC to some extent or other. If you had all his characters team-up in one book not only would I soil my pants with glee but it would also resemble THE SAILOR ON THE SEAS OF FATE but with louche chiseled jawed Jews being witty and quick with their fists and good with the ladies. So, yes, Barnett Pasternak is a HVC hero. And like all HVC’s latter day heroes he follows the usual HVC character path.

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This recurring character development lurking in HVC’s work can clearly be identified as originating in the phrase “overcame a youthful attitude problem”. Now this phrase occurs often in HVC’s blurbs and interviews. It really does, you can take my word as I’m sure you've got better things to do than check. That porn don’t watch itself, kids! Clearly HVC reached a point in his life when (Jewish literary reference ahoy!) something happened. I don’t know what all but whatever it was HVC clearly thinks that at one point he was a schmuck and then he was a mensch and ever since he’s felt glad all over. Which is precisely what happens to Barnett Pasternak. Although I imagine the real biographical details don’t involve HVC donning the mantle of an urban legend vigilante who lost his life saving him. But then who knows what HVC does at the weekend? (Ladies do!) MIDNIGHT MEN is the story of Barnett Pasternak (HVC?) learning to man up and develop some moral balls. If I were a blunt man I’d say that HVC feels that it’s a crucial part in becoming an adult to stop wanking and start fucking. Ethically speaking, of course. Aren’t you glad I’m not a blunt man.

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Usually this Hero’s Journey is contrasted with a Villain who has failed to make this course correction. Here we have Noble Youngblood and he is what is known in the Chaykinverse as a Moral Cripple. It’s a pretty self explanatory term, I feel. Now all the hoo-ha in MIDNIGHT MEN is caused by Youngblood’s desire to get his hands on an anti-aging formula. The only problem is that for it to work it requires thyroid glands and the natural habitat of the thyroid gland is the human being. Luckily Youngblood can get round this by having his ex-KGB chums harvest them from the worthless. To people like Youngblood anyone who isn’t as rich or powerful as him is worthless (because they didn't try hard enough, they weren't hungry enough probably.) For, as we all know, being poor and fucked up is obviously a conscious choice. The fact that Youngblood is an ex-movie star is another Chaykin favourite, for HVC never tires of pointing out the differences between the heroes on the silver screen and the failings of the individuals portraying them (even today; see the John Wayne comments by Nick Fury in AVENGERS 1959). Humour is always present in a HVC book and the stuff outlined in the previous sentences make the fact that Youngblood is killing people who won’t contribute as much as he will to the world a real yucker. C’mon you might take a bullet for the guy working on a cancer cure but Robert Pattinson can invest in his own damned bullet proof jacket. I get the impression the fact that such importance is placed on an anti-aging formula is also amusing to HVC. Finally in possession of the formula Pasternak solves the humongous moral quandary it presents by just eating it. I like to believe HVC believes that it isn't how long you live but how big you live that matters. Mind you, I also like to believe you are still reading this far in despite the paltry return on the investment of your attention.

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HVC does add a new wrinkle with his emphasis on sons and fathers. It isn't often a HVC hero weeps so I think the fact that this one does is notable. And who does he weep for? His father. Pasternak is initially involved via the death of his father, a career criminal who we are led to believe was a better criminal than he was a father. Youngblood has an illegitimate son who is a tubby fucknut. HVC’s not too interested in the fathering part of the equation though it’s probable that the scenes in which Youngblood verbally and physically abuses his nutty son shouldn't be taken as examples of How To Bring Up A Kid. Unless you are a shithead. I’d say it seems like these fathers have failed as men but that doesn't mean their kids have to. And in the end one of them doesn't. I guess HVC is saying, if you’re an asshole it might not be your Dad’s fault you’re an asshole? Maybe. I guess MIDNIGHT MEN is the old Nature vs Nurture debate but with better dressed people doing more exciting things than anyone in my Sociology classes ever did. Although I was pretty dapper truth be told. It’s a shame for my endless need to put meaning where there is none that it was some years after this series that HVC discovered he was in fact adopted (your ChaykinFact for the day! No charge!). That’s right, Abhay fans, EVERYTHING HOWARD VICTOR CHAYKIN KNEW ABOUT HIS DAD WAS WRONG!

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Visually MIDNIGHT MEN looks like a HVC comic but the familiarity of the elements does tend to obscure the fact that it isn't repetition it’s refinement. In the first issue HVC kicks off with a first page that incorporates photographs and silent movies.  Static pictures and moving pictures presented on the immobile page. But you still know which part is the moving picture. It’s easy to miss that it's very clever. The same issue sees HVC splash out on two pages of 4x3 grids to illustrate a safecracking which reveals much about the three characters present, is convincing in its safe crackery details and has time to include a fat man’s hand inadvertently touching a statue’s penis. Throughout the series there’s also a recurring vertical panel layout tracking the motion of a body through the panels. This striking and effective visual also foreshadows the final act in which Pasternak’s ethical nuts swell and provides contrast with the scene in which Pasternak meets and kind-of kills the man whose role he will ultimately fill. It’s great stuff and it’s HVC all the way. It’s never a one man show though and John Workman and Jim Novak’s sound FX are great throughout ( particularly when suggesting the aural smog of traffic) despite the multiple fonts and creative placing they never jar the attention and only serve to accentuate the reading experience. When I read MIDNIGHT MEN I just enjoyed it but when I flicked through it and looked at the pages in isolation I realized what a great service HVC had done the reader. Visually it is an eminently subtle work and rewards close examination on a technical level but is so good at its job that it stops the reader realising how good at its job it is. Which is a mistake people often make with HVC himself I feel.

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So, MIDNIGHT MEN is every bit as good as all the good HVC comics but not quite as good as the best. Which makes MIDNIGHT MEN, for me, GOOD!

CHAYKINMANIAC NOTE: This series remains uncollected despite DYNAMITE threatening to do so.

 

I thank you for your attentions.

Have a smashing weekend with some COMICS!

 

NEXT TIME: Not Howard Victor Chaykin! Not War Comics! (Unless I have to fall back on those, otherwise my word is my bond!)

Wait, What? Ep. 71: Funk, Soul, Brother

Photobucket Yep, a bit of a delay but here we are, more or less as promised: Wait, What? Ep. 71, featuring our new theme song courtesy of the hyper-talented Graeme McMillan. This done-in-one episode is not quite two hours and forty-five minutes and covers, um, lots of stuff.

Stuff like OMAC and the other cancelled new52 titles; the current state of George Perez's career and what Marvel's marketing team could do with it; Mark Millar's Trouble and Spider-Man; comments by Charles Vess and Ariel Olivetti about Marvel; Mark Waid's Amazing Spider-Man/Daredevil crossover, Jason Aaron's Wolverine and the X-Men as well as Wolverine #300.

Plus, a lot of babbling from Jeff about PunisherMAX #21; a debate how many "good" issues a creator might have in them; Secret Avengers, Astonishing X-Men, Warren Ellis, and in-canon behavior; James Robinson and Shade; the preview issue of Shonen Jump Alpha; and Marvel Two-in-One vol. 4.

See? Worth the wait. (Probably.)

We would like to think it is on iTunes, but we are all but certain you can listen to it here, thanks to the handy link below:

Wait, What? Ep. 71: Funk, Soul, Brother

As always, we thank you for listening and hope you enjoy!

Hibbs remembers reviews, sure, faintly

I feel fairly awful because I really didn't want to post anything anywhere on SOPA-protest day, but I also really really want to tell you about a comic I truly enjoyed, and since I've been so crappy in saying anything about any comic for the last few weeks (seriously, mid-November through to February is terrible for me because I'm so stupidly busy at the whole "owning your own retail business" thing from the holidays and year-end work), if I don't write it today, I don't write it at all this week. So, join me below the jump?

JUSTICE LEAGUE #5: After what I thought was a really weak start, I think each issue of JL has gotten better than the last, and this issue is... is... er, is not here?

I feel like one of those cartoons where someone get's so mad that their head transforms into an old-timey whistle, and steam flies out of their ears.

My first point of frustration is that this is THE best-selling DCnu title, and the one that DC should be going to measures up to and including sending the marketing team to individually hand-deliver copies to stores if needed. If one of the already-cancelled books like MISTER TERRIFIC ships a week late, "it doesn't matter", but JL #5 would have been my single number one dollar item of the week, and is a large traffic driver.

Second, it makes me a liar, even indirectly -- I've really been stressing to local consumers that DC books now have ACTUAL ship weeks these days, I had to explain a lot right during the 5th week hole. And this claim was especially repeated with JL (and it's funky start pattern) -- "JUSTICE LEAGUE *IS* a third week book!". Except now it's not.

Third, it totally screws up FOC, which are placed 3 weeks before print date, and thus is meant to give us the first week sales patterns on books before we order the next one. Now we'll have to order #6 without that information. That's very very messed up.

Fourth, DC HAS NOT SAID ANYTHING through established communication channels. Well, unless you count those bullshit tweets insisting the book was shipping on time, despite not being on anyone's invoice, which were then retracted. They certainly didn't bother to tell any retailer in any official way (I'm looking at the last two weeks of DIRECT CHANNEL [DC's retailer newsletter], and the best they did was to slide the new shipdate into a story about JL#1 getting a sixth printing), nor is there anything out there for consumers either on the Source, or on any of the "major news sites". Where is the explanation, where is the apology?

Fifth, of course it has to happen with on the book by the Chief Creative Officer, and the Co-Publisher -- two people who probably can not be removed from the book or even penalized in any way. Way to provide the best possible example.

(And if you're one of those darling little apologists who want to bray "give Jim Lee a break, he just had a baby", let me point you to Jim's tweet on 12/27 [how the hell do you find a permalink from Twitter?!?!?] that says "Introing our newest creation-River Charlotte Lee!7.10# She waited til my deadline was done! Mom @joke2far doing great http://pic.twitter.com/iZQHe85y" which would indicate to me, at least, the birth did NOT interfere.)

(Congrats on the birth, by the way, Jim -- children are a blessing, and I hope River has a long and wonderful life!)

Clearly, life will go on, and the sun will rise, despite comic books being late, but I'm pretty appalled they couldn't even make it a full year before they blew it. And on this book, of all books.

*sigh*

 

 

And for the comic that actually arrived...

PROPHET #21:  Wowsers, I haven't read such a good debut in a very long time. It's very Heavy Metal Sans Titties -- maybe "Conan meets Ringworld"? And it's smart, and world buildy, and challenging, and yet totally action-packed and forward-sprinting. I haven't liked a comic as much as this one since XOMBI #1, and, unlike that one, the sales threshold is unlikely to cancel it by #6 (I hope at least!)

The bad news is that the West Coast (I think.. at least three stores in California...) got allocated to 90% of their orders, and I don't see the balance on next week's invoice, so you might have to wait until your store gets the (already announced) second printing -- I've got twice my initials coming as a reorder next week (though how those all fill when I'm *not* getting the balance due of my allocation is a wonderful Mystery of Diamond Comics) -- but this is a comic that you VERY much want.

It's EXCELLENT!

 

As always, what do you think?

 

-B

 

Wait, What?: D to L-A-Y'd

Photobucket First, hear me now and listen to me later: when comics come out tomorrow, go get yourself a copy of PROPHET #21.  It does this amazing thing I feel like very few comics do:  it makes me feel like I'm reading real science fiction, and it makes me enjoy it.  It also feels like "classic" Heavy Metal with a very different vibe.  No rampant baring of the boobs, no nonsensical plotting, but there's that thorough sense of the surreal, where the most insane things are taken for granted and each insane thing is actually outdone by an even-more-insane thing a page (or even a half-page!) later.  It's not the be-all and end-all--the characters are stoic, the plot is obscured so it's not something you're going to mistake for Star Wars, but it's still closer to Episode 4 than, I dunno, Asimov's Foundation Trilogy--but god damn, is it a pretty fun comic.  Brandon Graham and Simon Ray did great work on this.  You should get.

Second, Wait, What?, as the post title subtly suggests, is gonna be late this week.  My work schedule changed around so I could cover the holiday yesterday and I would prefer not to post any content on SOPA/PIPA blackout day tomorrow...and I doubt I'm gonna get this sucker mixed in time today (although, hey, stranger things have happened).  So tune in on Thursday for Episode 71: it won't have waffle talk, but it will have our brand spanking-new theme song as composed by Mr. Graeme McMillan and I think you'll quite like it!

Arriving 1/18/2012

Without a doubt, the book of the week is PROPHET #21 -- I'll be sold out by Thursday (but I've got a double-my-initial coming in the week after that...)

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #678 ARCHIE & FRIENDS DOUBLE DIGEST #12 AVENGERS #21 AVENGING SPIDER-MAN #3 BATMAN #5 BATMAN ODYSSEY VOL 2 #4 (OF 7) BIRDS OF PREY #5 BLUE BEETLE #5 BOMB QUEEN VII QUEENS WORLD #2 (OF 4) CALIGULA #6 (OF 6) CAPTAIN ATOM #5 CATWOMAN #5 CHEW #23 CONAN ROAD OF KINGS #12 CROSSED PSYCHOPATH #7 (OF 7) (RES) DANGER GIRL REVOLVER #1 (OF 4) DAREDEVIL #8 DC UNIVERSE PRESENTS #5 DEAD MANS RUN #1 CVR A PARKER DEADPOOL MAX 2 #4 DEFENDERS TOURNAMENT OF HEROES #1 DIABLO #2 (OF 5) DPD DOKTORMENTOR JAIL BABE SURGEON #4 FABLES #113 FEAR ITSELF FEARLESS #7 (OF 12) GENERATION HOPE #15 XREGB GHOST RIDER #8 GHOSTBUSTERS ONGOING #5 GREEN HORNET #21 GREEN LANTERN CORPS #5 HACK SLASH #12 HALO FALL OF REACH INVASION #1 (OF 4) HELLBLAZER #287 HELLRAISER MASTERPIECES #6 INVINCIBLE IRON MAN #512 JOHN CARTER A PRINCESS OF MARS #5 (OF 5) JOHN CARTER OF MARS WORLD OF MARS #4 (OF 4) JUGHEADS DOUBLE DIGEST #177 KIRBY GENESIS DRAGONSBANE #1 LEGION OF MONSTERS #4 (OF 4) LEGION OF SUPER HEROES #5 LORD OF THE JUNGLE #1 MASS EFFECT INVASION #4 (OF 4) MEMORIAL #2 (OF 6) MOON KNIGHT #9 MORNING GLORIES #15 NEW MUTANTS #36 XREGB NIGHTWING #5 PLANET OF THE APES #10 PROPHET #21 RED HOOD AND THE OUTLAWS #5 RED SONJA #62 RED SONJA RAVEN ROBERT JORDAN WHEEL OF TIME EYE O/T WORLD #19 SIMPSONS COMICS #186 SIX GUNS #4 (OF 5) SONIC UNIVERSE #36 STAR TREK ONGOING #5 STEED AND MRS PEEL #1 (OF 6) SUPERGIRL #5 SUPERIOR #7 (OF 7) THUNDER AGENTS VOL 2 #3 (OF 6) THUNDERBOLTS #169 TINY TITANS #48 ULTIMATE COMICS SPIDER-MAN #6 UNCANNY X-FORCE #20 XREGG UNCANNY X-MEN #5 VENOM #12 VOLTRON #2 WASTELAND #33 WONDER WOMAN #5 YOUNG JUSTICE #12

Books / Mags / Stuff BACK ISSUE #54 BILL GRIFFITH LOST AND FOUND 1970 - 1994 TP CONAN HC VOL 11 ROAD OF KINGS PT 1 ELEPHANTMEN HC VOL 00 ESSENTIAL SPIDER-MAN TP VOL 08 NEW ED FEAR ITSELF JOURNEY INTO MYSTERY PREM HC FRAGGLE ROCK CLASSICS TP VOL 01 MARVEL FIRSTS 1970S TP VOL 01 MAZEWORLD GN SECRET SIX THE DARKEST HOUSE TP SONIC THE HEDGEHOG ARCHIVES TP VOL 17 TWELVE TP VOL 01 ULTIMATE COMICS HAWKEYE BY HICKMAN PREM HC WAR OF THE GREEN LANTERNS AFTERMATH HC

 

What looks good to you?

 

-B

Just A gentle Clearing Of The Throat.

No, I haven’t got any actual content for you. Sorry about that but what with one thing and another (mostly the other) it just ain't happening. Lest anyone think I had died, succumbed to The Fear or worse I just did some Coming Attractions and studded them into a load of words about nothing. Photobucket Coming Soon: Statue Fondling For Beginners!

So I thought we might have a little chat you and I.

I mean when I got the call from Mr. Hibbs I just went NuuuRRRR! and kind of ran at the whole business with my chin tucked in to present less of a target. See, if I think about doing something I, well, I never do it. (Judging by the shape of my life I do a lot of thinking.) A pause has occurred so I thought I should maybe introduce myself and, no, no need to guess my name as it’s John Kane and I’m a recover….oh, wrong room.

I am an old Englishman. I use the JohnK (UK) thing not because I am proud of my birth nation (I came of age in the ‘80s so developing pride in my country was never on the table) but because of the Internet. I did start out as “Lamont Cranston” (obviously!) but there was sudden outbreak of decisiveness and I tried to use at least a close approximation of my own name. Sadly other people tended to share whichever username I came up with and, well, some of those people had opinions I didn't want to be associated with. Sticking (UK) on the end solved that. Just in case you thought I was going to start banging on about The Raj or how you Yanks backed the wrong horse when you decided to strike out on your own.

Photobucket Coming Soon: Euro-Filth!

Turns out after trial and error that I’ll not really be concentrating on current comics due to a number of reasons. These being the reasons which now follow. Current comics are pretty well covered and the people covering them do it far better than pretty well. I could still add my voice to the crowd but probably won’t because I just can’t do the whole timeliness thing. Once a month I send some money to my LCS and they send me some comics. What I can write about current comics depends almost totally on what’s in that box. Why do I send them money and why do they send me a parcel? Because my LCS isn't very local at all. I used to live near them but now I don’t but since they have a nice clean shop with knowledgeable, helpful staff, a wide range of stock embracing both the mainstream and the margins and the owner looks like Billy Batson I continue to do business with OKComics in Leeds.  (Am I allowed to mention them, Mr. Hibbs?) It’s mostly the Billy Batson thing, though.

Photobucket Coming Soon: IMMIGRANT!: The Graeme McMillan Story As Told To John Byrne!

So, the contents of the box dictates what I write. Because if there’s nothing in the box I want to talk about I go in the garage. This contains The Kane Archive and I reckon the stuff therein is sufficiently temporally and creatively diffuse that talking about it should be of value. Of course, whether that talking is itself of value is out of the garage’s hands. Actually, you know what, the next time that box arrives I’m going to write something about everything in it. (Obviously this will be the precise moment my LCS sends me my backlog of Housewives At Play.) What? Oh, of course I could have pretty much any comic within hours of its release! I am aware of that. I am aware of the processes involved and since I share the magic of my life with someone who works in IT those processes pose no obstacle. But…yeah, stealing innit?

Photobucket Coming Soon: A Visit To The World's Favourite City Ends Quite Badly For All Involved!

And, no, no I don’t think comics were better in the past. I don’t think they are better now either. Because I’m always reading comics from all over the Timestream I tend to see all comics as being Now. I mean, this is clearly a horeshit way to approach things that totally flies in the face of sense and really gives it the frights what with its flapping wings and all. It’s a bit like that theory of Time Alan Moore keeps pushing about how every moment is occurring at exactly the same instant and if we could find a way to look we would see a whole lot of images we’d rather no one else saw probably involving the bathroom and unorthodox use of hand wash on areas other than hands during our teenage years.

Photobucket Coming Soon: The Gilbert Hernandez Of The '50s!

Apparently I just didn't try hard enough this year as Santa deigned fit to not grace me with any comics whatsoever. I have a sneaking suspicion that Santa shares the household attitude of “humour but don’t encourage” when it comes to comics. So no CONVERSATIONS WITH HOWARD VICTOR CHAYKIN for me! A book I am actually hesitant to get as I fear it can only disappoint expecting as I am transcriptions of conversations with Howard Victor Chaykin as he goes about his humble business on a daily basis. Basically I’m hoping to read about him telling the milkman that it “ain't the heat, it’s the humidity!” or bemoaning to his grocer that surely chocolate bars used to be bigger, or maybe his hands were smaller back in the day and, hey, I hear eating fish gives men titties what with all the hormones in the water. It's probably just some incisive comments on the art of comic bookery or something though. I don't know, do I, Santa!?

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Coming Soon: How To Honk Off An Entire Generation of DC Fans In Three (Fantastic) Issues!

Oh, I did get some comics stuff but without the comics. I mean I got some magnets with DC characters on. I don’t know what they are for but, yes, they are fine magnets with DC characters on them. I got a wallet with MARVEL comics covers. There’s just something humorously appropriate about receiving an empty wallet festooned with MARVEL characters. These were nice, thoughtful gifts but the best was a Captain America T-shirt adorned with a B/W Jack Kirby splash page. There were also Jack Kirby images on the wallet.  I can tell you now that everyone’s Christmas Day was enriched no end by the sight of an old man self harming himself with shattered Christmas baubles and shrieking like a fishwife about  how Jack Kirby Never Gave Up On US!  Man, kids sure can cry a lot when they get going. Got some book vouchers though and you know what they went on (books).So, yeah, judging by the lack of four colour gifts I guess I just wasn't hungry enough this year according to Santa.  Christ, that Santa. What a judgmental prick.

Photobucket Coming Soon: "British People In Hot Weather!"  - Not Just A Fall Song!

Did you have a nice Christmas? I hope SO!

What comics did Santa bring YOU?

And as ever my thanks to The Savage Critics for letting me blemish their site and also to all who read, comment and generally endure me out there in the wilds of The Internet. It is not unappreciated at all. REALLY. Actrually, you could probably just go right on ahead and say it's appreciated. If, you know, you were emotionally demonstrative.

Next time: Proper content!

Cheers and have lovely weekend!

Wait, What? Ep. 70: The Hour (Times 2.5)

Demolition Derby from Jon Pinnow on Vimeo.

The Pact still holds! Another week in 2012, another episode of Wait, What?

We are still experimenting with the done-in-one podcast (although many of you have used our comments thread to weigh in and say you like multiple eps. because it gave you something to look forward to...which I was worried might be the case but nobody articulated it before the change-up). I'm thinking I might get us back to two installments (or more) per ep. because something about it reminds me of the way Marvel U.K. used to chop up stories from U.S. Marvel comics and that sorta fits Graeme and I, in a way.

But, uh, it may be a while because there's something nice about only recording one intro, mixing one episode, etc., etc. So here is all two and half hours of Wait, What? Ep. 70, with the dauntless Graeme McMillan and the all-too-full-of-daunts me talking getting hacked, dreams about comics, Brubaker and Philips' Fatale, the Elseworlds 80 page giant, Chuck Dixon's G.I. Joe comic for IDW and Seal Team Six, Defenders #2, Action Comics #5, OMAC #5, Uncanny X-Men #4, New Teen Titans, Downton Abbey, Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol, Avengers Annual, Freak Angels, Mud Man, Witch Doctor: The Resuscitation and King Cat Comics #72 by John Porcellino (the star of the short embedded above).

Sensible souls surely spotted said spirited show (on iTunes), but for hearty heroes hoping to hear happenings here (hear, hear!):

Wait, What? Ep. 70: The Hour (Times 2.5)

As always, we appreciate your patronage and thank you for listening!

A Minor, Insignificant Question about Mainstream Comics from Abhay

Dear Savage Critic readers, I'm very sorry to bother, but an extremely minor and insignificant question about mainstream comics occurred to me the other day, one that's been nagging at me, that I thought I'd put to you and request your assistance with. Extremely minor; extremely insignificant.  

I probably haven't been paying as close attention to mainstream comics as some of you, and so some of you may be more knowledgeable on this topic than I am.  (Indeed, those less knowledgeable should be warned that there may be spoilers for comics you may want to read someday below).

I'm sure this is a question that's already been asked elsewhere, already discussed at great length by my betters, so I apologize that this is likely well-trod ground. I'm a bit behind. Just a simple question for the more knowledgeable among you.

I was spending my free-time the other day the same way I imagine most you spend your free-time: idly day-dreaming about how awesome THE FLASH is right now, and how THE FLASH is better than all of the other comics, and how anyone who disagrees with that can SUCK IT.  You know:  normal thoughts for an adult person to be thinking with their brains.  (I just happen to be particularly enjoying THE FLASH at the moment, in a way that probably far exceeds any of that comic book's actual merits.)

And so, as I'm reflecting upon THE FLASH-- basking in its glory, some might say-- my thoughts turned to what the book was like for me before the relaunch:  Not Good.

After the relaunch, DC let the book's art team, Francis Manapul and Brian Buccellato, handle the writing. Neither gentleman being professional comic writers by trade, the two instead naively decided to tell a story about how (1) The Flash is a decent guy, (2) The Flash has the coolest powers, (3) The Flash has to face-down gnarly bad guys, and (4) making THE FLASH comics lets them draw/color super-cool things.  Mainstream comics usually aren't about any of those four things because some writer's busy showing off that they know things about, like, politics or whatever, instead; e.g., 2011 was the year where Captain America, Iron Man and Superman all had opinions about THE ECONOMY.

But that wasn't what the comic was like before the relaunch.  No, before the relaunch, The Flash employed a comic writer and the couple issues I checked out in anticipation of our Roundtable discussion on FLASHPOINT, they weren't as focused on those four things.

Instead, the comic writer was building towards his epic crossover, FLASHPOINT, built on the premise that "EVERYTHING YOU KNEW ABOUT THE FLASH'S MOM WAS WRONG."

The FLASHPOINT crossover included a BATMAN spin-off called BATMAN: KNIGHT OF VENGEANCE.  The premise of that comic was  "EVERYTHING YOU KNEW ABOUT BATMAN'S MOM WAS WRONG."

Both comics were  published contemporaneously with Marvel's FEAR ITSELF crossover, which was about how "EVERYTHING YOU KNEW ABOUT THOR'S DAD WAS WRONG."  (Uh: and also something about "escape", apparently).

Which ... and here's where I show my ignorance, and mention comics I haven't read...but this was published around the same time as the relaunch of ULTIMATE SPIDERMAN.  Which I've been told began with stories about how "EVERYTHING SPIDERMAN KNOWS ABOUT HIS DAD AND UNCLE IS WRONG."

And published within the vicinity of a series called S*H*I*E*L*D*, which again I've been told is about how "EVERYTHING YOU KNOW ABOUT MISTER FANTASTIC'S DAD AND IRON MAN'S DADS IS WRONG."

And in spitting distance of the highly publicized BATMAN R.I.P., which teased readers with the prospect that "EVERYTHING BATMAN KNOWS ABOUT HIS DAD IS WRONG."

And spitting distance of the mystery of the Red Hulk-- another comic I didn't read, but the resolution of which was apparently that "EVERYTHING YOU KNOW ABOUT THE HULK'S WIFE'S DAD IS WRONG."

I mean, I know this isn't the most unusual theme in fiction.  It's been done before.  I have half a memory of a stretch of either John Byrne or Jerry Ordway's SUPERMAN that concerned the mystery of whether Lex Luthor or Perry White had impregnated Perry White's wife.  The way I remember it, Lex Luthor mistakenly thought you could get a girl pregnant from the mouth.  They were trying to make a point how Lex Luthor post-Crisis wasn't a scientific genius anymore, but Jesus, that was a pretty extreme way of going about it, if you ask me.  My memories are pretty fuzzy, though, so I may be off on some of the minor details there.

That comic RUNAWAYS was well-liked-- I suppose that was built on the same basic foundation of Parent Secrets.  Or I want to say that I heard YOUNG AVENGERS might have had similar ideas in it somewhere...?

So my questions:

1. Am I misremembering details of comics I've never read that I only half-heard about, or are mainstream comics especially fixated on this theme lately?

2.  If the latter, were comics equally fascinated with this theme in earlier periods?

My loose, under-educated and malnourished understanding of mainstream comics history bros is that, basically, you had the Obscure WW2-Era Bros whose themes were that evil can go fuck itself and that dudes be getting stabbed in the eyes; the 60's Bros who cared a lot about people who were different being treated equally; the Acid-Stoner Bros, who cared about acid and skulls and just contemplating the concept of motherfucking infinity; the Punk Bros (followed by the Acid House Bros, though they arguably did their best work out of the mainstream, with obvious exceptions); the Crosshatch Bros, and then, the Movie Brat Bros, right? None of whom really struck me as being especially parent-oriented, thinking back on them.

Granted, in WATCHMEN, "EVERYTHING LAURIE JUPITER KNEW ABOUT HER MOM AND DAD WAS WRONG."  They didn't shy away from those themes.  But I don't know that I'd especially call it a dominant feature of 80's British Invasion superhero comics, either.

Did we shift into the Parent Bro Era of Comics at some point and I just didn't notice?

3.  Is this a theme that's meaningful to... anybody?  If I found out everything I knew about my parents was wrong, I'd be pretty bummed about it, I guess, but at the end of the day, I'd still have to make rent.  So.  I suppose it's a powerful theme for little kids...?

4.  Also:  are comics outside of the mainstream, from Image, Vertigo, Oni, Boom, D&Q, Fantagraphics,etc., are those comics fixated on this theme too right now?

In one of the Appendixes of PAYING FOR IT, Chester Brown did theorize about a world where "EVERYTHING YOU KNEW ABOUT A GIRL YOU PAY FOR SEX'S MOM IS WRONG" (spoiler: you can also pay the mom for sex), but that doesn't seem like the same thing.

Those are my questions. I apologize for those of you bored by these questions, as this has probably been discussed ad nauseam elsewhere.  Thank you in advance for your assistance, and Happy New Year.

http://youtu.be/oc7b62El_fk

 

 

 

 

 

Arriving 1/11/12

Comics Comics Comics!

7 WARRIORS #3 (OF 3) (MR) ACTIVITY #2 ALL NEW BATMAN THE BRAVE AND THE BOLD #15 AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #677 ARCHIE DOUBLE DIGEST #225 AVENGERS 1959 #5 (OF 5) BATGIRL #5 BATMAN AND ROBIN #5 BATTLE SCARS #3 (OF 6) BATWOMAN #5 BLACK PANTHER MOST DANGEROUS MAN ALIVE #528 BRILLIANT #2 (MR) BTVS SEASON 9 FREEFALL #5 CAPTAIN AMERICA #7 CARNAGE USA #2 (OF 5) CARTOON NETWORK ACTION PACK #66 DAKEN DARK WOLVERINE #19 DARK MATTER #1 (OF 4) DARK TOWER GUNSLINGER WAY STATION #2 (OF 5) DARKNESS #97 CVR A HAUN (MR) DC UNIVERSE ONLINE LEGENDS #21 DEADLANDS BLACK WATER ONE SHOT DEADPOOL #49 DEATHSTROKE #5 DEMON KNIGHTS #5 FORMIC WARS SILENT STRIKE #2 (OF 5) FRANKENSTEIN AGENT OF SHADE #5 GREEN LANTERN #5 GRIFTER #5 HEART #3 (OF 4) (MR) HP LOVECRAFT THE DUNWICH HORROR #4 (OF 4) INCREDIBLE HULK #4 INVINCIBLE #87 JOURNEY INTO MYSTERY #633 KULL THE CAT & THE SKULL #4 (OF 4) LAST OF THE GREATS #4 LEGION LOST #5 LOBSTER JOHNSON THE BURNING HAND #1 (OF 5) MAGNETO NOT A HERO #3 (OF 4) MEGA MAN #9 REG CVR MISTER TERRIFIC #5 MORIARTY #8 MY GREATEST ADVENTURE #4 (OF 6) NEW AVENGERS #20 NORTHANGER ABBEY #3 (OF 5) NORTHLANDERS #47 (MR) OPERATION BROKEN WINGS 1936 #3 (OF 3) (MR) ORCHID #4 PC CAST HOUSE OF NIGHT #3 (OF 5) PIGS #5 (MR) PUNISHERMAX #21 (MR) RAY #2 (OF 4) REED GUNTHER #7 RESURRECTION MAN #5 ROGER LANGRIDGES SNARKED #4 SCALPED #55 (MR) SCARLET SPIDER #1 SECRET AVENGERS #21 SEVERED #6 (OF 7) (MR) SHADE #4 (OF 12) SPAWN #215 STAND NIGHT HAS COME #6 (OF 6) STAR WARS AGENT O/T EMPIRE IRON ECLIPSE #2 (OF 5) STAR WARS KNIGHTS OF THE OLD REPUBLIC WAR #1 (OF 5) STRANGE TALENT OF LUTHER STRODE #4 (OF 6) (MR) SUICIDE SQUAD #5 SUPER HEROES #22 SUPERBOY #5 THE OCCULTIST #3 (OF 3) THE STRAIN #2 (OF 12) TRANSFORMERS MORE THAN MEETS EYE ONGOING #1 ULTIMATE COMICS X-MEN #6 UNWRITTEN #33 (MR) WHISPERS #1 WOLVERINE #300 WOLVERINE AND X-MEN #4 XREGG X-FACTOR #230 XREGG X-MEN LEGACY #260.1

Books / Mags / Stuff ADVENTURES OF HUCKLEBERRY FINN HC ARCHIE BEST OF DAN DECARLO HC VOL 03 AVENGERS BY BRIAN MICHAEL BENDIS TP VOL 02 BATMAN THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS HC BEFORE THE INCAL CLASSIC COLL DLX HC (MR) (C: 0-1-2) BLUE ESTATE TP VOL 02 (MR) BROOKLYN DREAMS HC BURKE & HARE GN DARK TOWER GUNSLINGER BATTLE OF TULL PREM HC ESSENTIAL MARVEL TWO IN ONE TP VOL 04 FEAR ITSELF AVENGERS PREM HC FLASH TP VOL 01 THE DASTARDLY DEATH OF THE ROGUES GHOST RIDER BY DANIEL WAY ULTIMATE COLLECTION TP HELLRAISER TP VOL 02 (MR) INTREPIDS TP VOL 01 INVINCIBLE TP VOL 15 GET SMART LORDS OF DEATH AND LIFE GN MYSTIC TENTH APPRENTICE TP PEZ MARVEL 2011 BLISTER PACK 12 CT DISPLAY (NET) (O/A) (C: 1 PREACHER HC BOOK 06 (MR) SPIDER-MAN SPIDER-ISLAND HC STAR WARS LEGACY TP VOL 11 WAR (C: 0-1-2) STEVE DITKO OMNIBUS HC VOL 02 UNWRITTEN TP VOL 05 ON TO GENESIS (MR) WOLVERINE BEST THERE IS CONTAGION TP YOUNG JUSTICE TP VOL 01

What looks good to YOU?

 

-B

"I Want To Be That Man!" Comics! Sometimes A Little Melodrama Doesn't Hurt!

Happy New Year and I do so hope you all had a very Merry Season of Cheer! Sadly I read some more DC war comics from the '70s and then wrote about 'em! Photobucket

I think you'll find I can and, worse, I did!

SHOWCASE PRESENTS: THE UNKNOWN SOLDIER By Joe Kubert, Irv Novick, Doug Wildey, Dan Spiegle, Jack Sparling, Gerry Talaoc (Art) with  Joe Kubert, Bob Haney, Robert Kanigher, Archie Goodwin, Frank Robbins and David Michelinie (Words) (DC Comics, $16.99, 2006)

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Art by Joe Kubert

(N.B. All images are taken from original copies of the comics on loan from the Kane Archive. The book under discussion itself is B&W. However the guy who wrote this was unable to satisfactorily wrestle his SHOWCASE onto the scanner and achieve pleasing results. The images in the book are excellent but THEY ARE IN BLACK AND WHITE!)

1. The Twice Born Man: Origin(s) of A Living Legend

It sounds like something Steve Allen might drone as he extended a limp arm in welcome to his next guest; “And now…the man no one knows yet is known by everyone…!” but it isn't rather it’s the tag line for the Immortal G.I. himself  - The Unknown Soldier. This SHOWCASE PRESENTS volume collects his first 38 issues in the form a big B&W brick of crisply reproduced pages. The Soldier (as I shall for brevity’s sake refer to him hereafter) was created by Robert Kanigher and Joe Kubert in OUR ARMY AT WAR #168 (June 1966). In 1970 The Soldier took over the lead in STAR SPANGLED WAR STORIES with #151. Judging by the letter columns (not reproduced) it seems the then lead Enemy Ace feature while popular wasn't popular enough, so The Soldier’s appearance was intended to find a lead feature which would engage with enough readers to prevent cancellation. The concept seems to have been an attempt to create a super-hero for WW2 but one with at least some realistic grounding.

In his first appearance The Soldier is presented as the latest in a family in which the males are bred to serve the US in times of war as troubleshooting masters of disguise. They have been doing this since The Revolutionary War. Don’t worry if this is news to you because someone clearly had an attack of sense and this silliness was redacted in #154 with a second origin. According to the second, more popular, and better, origin The Immortal G.I. was originally a (never named) grunt who lost both his brother (Harry) and his face in a Japanese attack.  Just before death and disfigurement visit the pair Harry tells the Legend-to-be that “one guy can affect the outcome of a whole war! One guy in the right place…at the right...time…”  It’s lucky for comics that Harry didn't choose to that moment regale his sibling with tales of which cheerleaders he wished he’d banged back home or how he was shipping machine gun parts back piece by piece to settle scores when he got Stateside; lucky because it’s these words that lead the defaced survivor to dedicate his life to being that “one guy in the right place…” and in being such a man to become a Legend. The Legend of The Unknown Soldier.

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Art by Gerry Talaoc

Following his training the Soldier is a dab hand at creating an accurate mask of a person, impeccable at intuiting their body language and mannerisms and very convincing when it comes to replicating vocal inflections. And he can usually do all that from just a photograph. Look, it’s a ‘70s WW2 war comic dreamt up on the fly about a guy with a bandaged face who can impersonate anyone; a comic largely intended to entertain; a series that ends with The Soldier making Hitler die like a dog in his bunker while on a mission to stop vampiric octopi being unleashed (note: not in this volume as it is a couple of decades later).  It’s just one of those series where the dumb and the excessive combine to create a flavour of awesome only some palates will savour. Most of the time.

Sometimes the comic goes off-mission and starts to stray into more realistic areas.  And it’s when the realism starts to chafe at the entertainment that I find the series at its most interesting. So, those are the aspects I’ll be concentrating on as I drivel on about a select few issues of STAR SPANGLED WAR STORIES Featuring: THE UNKNOWN SOLDIER.

2. Unrealistic Realism: Joe Kubert

The first phase of The Soldier’s adventures in this book are dominated by Joe Kubert. Kubert’s tales typically place The Soldier in a real event (The Doolittle raid on Tokyo, the July 20th bomb plot against Hitler) or make broad points about heroism and sacrifice in at least marginally realistic scenarios. On the whole the comic booky nature of the hero and Kubert’s obvious brief to entertain work against his more serious intentions and so I've picked an issue which demonstrates this tension between the real and the fantastic more than most:

The Unknown Soldier in TOTENTANZ By Joe Kubert (a) and Bob Haney (w) Originally appeared in STAR SPANGLED WAR STORIES #158 (DC Comics, $0.25, 1971) Reprinted in black & white in SHOWCASE PRESENTS: THE UNKNOWN SOLDIER (DC Comics, $16.99, 2006)

 Totentanz is German for “dance of death” and it is used here as the name of the concentration camp setting for the latest mission for The Soldier. Unlike most concentration camp stories it starts with a joke:

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Art by Joe Kubert

Threatening the inmates of a Concentration Camp with death may very well be the very definition of black humour. Beyond black even; anthracitic humour. It’s not a nice joke, but it is a joke. Beyond the gallows humour it’s pretty much the usual Joe Kubert war comic cover (which is to say it is a piece of excellence in and of itself, never mind the pages it is stapled to) in form at least. But in content it’s far from usual. There are children staring out from behind the wire. If you think that’s funny, congratulations, you’re really transgressive.

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Art by Joe Kubert

Joe Kubert edited and drew this story so I’m going to assume he was the driving force behind the result.  Now, given his decades of excellence in and influence upon comics I doubt I have to tell anyone that Joe Kubert is Jewish. He also appears to be quite serious about this Jewishness. ( If the dryly amusing introduction to THE ADVENTURES OF YAAKOV AND JOSEF (2004) is to be believed Kubert only did the series of faith based stories after being browbeaten by a Rabbi.) Also, Kubert hasn't been one to shirk from documenting man’s inhumanity to man as the OGN FAX FROM SARAJEVO (1996) attests. Then there’s the OGN YOSSEL:APRIL 19, 1943 (2003). Basically if you read a decent proportion of Joe Kubert’ work you will soon start to see recurring themes and interests; Jewishness, The Holocaust, man's inhumanity to man and Tor. (Christ, Joe Kubert will never give up on Tor.) There’s all that stuff and more but essentially there’s this:  Joe Kubert’s family fled Poland to America to escape the Nazis. At least those of Joe Kubert’s family who survived the Nazis did so.

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Art by Joe Kubert

I’ll not lie; Totentanz is as silly a story as most Unknown Soldier tales. The actual plot doesn't even make much sense. It’s very Bob Haney (1926 – 2004); which is to say his brio and level of craft manage to keep you reading despite all the increasing inconsistencies and illogicalities. That’s okay because Joe Kubert just wants a story set in a concentration camp and Bob Haney gives him that. And Joe Kubert wants a story set in a concentration camp so that he can at least suggest some of the inhuman foulness of such a place. And Joe Kubert gives us that. He gives us that right from the off with an opening splash that looks like this:

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Art by Joe Kubert

And the whole story is basically an excused to present a series of terrible images of terrible things, a succession of suffering. Sadly for Joe Kubert this comic was made in 1971 and I don’t believe there was a writer working in comics then who could provide a text able to completely vanquish any qualms concerning tastelessness or, perhaps worse to today's audience, obviousness. Haney has a good go though with stuff like “testifying to the awful “fuel” within!” but he’s still effectively hamstrung by the fact that he’s writing what is essentially a children’s comic and his own limitations as a writer. Which is to say; he’s a fine ‘70s comic book writer but this tale’s a bit out of his reach. By their very nature Comics have always lagged in the writing department (and they still do despite what the writers say) but the Kubert's horrifically arresting art here is sufficient to achieve his purpose but it has to do it bluntly; so bluntly it might repel modern sensibilities. Also, maybe a subject like The Holocaust can’t be finessed. Once you get behind the wire things get primitive real fast and maybe intellectualizing this stuff just serves to dilute the impact. If a comic about Concentration camps doesn't leave you feeling sick that’s probably a worse comic about concentration camps than one that’s got a silly plot but does, at least, leave you feeling like someone’s hit you in the face with a shovel a few times. So yeah, like most of these stories in the Kubert part of the book Totentanz is hampered by the limits of mainstream genre comics of its time but is still pretty entertaining due to the strengths such comics had (compression, momentum, clarity of purpose). Unlike the other Kubert tales it aims a bit higher and, alas, fails a bit more but it gets its point across alright which isn't too shabby an achievement.

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Art by Joe Kubert

3. Ruddy Good Fun And Race Hate: Archie Goodwin & Frank Robbins

Phew! Industrialised genocide sure puts a damper on things doesn't it? Let’s try and fill that uncomfortable silence and get the party mood going again with some race hate! It’s surprising to find such a subject in the next section of the book which I have designated as being The Goodwin/Robbins Bit. Archie Goodwin (1937-1998) was, of course, possibly the greatest Editor in comics. He’s certainly one of my favourites (along with Andrew Helfer in case anyone gave a toss) and back when Editors did Editing Stuff rather than whatever they do now he was The Best. I suppose you want some kind of supporting evidence because you have mistaken this for some kind of disciplined text instead of the rambling nonsense it so clearly is. Well, do you know how Archie Goodwin edited STARSTRUCK? By doing nothing to it. Clearly Archie Goodwin knew when to hold ‘em and when to fold ‘em. He was also a pretty good writer but his work in the BLAZING COMBAT collection is better evidence of that than anything here. Here Goodwin has clearly been asked to provide espionage capers and he does so. They are okay, they are entertaining but they aren't as good as Frank Robbins’ (1917 – 1994) stories. Or at least one of Frank Robbins’ stories. This one:

The Unknown Soldier in A TOWN CALLED HATE! By Jack Sparling(a) and Frank Robbins(w) Originally appeared in STAR SPANGLED WAR STORIES #179 (DC Comics, $0.20, 1974) Reprinted in black & white in SHOWCASE PRESENTS: THE UNKNOWN SOLDIER (DC Comics, $16.99, 2006)

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Art by Joe Kubert

Unlike Totentanz this tale succeeds on the strength of the writing rather than the art. Jack Sparling was, I’m sure, a lovely man and a joy to all he met but his art here is functional; this being no small praise in the days when they had to chuck this stuff out at a rate of knots. But it’s the writing that makes this one worthy of attention. Which is a bit of a shocker I can tell you. Prior to this issue Frank Robbins has seemed content to provide capers in the style of Goodwin bur with the pulp ridiculousness turned up to Purple. Entertainment is the name of the game with these and as a result they haven’t aged too well although I’m sure any 7 year olds were thrilled to bits which, let’s be fair, was pretty much the point of this stuff. Following tales in which shaven headed Nazis torture young Belgian girls while leering over the contents of their straining sweaters and flicking fag ash in their desperate eyes to have Robbins suddenly get all serious is certainly arresting. It’s just not what you expect from someone who has committed “What—What does an apprentice cheese-maker know of…DEATH DEVICES?” to posterity. I mean I’m glad he did because I like a laugh too but I’m more grateful for A Town Called Hate.

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Art by Jack Sparling

In “a small French town near the Malmedy area” (which probably isn't really called "Hate") an all-black engineers corps are greeted by a white soldier with some racist banter. That night several of them are machine gunned in their bunks. The survivors immediately blame “Those dirty, muther-lovin’ WHITE TRASH...!” and toss a grenade into a bunkhouse of their sleeping Caucasian comrades. The town is now a battleground with sides divided on racial grounds. Enter The Soldier. Except...The Soldier is unavailable so the task falls to his comrade Chat Noir. As is explained by the man himself “..it means “Black Cat!” I AM black …and PROUD of it!” Robbins’ does a nice job in the conversation between Chat and a General of showing how racism exists in less overt forms than the violence we have seen. Chat picks him up on the use of “your people” and seethes over being addressed as “boy”. If the current conflict can be ceased that isn't going to mean the end of racism and the beginning of a bold new dawn but first things first and off Chat trots.

Luckily The Soldier ends up in the same town (it’s a comic!) but he’s posing as a German and then joins some Germans disguised as Americans which makes him an American posing as a German who is posing as an American. This is confusing but accurate what with the Germans actually using such tactics during the Battle of The Bulge. So there are German wandering around disguised as G.I.s and…oh, you've figured it out! Clearly the black soldiers were killed by a German posing as a Yank!  And, yes, so the evidence indicates and the plucky G.I.s team back up and start fighting the right war again. How neat and quaint except…it isn't. Robbins has The Soldier and Chat realize that in fact the violence was sparked by a racist G.I. but the obvious, yet wrong, solution was used to get the guys back together and pointing their guns in the right direction. I like that a lot. I like the fact Robbins doesn't take the easy way out, in fact I like it so much I brought it to your attention. Robbins takes a pretty big subject dresses it in genre trappings without losing sight of the fact the subject is bigger than the tale he’s telling. He does a good job. There’s not a lot of nuance, y’know. But again, how much nuance do you really need? Racism isn't right. It’s not open to debate. That’s it. End of.

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Art by Jack Sparling

4. Subterfuge And (Sub)Text: Michelenie & Talaoc

I am a great fan of the Michelinie/Talaoc stories. This may be because this is where I came in when I was a kid but it may also be because they are very good. For me Michelinie seems to be the first writer to really nail the concept. Given the evidence in this book his stories take the form of morality plays spliced with espionage thrillers. There’s always a more personal, more human conflict being addressed within the wider conflict of WW2 in which the stories take place. Again, they aren't big on nuance (today's word is: nuance!); there is never any doubt what the stories are supposed to be demonstrating but they are big on characterisation and entertainment. They never forget that they are pulp and this together with a pretty dark sense of humour saves them from becoming preachy. No one likes preachiness! Except preachers, I guess.

The Unknown Soldier in 8,000 To One By Gerry Talaoc(a) and David Michelinie(w) Originally appeared in STAR SPANGLED WAR STORIES #183 (DC Comics, $0.20, 1974) Reprinted in black & white in SHOWCASE PRESENTS: THE UNKNOWN SOLDIER (DC Comics, $16.99, 2006)

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Art by Joe Kubert

Did you know that Hitler had a “hands off” policy regarding Jews in Denmark? Well in 1943 it appeared Der Fuhrer regretted his largesse and changed his nasty mind. In this tale plans have been made to ship 8,000 Jews to safety , but this plan has been compromised – enter The Soldier! Posing as a Kommando The Soldier hits an early roadblock when upon reporting to his superior the Colonel orders his men to “Kill Him!” Naturally The Soldier goes Mortal Kombat on them and it turns out that this was only “a test!”. This is awesome pulpness but Michelinie slips in the caption, “…no time to think of the lives hanging in the balance. I had only time to – REACT!” A caption which appears redundant but is important later. Shortly thereafter The Soldier meets Inger.

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Art by Gerry Talaoc

Inger’s a real piece of work. Inger is a Jew working with the Nazis who will do “anything” to stay alive. That’s what Inger’s about – staying alive. Like The Bee Gees. She knows what the Nazis are all about when it comes to The Jews (what the Nazis are all about with The Jews is bad). A failed attempt is made on Inger’s life and she recognises the dead assassin as her brother. She weeps but doesn't recant. This is pretty good stuff. I mean, I don’t want to die and I also don’t want to help Nazis and I know I’d like to make the right choice but…hey, you never know do you? I don’t like Inger but I understand Inger. A couple of pages later in fine pulp tradition Inger has outlived her usefulness and become “expendable!” As a final test of loyalty (the Germans still have suspicions what with The Soldier getting up to all kinds of stuff I haven’t told you about) The Soldier is ordered to shoot her.

Does he:

a) Shoot her. b) Turn his weapon on the Germans, escape with her and sail off with The 8,000 Jews. c) Disarm everyone with laughter by doing an impression of a drunk monkey.

The correct answer is:

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Art by Gerry Talaoc

I mean he isn't happy about it or anything. In fact he even has a caption: “Like the trembling girl before me the War left me no choice…Remember Soldier, one slip-up…and 8,000 innocent people…will die!”” Hey, maybe this can usefully be juxtaposed with the earlier caption where he didn't have time to think. Here he has time to think, but in the end he still has to do the same thing: kill. One more time in case anyone missed it: “Like the trembling girl before me the war left me no choice…” Because isn't that the point of the whole story? Inger made a choice but in the end she might as well not have done: she still ended up dead. She just betrayed 8,000 people for a couple more weeks of life. It’s pretty sad really. What? Oh, The 8,000 Jews get away but it wasn't really about them it was about one Jew who should have been hateful but ended up being tragic. As ever there’s not a lot of nuance (!) but there is a lot of excitement, action and heart. And I guess that’s why, despite the formidable talent preceding them Michelinie and Talaoc’s Unknown Soldier stories are the best in this book. Or maybe it’s just because I read them when I was a kid. This stuff really did a number on your head as a kid, y’know?

5. Gerry’s Vase

Alright! Stop shuffling about in your seats this is the last bit. I just wanted to draw attention to the work of Gerry Talaoc in this book. Gerry Talaoc was never better than here. Which is a stupid thing to say since I haven’t seen everything Gerry Talaoc’s ever done. But since the stuff here is so freaking awesome it’s hard to believe he did better stuff and everyone’s just keeping quiet about it when I enter the room. People aren't exactly shouting about this stuff after all are they? Talaoc’s art on these Unknown Soldier stories is fantastic. Everything has a really grubby look to it. Absolutely no one looks like a movie star, everyone looks human and by “human” I mean a bit weird, a bit like life’s had a good go at them. He does have a tendency to make his figures gangly but that just works out really well too because when he cracks out the action it has a unique flailing look. Have you ever been in a fight? It isn't like a Bourne film (I’m assuming you’re a normal person not a professional cage fighter or something) it’s like a Gerry Talaoc comic. Lots of flailing, gnarled face pulling, shabby desperation, yeah, Gerry Talaoc’s fighting is pretty convincing. Best of all though is what I’m calling, in an attempt to get in The Comics Journal, Gerry’s Vase. In 8,000 To One there’s this bit of business with a vase. It’s totally inconsequential to the action but its beautiful. Look:

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Art by Gerry Talaoc

I bet that vase wasn’t in the script he just did it. Physical objects in the drawn environment reacting to the actions within that environment. Should be standard stuff but it isn’t. After all when was the last time you saw Gerry’s Vase?

Hopefully I’ve managed to give some indication of why SHOWCASE PRESENTS: THE UNKNOWN SOLDIER is VERY GOOD! If I haven’t, well, that’s on me because it is. That’s it. Well done, thanks for coming. Don’t forget to collect your coats.

Have a good weekend everyone!

CE 2011: Publisher break down

I'm slightly embarrassed to say I've never thought to check for this before, but how about looking at things in terms of publisher breakdowns? The chart that follows is sales (all categories) broken out by publisher.

However, this just a quick report, so we have to caveat, a little: all of the "publisher" field data is straight of what comes off the Diamond monthly data dump. I generally ignore that field in day-to-day operation, so if there are mistakes there, I can't help ya' pardner.

Diamond also has a few.... odd naming habits. Eros and Fantagraphics are split, for example. There's a few more oddities in there as well.

This list will only show the first 79 pubs, those with an arbitrary 0.1% marketshare -- there are 169 other publishers who have had a sale in my store (actually, way way way more, since I don't put any data in that field for mini-comics or other over-the-counter transactions) in 2011 that I'm not showing you. Those other publishers represent about 2.5% of my overall sales.

DC COMICS 30.2%
MARVEL COMICS 24.4%
DARK HORSE COMICS 7.6%
IMAGE COMICS 6.5%
IDW PUBLISHING 2.8%
FANTAGRAPHICS BOOKS 2.5%
D. E. 2.4%
DRAWN & QUARTERLY 1.8%
PANTHEON BOOKS 1.7%
BOOM! STUDIOS 1.6%
AVATAR PRESS INC 1.4%
TOP SHELF PRODUCTIONS 1.1%
ARCHAIA ENTERTAINMENT LLC 0.9%
HUMANOIDS INC 0.8%
REBELLION / 2000AD 0.7%
:01 FIRST SECOND 0.7%
ONI PRESS INC. 0.6%
IDEA & DESIGN WORKS LLC 0.5%
EUROTICA 0.5%
HARPER COLLINS PUBLISHERS 0.4%
BONGO COMICS 0.4%
ARCHIE COMIC PUBLICA 0.4%
KODANSHA COMICS 0.4%
VERTICAL INC 0.4%
VIZ MEDIA LLC 0.3%
GRAPHIX 0.3%
ABSTRACT STUDIOS 0.3%
ABRAMS COMICARTS 0.3%
CHRONICLE BOOKS 0.2%
TITAN PUBLISHING 0.2%
VILLARD BOOKS 0.2%
EROS COMIX 0.2%
HEAVY METAL MAGAZINE 0.2%
WW NORTON 0.2%
CARTOON BOOKS 0.2%
TWOMORROWS PUBLISHING 0.2%
GRAPHITTI DESIGNS 0.2%
Little Brown and Company 0.2%
BLOOMSBURY 0.2%
ABRAMS 0.1%
HILL & WANG 0.1%
LAST GASP 0.1%
HOUGHTON MIFFLIN HARCOURT 0.1%
THREE RIVERS PRESS 0.1%
KNOCKABOUT COMICS 0.1%
DIAMOND COMIC DIST--ENGLAND 0.1%
RED 5 COMICS 0.1%
NBM 0.1%
SPIEGEL & GRAU 0.1%
KENZER & COMPANY 0.1%
METROPOLITAN BOOKS 0.1%
AIRSHIP ENTERTAINMENT 0.1%
SCHOLASTIC INC. 0.1%
UNIVERSE 0.1%
EVIL TWIN COMICS 0.1%
EAGLEMOSS PUBLICATIONS LTD 0.1%
APE ENTERTAINMENT 0.1%
AMAZE INK (SLAVE LABOR GRAPHIC 0.1%
SQPINC 0.1%
THOMAS DUNNE BOOKS 0.1%
PAPERCUTZ 0.1%
RADICAL PUBLISHING 0.1%
FULCRUM PUBLISHING 0.1%
TOP COW 0.1%
ADHOUSE BOOKS 0.1%
LEGENDARY COMICS 0.1%
TOUCHSTONE 0.1%
WATSON GUPTILL 0.1%
DEL REY 0.1%
GEMSTONE PUBLISHING 0.1%
WIZARD ENTERTAINMENT 0.1%
HYPERION BOOKS 0.1%
W.W. NORTON 0.1%
ATOMIC BOOK COMPANY 0.1%
AARDVARK VANAHEIM 0.1%
TITAN COMICS 0.1%

 

Edit:

Here's one more chart, even more suspect.... "Genre". This category is 100% pure Diamond, and is NOTHING like how I'd design a similar check, but it's a onestep output, so I ran it.

(Optic Nerve is "Reality Based", while Archie is "Humor", Akira is "Science Fiction", and Bone is "Fantasy", Y The Last Man is "fantasy" while Preacher is "Horror" )

The Diamond lists are REALLY screwed up, though, cuz I went to see what, say, "anime" might be, and Diamond had things like "Negative Burn, Very Best from 93-98" and "Flight v2" listed with that as a category, which suggests that mostly they're mistypes from a data entry department that isn't paying a lot of attention when they're trying to select/paste/whatever on "Anthology".

("Seasonal based" on the other hand, appears to be the 2 cases of Justice League Pez that sold through the year)

Anyway enough carping, here you go:

Superhero 49.7%
Horror 13.0%
Fantasy 10.6%
Science Fiction 6.3%
Humor 5.5%
Reality-Based 5.0%
Action/Adventure 3.4%
Crime 3.0%
Adult 1.2%
Romance 0.8%
War 0.7%
No Genre/All Genres 0.3%
Anthologies 0.2%
Music 0.1%
Anthropomorphics 0.1%
Anime 0.0%
Sports 0.0%
Seasonal Merchandise 0.0%
*None* 0.0%
WildStorm 0.0%
INDIE 0.0%

 

As always, I welcome any comments you might have!

 

-B

 

Wait, What? Ep. 69: First In Twelve

Photobucket It's 2012 and it's time for Wait, What? Ep. 69, the podcast that's not nearly as good at replying in its comment threads as it probably should be!

Graeme and I decided to do this all in one since the majority of the response we got were either indifferent to the process or preferred the longer podcasts that allow our tendencies to ramble to eventually get to some kind of point. Do you disagree? Prefer two one+ hour 'casts to one two+ hour one? Want them even shorter? Wouldn't mind them even longer? Let us know your thoughts either in the comments thread here or over at waitwhatpodcast AT gmail.com.

And while you're doing so, check out Episode 69, in which the charming Mr. McMillan and the chatty Mr. McMe discuss Christmas presents, ethical dilemmas, Daredevil #7, The first part of Batman: Leviathan Strikes, the fourth issues of Justice League, Wonder Woman, and Batman #4, Tales Designed to Thrizzle, Pope Hats by Ethan Rilly, The Annotated Sandman, and the insanity that is Crying Freeman. It's all in good fun, and almost no one gets hurt!

Choosy mothers may have chosen iTunes, but mothers of invention are more than welcome to let their freak flag unfurl and listen to us below:

Wait, What? Ep. 69: First In Twelve

As ever, we  hope you enjoy and thank you for listening!

Arriving 1/4/2012

First ship week of the year is subdued, but it has a few winners in it -- I'm especially looking forward to the first issue of Brubaker & Phillips' FATALE! 2000 AD #1763 2000 AD PROG 2012 ACTION COMICS #5 ANIMAL MAN #5 ARTIFACTS #13 (OF 13) AVENGERS ACADEMY #24 AVENGERS ANNUAL #1 AVENGERS X-SANCTION #2 (OF 4) BATWING #5 BETRAYAL O/T PLANET O/T APES #3 (OF 4) BETTY & VERONICA DOUBLE DIGEST #197 BLOOD RED DRAGON #3 BOYS #62 BRODYS GHOST ONE SHOT COLD WAR #4 CYCLOPS #8 DEFENDERS #2 DETECTIVE COMICS #5 ELRIC THE BALANCE LOST #7 FATALE #1 FEAR ITSELF FEARLESS #6 (OF 12) FERALS #1 FLASH GORDON ZEITGEIST #2 GODZILLA LEGENDS #3 (OF 5) GOON #37 GRAVEYARD OF EMPIRES #3 GREEN ARROW #5 HAWK AND DOVE #5 HELLRAISER #9 HELLRAISER MASTERPIECES #5 HULK #47 HUNTRESS #4 (OF 6) IRREDEEMABLE #33 IZOMBIE #21 JURASSIC PARK DANGEROUS GAMES #5 (OF 5) JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL #5 LADY DEATH (ONGOING) #13 LIFE WITH ARCHIE #16 MEN OF WAR #5 MUDMAN #2 NOWHERE MAN #1 (OF 4) OMAC #5 PEANUTS #1 (OF 4) PENGUIN PAIN AND PREJUDICE #4 (OF 5) PUNISHER #7 RACHEL RISING #4 RED LANTERNS #5 ROBOCOP ROAD TRIP #1 SCOOBY DOO WHERE ARE YOU #17 SHINKU #4 STAR TREK LEGION OF SUPERHEROES #4 (OF 6) STATIC SHOCK #5 STORMWATCH #5 SUPER DINOSAUR #7 SUPERNATURAL #4 (OF 6) SWAMP THING #5 SWEET TOOTH #29 TANK GIRL CARIOCA #3 (OF 3) THE LONE RANGER #1 THOR DEVIANTS SAGA #3 (OF 5) THUNDERBOLTS #168 UNCANNY X-FORCE #19.1 UNCANNY X-MEN #4 VALEN OUTCAST #2 MAIN CVRS VILLAINS FOR HIRE #2 (OF 4) WARLORD OF MARS DEJAH THORIS #9 WITCHBLADE #151 CVR A CHRISTOPHER WOLVERINE AND X-MEN ALPHA AND OMEGA #1 (OF 5) X-23 #20 X-CLUB #2 (OF 5) X-MEN #23 XREGB

Books / Mags / Stuff ALTER EGO #106 ANNOTATED SANDMAN HC VOL 01 AVENGERS ACADEMY TP VOL 02 REAL WORLD BATMAN THE DARK KNIGHT HC VOL 01 GOLDEN DAWN DLX ED BATMAN THE RETURN OF BRUCE WAYNE TP BPRD HELL ON EARTH TP VOL 02 GODS AND MONSTERS CHARLIE ADLARD CURSE O/T WENDIGO TP DC SUPERHERO FIG COLL MAG #96 PHANTOM STRANGER DC SUPERHERO FIG COLL MAG #97 CHEETAH EERIE ARCHIVES HC VOL 09 ENDERS GAME ULTIMATE COLLECTION TP FEAR ITSELF PREM HC HOGANS ALLEY #18 HULK WORLD WAR HULKS HC INSURRECTION TP INVINCIBLE IRON MAN HC VOL 02 JUDGE DREDD COMP CASE FILES TP (S&S ED) VOL 04 JUDGE DREDD MEGAZINE #318 KEEP OUR SECRETS BOARD BOOK NARUTO TP VOL 54 SCREAMLAND DEATH O/T PARTY TP STAND TP VOL 02 AMERICAN NIGHTMARES WANDERING SON HC VOL 02 WITCHFINDER TP VOL 02 LOST AND GONE FOREVER X-FORCE HC VOL 02 YOUNG MARVELMAN CLASSIC PREM HC VOL 02

 

What looks good to YOU?

 

-B

Comix Experience 2011 Best Sellers: Books

Books are the majority of what I sell (this year: 56% of sales vs 40% on comics), so let's look at those!

As usual, books on sale (damages, deleted items, overstock, whatever) come in on top -- these are by UNITS, here.

I need to explain #3 -- we had Chad Michael Murray in for a signing, and his legion of women admirers pushed that book up high. We've not sold a single copy since, and I'm not sure if I ever will? We also had Craig Thompson for a signing for HABIBI, but he had less people show up. Philistines!

 

1 Sale Book
2 LOEG III CENTURY #2 1969
3 EVERLAST HC
4 WALKING DEAD TP VOL 14 NO WAY OUT
5 HABIBI GN
6 WALKING DEAD TP VOL 01 DAYS GONE BYE
7 FABLES TP VOL 15 ROSE RED
8 LOVE AND ROCKETS NEW STORIES TP VOL 04
9 WALKING DEAD TP VOL 13 TOO FAR GONE
10 CHEW TP VOL 01
11 Comic Book Guide to the Mission
12 WALKING DEAD TP VOL 02 MILES BEHIND US
13 BLACK HOLE COLLECTED SC NEW PTG
CHEW TP VOL 03 JUST DESSERTS
HARK A VAGRANT HC
SCOTT PILGRIM GN VOL 01 PRECIOUS LITTLE LIFE
17 FABLES TP VOL 14 WITCHES
18 BATMAN DARK KNIGHT RETURNS TP
DAN CLOWES MISTER WONDERFUL LOVE STORY TP
SCENES FROM AN IMPENDING MARRIAGE HC
21 FABLES TP VOL 01 LEGENDS IN EXILE
22 CHEW TP VOL 04 FLAMBE
23 ASTERIOS POLYP GN
BTVS SEASON 8 TP VOL 08 LAST GLEAMING
25 CHEW TP VOL 02 INTERNATIONAL FLAVOR
SCOTT PILGRIM GN VOL 02 VS THE WORLD
V FOR VENDETTA NEW EDITION TP (MR)
WALKING DEAD TP VOL 12 LIFE AMONG THEM
WALKING DEAD TP VOL 15
30 AMAZING SCREW ON HEAD & OTHER CURIOUS OBJECTS HC
BOYS TP VOL 08 HIGHLAND LADDIE
PLANETARY TP BOOK 04 SPACETIME ARCHAEOLOGY
WALKING DEAD TP VOL 09 HERE WE REMAIN
WALKING DEAD TP VOL 10 WHAT WE BECOME
35 BATMAN YEAR ONE DELUXE SC
DAYTRIPPER TP
LOEG III CENTURY #1 1910
LOEG VOL ONE TP (JUL068290)
Y THE LAST MAN TP VOL 01 UNMANNED
40 ALL OVER COFFEE v2: EVERYTHING IS ITS OWN REWARD
INCOGNITO TP
PREACHER TP VOL 01 GONE TO TEXAS NEW EDITION (MAR050489) (MR
43 CATS ARE WEIRD & MORE OBSERVATIONS HC
HELLBOY TP VOL 11 BRIDE OF HELL & OTHERS
ORC STAIN TP VOL 01
PAYING FOR IT HC
R CRUMBS HEROES OF BLUES JAZZ & COUNTRY WITH CD HC
TRANSMETROPOLITAN TP VOL 01 BACK ON THE STREET
WALKING DEAD TP VOL 11 FEAR THE HUNTERS
WATCHMEN TP
51 BATMAN THE KILLING JOKE SPECIAL ED HC
DRINKING AT THE MOVIES SC
WARREN ELLIS CROOKED LITTLE VEIN MMPB
54 ALAN MOORE NEONOMICON TP
CARNET DE VOYAGE
DMZ TP VOL 09 MIA
FABLES TP VOL 02 ANIMAL FARM
INCAL CLASSIC COLLECTION HC
59 ALL STAR SUPERMAN TP VOL 01
BATMAN AND ROBIN TP VOL 01 BATMAN REBORN
BTVS SEASON 8 TP VOL 01 LONG WAY HOME NEW PTG
CRIMINAL TP VOL 01 COWARD (MR)
DMZ TP VOL 01 ON THE GROUND (MAR060383) (MR)
DMZ TP VOL 10 COLLECTIVE PUNISHMENT
ELEPHANTMEN TP VOL 01 WOUNDED ANIMALS REVISED ED
FABLES TP VOL 16 SUPER TEAM
FINDER GN VOL 01 VOICE
FROM HELL TP
GETTING CLOSE
HELLBOY HOUSE OF THE LIVING DEAD HC
MORNING GLORIES TP VOL 01 FOR A BETTER FUTURE
SCALPED TP VOL 07 REZ BLUES
UNWRITTEN TP VOL 03 DEAD MANS KNOCK
ZOMBIE SURVIVAL GUIDE TP (DEC058019)
75 100 BULLETS TP VOL 01 FIRST SHOT LAST CALL
ALL STAR SUPERMAN TP VOL 02
BATMAN THE RETURN OF BRUCE WAYNE DELUXE ED HC
BLACK DYNAMITE SLAVE ISLAND GN
BLACKSAD HC VOL 01
BTVS SEASON 8 TP VOL 07 TWILIGHT
ISLE OF 100000 GRAVES GN
LOGICOMIX GN
SANDMAN TP VOL 01 PRELUDES & NOCTURNES NEW ED
SCOTT PILGRIM GN VOL 06 FINEST HOUR
WALKING DEAD TP VOL 03 SAFETY BEHIND BARS (MR)
WALKING DEAD TP VOL 04 HEARTS DESIRE
Y THE LAST MAN TP VOL 05 RING OF TRUTH (MAY050306) (MR)
Y THE LAST MAN TP VOL 06 GIRL ON GIRL (SEP050317) (MR)
Y THE LAST MAN TP VOL 08 KIMONO DRAGONS (AUG060299) (MR)
Y THE LAST MAN TP VOL 10 WHYS AND WHEREFORES (MAR080241) (MR
91 ALEXANDRO JODOROWSKY SCREAMING PLANET HC
CROSSED 3D GN VOL 01
FABLES TP VOL 03 STORYBOOK LOVE
FABLES TP VOL 13 THE GREAT FABLES CROSSOVER
FREAKANGELS TP VOL 05
HELLBOY TP VOL 02 WAKE THE DEVIL
INCOGNITO TP  VOL 02 BAD INFLUENCES
JACK OF FABLES TP VOL 08 THE FULMINATE BLADE TP
KAFKA GN
LOEG VOL TWO TP (FEB058407)
MOUSE GUARD TP FALL 1152 (JAN083948)
NEMESIS PREM HC
NORTHLANDERS TP VOL 05 METAL
PLANETARY TP VOL 01 ALL OVER THE WORLD AND OTHER STORIES
SANDMAN TP VOL 02 THE DOLLS HOUSE NEW ED
SCOTT PILGRIM GN VOL 03 INFINITE SADNESS
SCOTT PILGRIM GN VOL 04 GETS IT TOGETHER
SUPERGODS WHAT SUN GODS CAN TEACH US ABOUT BEING HUMAN HC
TRANSMETROPOLITAN TP VOL 02 LUST FOR LIFE NEW ED (MR)
WILSON HC
Y THE LAST MAN TP VOL 07 PAPER DOLLS (FEB060341) (MR)
Y THE LAST MAN TP VOL 09 MOTHERLAND (FEB070362) (MR)

 

Sorting this out by dollars instead? Craig wins this round against Chad!

 

1 Sale Book
2 HABIBI GN
3 EVERLAST HC
4 LOEG III CENTURY #2 1969
5 WALKING DEAD TP VOL 14 NO WAY OUT
6 FABLES TP VOL 15 ROSE RED
7 ASTERIOS POLYP GN
8 WALKING DEAD COMPENDIUM TP VOL 01
9 INCAL CLASSIC COLLECTION HC
10 LOVE AND ROCKETS NEW STORIES TP VOL 04
11 BLACK HOLE COLLECTED SC NEW PTG
12 WALKING DEAD TP VOL 13 TOO FAR GONE
13 HARK A VAGRANT HC
14 FABLES TP VOL 14 WITCHES
15 ALL OVER COFFEE v2: EVERYTHING IS ITS OWN REWARD
16 DAN CLOWES MISTER WONDERFUL LOVE STORY TP
17 FROM HELL TP
18 WALKING DEAD TP VOL 01 DAYS GONE BYE
19 Comic Book Guide to the Mission
20 WALKING DEAD TP VOL 02 MILES BEHIND US
21 BLANKETS HC
22 V FOR VENDETTA NEW EDITION TP (MR)
23 PAYING FOR IT HC
24 BLACKSAD HC VOL 01
25 BOYS TP VOL 08 HIGHLAND LADDIE
26 BATMAN DARK KNIGHT RETURNS TP
27 DAYTRIPPER TP
28 CHEW TP VOL 03 JUST DESSERTS
29 BATMAN THE RETURN OF BRUCE WAYNE DELUXE ED HC
30 AMAZING SCREW ON HEAD & OTHER CURIOUS OBJECTS HC
PLANETARY TP BOOK 04 SPACETIME ARCHAEOLOGY
32 R CRUMBS HEROES OF BLUES JAZZ & COUNTRY WITH CD HC
33 BTVS SEASON 8 TP VOL 08 LAST GLEAMING
34 SCOTT PILGRIM GN VOL 01 PRECIOUS LITTLE LIFE
35 INCOGNITO TP
36 HELLBOY TP VOL 11 BRIDE OF HELL & OTHERS
37 WATCHMEN TP
38 CHEW TP VOL 01
39 PREACHER TP VOL 01 GONE TO TEXAS NEW EDITION (MAR050489) (MR
40 WALKING DEAD TP VOL 12 LIFE AMONG THEM
41 FABLES TP VOL 01 LEGENDS IN EXILE
42 SUPERGODS WHAT SUN GODS CAN TEACH US ABOUT BEING HUMAN HC
43 ORC STAIN TP VOL 01
44 BLANKETS GN
45 CHEW TP VOL 04 FLAMBE
46 WALKING DEAD TP VOL 15
WALKING DEAD TP VOL 09 HERE WE REMAIN
WALKING DEAD TP VOL 10 WHAT WE BECOME
49 ALAN MOORE NEONOMICON TP
50 LOGICOMIX GN
51 ALEXANDRO JODOROWSKY SCREAMING PLANET HC
52 BATMAN THE KILLING JOKE SPECIAL ED HC
53 BATMAN YEAR ONE DELUXE SC
54 LOEG VOL ONE TP (JUL068290)
55 ELEPHANTMEN TP VOL 01 WOUNDED ANIMALS REVISED ED
56 CHEW TP VOL 02 INTERNATIONAL FLAVOR
57 Y THE LAST MAN TP VOL 01 UNMANNED
58 BEST AMERICAN COMICS HC 2011
59 COMPLETE PERSEPOLIS TP
60 FINDER GN VOL 01 VOICE
61 WILSON HC
62 TRANSMETROPOLITAN TP VOL 01 BACK ON THE STREET
WALKING DEAD TP VOL 11 FEAR THE HUNTERS
64 SCOTT PILGRIM GN VOL 02 VS THE WORLD
65 SCENES FROM AN IMPENDING MARRIAGE HC
66 SCALPED TP VOL 07 REZ BLUES
67 SANDMAN TP VOL 01 PRELUDES & NOCTURNES NEW ED
68 DRINKING AT THE MOVIES SC
69 BOYS TP VOL 09 BIG RIDE
70 BATMAN NOEL DELUXE EDITION HC
71 FREAKANGELS TP VOL 05
NEMESIS PREM HC
73 SANDMAN TP VOL 02 THE DOLLS HOUSE NEW ED
74 WARREN ELLIS CROOKED LITTLE VEIN MMPB
75 MOUSE GUARD TP FALL 1152 (JAN083948)
76 BTVS SEASON 8 TP VOL 01 LONG WAY HOME NEW PTG
77 CATS ARE WEIRD & MORE OBSERVATIONS HC
78 BTVS SEASON 8 TP VOL 07 TWILIGHT
79 CARNET DE VOYAGE
80 DMZ TP VOL 09 MIA
81 INVISIBLES TP #1 SAY YOU WANT A REVOLUTION
LOCKE & KEY TP VOL 01 WELCOME TO LOVECRAFT
SWAMP THING TP VOL 01 SAGA OF THE SWAMP THING
JIMMY CORRIGAN THE SMARTEST KID ON EARTH SC
85 FABLES TP VOL 13 THE GREAT FABLES CROSSOVER
INCOGNITO TP  VOL 02 BAD INFLUENCES
NORTHLANDERS TP VOL 05 METAL
88 HELLBOY TP VOL 02 WAKE THE DEVIL
89 INVINCIBLE TP VOL 14 VILTRUMITE WAR
90 BATMAN AND ROBIN TP VOL 01 BATMAN REBORN
CRIMINAL TP VOL 01 COWARD (MR)
FABLES TP VOL 16 SUPER TEAM
UNWRITTEN TP VOL 03 DEAD MANS KNOCK
94 LOEG BLACK DOSSIER TP (JUL080193)
95 KOKO BE GOOD GN
96 DMZ TP VOL 10 COLLECTIVE PUNISHMENT
97 HONDO CITY LAW GN
98 FABLES TP VOL 02 ANIMAL FARM
99 ZOMBIE SURVIVAL GUIDE TP (DEC058019)
100 FABLES TP VOL 04 MARCH OF THE WOODEN SOLDIERS

 

Any thoughts?

 

-B

Comix Experience 2011 Best Sellers: Comics

New Year, so how'd the last one do? Let's Find out!

So, here's the list sorted by QUANTITY SOLD.

Yes, comics for 25 cents outsell anything, by a factor of about 10x. Hardly a surprise, I'm sure, though worth noting that I couldn't possibly survive with that as my business model.

Straight-up for a buck comes next, and the generic "back issue"...  Back issues, generically, sold about 50% more units than the best-selling comic.

After that, pretty much a straight-up rout for the DC New 52, with 31 of them placing in the Top 100, yow. Marvel places only a single book in the Top 20. Double yow.

1 Quarter Book - Single
2 Dollar Book
3 Back Issue
4 JUSTICE LEAGUE #1
5 ACTION COMICS #1
6 BATMAN #1
7 Starter Set
8 DETECTIVE COMICS #1
9 WONDER WOMAN #1
10 BATWOMAN #1
11 ACTION COMICS #2
12 SUPERMAN #1
13 BATGIRL #1
14 ANIMAL MAN #1
15 GREEN LANTERN #1
JUSTICE LEAGUE #2
SWAMP THING #1
18 JUSTICE LEAGUE #3
19 FEAR ITSELF #1 (OF 7)
20 AQUAMAN #1
21 ACTION COMICS #3
22 BATMAN AND ROBIN #1
BATMAN THE DARK KNIGHT #1
24 BATMAN #2
25 TEEN TITANS #1
26 ANIMAL MAN #2
27 FLASH #1
FLASHPOINT #1
JUSTICE LEAGUE DARK #1
NIGHTWING #1
31 BATMAN INCORPORATED #3
BATMAN INCORPORATED #4
BATMAN INCORPORATED #5
BATMAN INCORPORATED #6
DETECTIVE COMICS #2
36 ACTION COMICS #4
FEAR ITSELF #2 (OF 7)
38 BATMAN #3
39 BATWOMAN #2
BUFFY VAMPIRE SLAYER #40 LAST GLEAMING PT 5 (OF 5)
41 CATWOMAN #1
SPACEMAN #1 (OF 9)
WALKING DEAD #85
44 FEAR ITSELF #4 (OF 7)
45 WALKING DEAD #86
WALKING DEAD #87
47 KICK-ASS 2 #2
48 FLASHPOINT #5 (OF 5)
XOMBI #1
50 JUSTICE LEAGUE #4
JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL #1
OPTIC NERVE #12
WALKING DEAD #88
54 BATMAN INCORPORATED #7
CRIMINAL LAST OF INNOCENT #1 (OF 4)
FEAR ITSELF #3 (OF 7)
FEAR ITSELF #5 (OF 7)
KICK-ASS 2 #3
59 ANIMAL MAN #3
RED LANTERNS #1
STORMWATCH #1
62 DETECTIVE COMICS #3
GREEN LANTERN #2
64 BATWOMAN #3
DEMON KNIGHTS #1
WALKING DEAD #90
67 GREEN LANTERN NEW GUARDIANS #1
SWAMP THING #2
WALKING DEAD #82
WALKING DEAD #83
WALKING DEAD #84
72 BATMAN INCORPORATED #8
DC UNIVERSE PRESENTS #1
FF #1
FLASHPOINT #2
FRANKENSTEIN AGENT OF SHADE #1
GREEN LANTERN #64
WOLVERINE AND X-MEN #1 XREGG
WONDER WOMAN #2
80 BTVS SEASON 9 FREEFALL #1
SUPERGIRL #1
WALKING DEAD #89
83 BATWING #1
RED HOOD AND THE OUTLAWS #1
UNCANNY X-MEN #1
86 BATMAN AND ROBIN #2
FANTASTIC FOUR #587
FEAR ITSELF #6 (OF 7)
FEAR ITSELF #7 (OF 7)
WALKING DEAD #91
WONDER WOMAN #3
XOMBI #2
93 ANIMAL MAN #4
ULTIMATE COMICS SPIDER-MAN #160 DOSM
WALKING DEAD #80
96 ALL STAR WESTERN #1
BTVS SEASON 9 FREEFALL #2
CRIMINAL LAST OF INNOCENT #2 (OF 4)
FLASHPOINT #3
FLASHPOINT #4 (OF 5)
GARTH ENNIS JENNIFER BLOOD #1
SUPERBOY #1
WALKING DEAD #81

 

Alright, what if we sort it by DOLLARS instead, does anything change?

Well, not a TON, but at least OPTIC NERVE becomes a Top 20 book, then!

 

1 Back Issue
2 Starter Set
3 JUSTICE LEAGUE #1
4 ACTION COMICS #1
5 Quarter Book - Single
6 Dollar Book
7 BATMAN #1
8 ACTION COMICS #2
9 DETECTIVE COMICS #1
10 WONDER WOMAN #1
11 JUSTICE LEAGUE #2
12 JUSTICE LEAGUE #3
13 BATWOMAN #1
14 OPTIC NERVE #12
15 ACTION COMICS #3
16 FEAR ITSELF #1 (OF 7)
17 SUPERMAN #1
18 BATGIRL #1
19 FLASHPOINT #1
20 ANIMAL MAN #1
21 ACTION COMICS #4
FEAR ITSELF #2 (OF 7)
23 GREEN LANTERN #1
24 SWAMP THING #1
25 AQUAMAN #1
26 FLASHPOINT #5 (OF 5)
27 BATMAN AND ROBIN #1
BATMAN THE DARK KNIGHT #1
29 FEAR ITSELF #7 (OF 7)
30 BATMAN #2
31 JUSTICE LEAGUE #4
32 FEAR ITSELF #5 (OF 7)
33 FEAR ITSELF #3 (OF 7)
34 TEEN TITANS #1
35 FEAR ITSELF #4 (OF 7)
36 ANIMAL MAN #2
37 NIGHTWING #1
38 FLASH #1
JUSTICE LEAGUE DARK #1
40 DETECTIVE COMICS #2
41 FLASHPOINT #2
WOLVERINE AND X-MEN #1 XREGG
43 BATMAN INCORPORATED #6
44 FF #1
45 BRIGHTEST DAY #24
46 BATMAN #3
47 CRIMINAL LAST OF INNOCENT #1 (OF 4)
48 UNCANNY X-MEN #1
49 BUFFY VAMPIRE SLAYER #40 LAST GLEAMING PT 5 (OF 5)
50 BATMAN INCORPORATED #4
BATWOMAN #2
52 CATWOMAN #1
53 FEAR ITSELF #6 (OF 7)
54 ULTIMATE COMICS SPIDER-MAN #160 DOSM
55 FANTASTIC FOUR #587
56 BATMAN INCORPORATED #3
57 KICK-ASS 2 #2
58 WALKING DEAD #87
59 WALKING DEAD #86
60 ALL STAR WESTERN #1
61 FLASHPOINT #3
FLASHPOINT #4 (OF 5)
63 XOMBI #1
64 JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL #1
65 BATMAN INCORPORATED #2
66 KICK-ASS 2 #3
67 WALKING DEAD #85
WALKING DEAD #88
69 DAREDEVIL #1
ULTIMATE COMICS SPIDER-MAN #1
71 RED LANTERNS #1
STORMWATCH #1
73 ANIMAL MAN #3
74 BATMAN INCORPORATED #5
75 DETECTIVE COMICS #3
76 GREEN LANTERN #2
77 DEMON KNIGHTS #1
78 BATWOMAN #3
79 ALAN MOORE NEONOMICON #4 (OF 4)
80 GREEN LANTERN NEW GUARDIANS #1
81 ASTONISHING X-MEN #36
82 WALKING DEAD #90
83 SWAMP THING #2
84 BATMAN INCORPORATED #7
85 DC UNIVERSE PRESENTS #1
86 WALKING DEAD #83
87 FRANKENSTEIN AGENT OF SHADE #1
WONDER WOMAN #2
89 BATMAN INCORPORATED #8
90 GARTH ENNIS JENNIFER BLOOD #1
91 GARTH ENNIS JENNIFER BLOOD #2
92 BTVS SEASON 9 FREEFALL #1
SUPERGIRL #1
94 CRIMINAL LAST OF INNOCENT #3 (OF 4)
95 BATWING #1
RED HOOD AND THE OUTLAWS #1
97 WALKING DEAD #89
98 JOE THE BARBARIAN #8 (OF 8)
99 BATMAN AND ROBIN #2
100 WALKING DEAD #82

Either way, this was very much DC's year for comical books -- Marvel is is deep trouble here.

 

Any trends you see, worth commenting on?

-B

Wait, What? Ep. 68.2: Startkicker

Photobucket It's the conclusion of Episode 68 and our last episode for 2011! (Hopefully, it was be as carefree and as easy to find and listen to as part one was an epic tragedy.) Join Graeme McMillan and me on a speedy 75 minute tour of the highlights and lowlands of the year (of which the former is the career of Kate Beaton, whose book is represented above, and of which the latter is the career of, oh, I dunno, me, probably). The Kirby trial outcome! The layoffs at Marvel! Superhero movies! Kickstarter! Watchmen 2! Feigned excitement! And much, much more, of course.

I pray to god the miserable son of a bitch is on iTunes but if not, you can listen to it here, there, and everywhere via the handy link provided below:

Wait, What? Ep. 68.2: Startkicker

We hope you enjoy and plan on joining us for future episodes in 2012.  Either way, however, we wish you for the very best for the new year!

Wait, What? Ep. 68.1: Grist for the Mill(ar)

Photobucket This one had the best of intentions but somehow ended up being more of the accident-at-the-mousetrap-factory variety. Graeme and I started with the idea of doing a year in review podcast and it morphed, as our conversations usually do, into a verbal catalogue of compulsion and fixation.

Oh sure, we start covering events from 2011 like DC's New 52, day and date digital, but ends up being more about the paintings of Sharon Moody (erroneously called Shannon Moody by me for the whole damn podcast!), Christmas with the Swamp Thing and a long analysis of the year's crossover events through the only lens that matters--that of Mark Millar.

But my system crashes partway through the conversation (which you'll be lucky enough to hear), Audacity stripped all the sound out of the exported file (which I only found out after I spent an hour uploading) and we still have Part 2 for you to come--which I look forward to all but stabbing me in my fucking throat, Chucky-style, while I work on it--so, you know. Happy Holidays! And like that.

[NOTE: Turns out the music that plays us out didn't convert into the final mix for some reason?  So even though the episode ends very abruptly, you're not missing anything, we swear.]

In any event, maybe you can find this on iTunes (or iTunes has turned that soundless file into an unstoppable murdering sonic sound file...in which case, I apologize and ask you don't count it as a typical recording should you decide to leave us a review there) or you can listen to our friendly, non-murderous version here:

Wait, What? Ep. 68.1: Grist for the Mill(ar)

Thank you for listening, and for putting up with our sad sonic shenanigans!

Arriving 12/29/11

The final ship week of the year, and it's not a bad one! We do, however, have two ASSHATS OF THE WEEK, in this final shipping week -- first is the loverly *four* different issues of 2000 AD that are shipping to America this week; seriously, I'd rather have a single SKU to have to process if you're going to do that anyway, guys.

The second goes to Marvel comics, and the *two* issues of CAPTAIN AMERICA (#5 & 6) shipping this week, AS WELL AS an issue of CAPTAIN AMERICA & BUCKY.

Please please please please please stop making it harder to sell your comics, publishers!

2000 AD #1759 2000 AD #1760 2000 AD #1761 2000 AD #1762 30 DAYS OF NIGHT ONGOING #3 ALL STAR WESTERN #4 ALPHA FLIGHT #7 AMERICAN VAMPIRE #22 ANGEL & FAITH #5 STEVE MORRIS CVR ANNE RICE SERVANT OF THE BONES #5 (OF 6) ANNIHILATORS EARTHFALL #4 (OF 4) AQUAMAN #4 ARCHIE #628 (ARCHIE MEETS KISS PT 2 ) ARTIFACTS #12 (OF 13) CVR A HORN ASTONISHING X-MEN #45 AVENGERS CHILDRENS CRUSADE #8 (OF 9) AVENGERS SOLO #3 (OF 5) BART SIMPSON COMICS #66 BATMAN THE DARK KNIGHT #4 BLACK PANTHER MOST DANGEROUS MAN ALIVE #527 BLACKHAWKS #4 CAPTAIN AMERICA #5 CAPTAIN AMERICA #6 CAPTAIN AMERICA AND BUCKY #625 CROSSED BADLANDS OPENING SALVO CYCLOPS #7 DC COMICS PRESENTS BATMAN BLAZE OF GLORY #1 DC COMICS PRESENTS BATMAN URBAN LEGENDS #1 DC COMICS PRESENTS ELSEWORLDS 80 PAGE GIANT #1 DC UNIVERSE ONLINE LEGENDS #20 DEADPOOL #48 DMZ #72 DOROTHY AND WIZARD IN OZ #4 (OF 8) DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS #14 FF #13 FLASH #4 FRENEMY OF THE STATE #5 (OF 5) (RES) FURY OF FIRESTORM THE NUCLEAR MEN #4 GAME OF THRONES #4 GEARS OF WAR #21 GREEN LANTERN NEW GUARDIANS #4 HACK SLASH #11 CVR A SEELEY & BADILLA HAUNT #20 I VAMPIRE #4 INCORRUPTIBLE #25 IRON MAN 2.0 #12 JOE HILL THE CAPE #3 (OF 4) JUSTICE LEAGUE DARK #4 KICK-ASS 2 #6  (OF 7) KIRBY GENESIS CAPTAIN VICTORY #2 LEGION SECRET ORIGIN #3 (OF 6) LENORE VOLUME II #4 MICE TEMPLAR VOL 3 #6 MICHAEL AVON OEMING CVR MIGHTY THOR #9 MONOCYTE #2 (OF 4) RED SONJA #61 ROBERT JORDAN WHEEL OF TIME EYE O/T WORLD #18 SAVAGE HAWKMAN #4 SECRET AVENGERS #20 SIMPSONS SUPER SPECTACULAR #14 SONIC THE HEDGEHOG #232 SPACE WARPED #6 (OF 6) SPACEMAN #3 (OF 9) SPIDER-MAN #21 STAR TREK ONGOING #4 STAR WARS CRIMSON EMPIRE III EMPIRE LOST #3 (OF 6) SUPERMAN #4 TEEN TITANS #4 TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES MICRO SERIES #2 MICHELANGELO THE GUILD ZABOO #1 DORKIN CVR TOO MUCH COFFEE MAN #1 FACSIMILE ED ULTIMATE COMICS ULTIMATES #5 ULTIMATE COMICS X-MEN #5 UNCANNY X-MEN #3 XREGB UNWRITTEN #32.5 VENGEANCE #6 (OF 6) VOODOO #4 WARLORD OF MARS #14 WITCH DOCTOR RESUSCITATION ONE SHOT WORLD OF ARCHIE DOUBLE DIGEST #13

Books / Mags / Stuff BETTY & VERONICA BATTLE OF THE BFFS BLACKHAWK GN (REBELLION ED) BROADCAST TV DOODLES OF HENRY FLINT SC CHASE TP DUNGEONS & DRAGONS HC VOL 02 FIRST ENCOUNTERS ESSENTIAL SPIDER-MAN TP VOL 07 NEW ED GENERATION HOPE SCHISM TP HELLBLAZER TP VOL 02 THE DEVIL YOU KNOW NEW ED HOUSE OF MYSTERY TP VOL 07 CONCEPTION JUDGE DREDD MEGAZINE #317 LOBO UNBOUND TP LOUIS - RED LETTER DAY HC NEW ED PREVIEWS #280 JANUARY 2012 (NET) ROOTS OF THE SWAMP THING TP SECRET AVENGERS TP VOL 02 EYES OF DRAGON SHAKY KANES MONSTER TRUCK GN TERRY MOORE SKETCHBOOK VOL 01 HOT GIRLS & COLD FEET TRUE BLOOD LOGO BEER MUG TRUE BLOOD LOGO PINT GLASS X-MEN AGE OF X TP X-MEN LEGACY #260 XREGG X-MEN SCHISM HC

What looks good to YOU?

 

-B

Have A Good One, Everyone!

Season's Greetings to one and all! Had a busy week what with all that festive malarkey and whatnot. Oh yeah, got you a "secret handshake" for Christmas, alright. Self indulgence beyond mortal comprehension follows after the break.

So I noticed this interesting piece by Barry Norman in the 1979 Radio And TV Times Christmas Edition about a film I didn't realise existed:

JACK KIRBY'S THE NEW GODS (Amicus Productions (UK/USA),1975) Directed  by Kevin Connor Screenplay by Harold Pinter Based on the DC Comics creations of Jack Kirby

Cast: Richard Burton (Darkseid) Robert Shaw (Orion) Michael York (Light Ray) Doug McClure (Scott Free) Raquel Welch  (Big Barda) Superman (Robert Mitchum) Caroline Munro (Beautiful Dreamer) Malcolm McDowell (Glorious Godfrey) Peter Cushing (DeSaad) Christopher Lee (Metron) Rod Steiger (Terrible Turpin) Billy Dee Williams (Shilo Norman) Woody Strode (The Black Racer) Peter Cook  (Funky Flashman) Dudley Moore  (House Roy) Peter Ustinov (High Father) Jim Dale (Jimmy Olsen)

Produced by Milton Subotsky & Samuel Z. Arkoff Original Music by Roy Budd Special Effects by Roger Dicken & Derek Meddings

Did You Know? Scott Free was originally to be played by Melvyn Hayes. The hand turning the pages in the latter part of the film belongs to Ridley Scott who only stopped to ask for directions. Richard Burton's scenes were all filmed in front of a backdrop in his local pub while he waited for his pint of Guinness to settle. In order to perfect his Method Rod Steiger had himself blown up. Twice. To this day Malcolm McDowell pretends he wasn't in this film. And he's in Mr. MAGOO.

Goofs. In his introductory scene Darkseid can clearly be seen with a Silk Cut in his hand. Jim Dale's ginger wig moves position from shot to shot. The camera often forgets to move away from Caroline Munro even though the other actors are doing stuff and talking and everything.

About The Film. Almost lost in the tides of history the Amicus production of JACK KIRBY’S THE NEW GODS will “blow” your mind!!! In 1974 Milton Subotsky was approached by Carmine Infantino to bring Jack Kirby’s creations to the silver screen. The kids were wild, crazy and lovin’ in the streets and Infantino thought if he could capture that audience then, perhaps, money might fall from the sky like a rain of dead birds whose hearts had mysteriously all stopped at once.

Most of the talent involved in JK'sNG was British. The British are generally just glad of the chance to get out of the house and are eternally surprised that people pay them for something they’d probably be doing anyway. They tend to work for buttons, basically. This appealed to the budget conscious Subotsky but later bit him on the tailpipe when Pinter left the production in a huff after a contretemps regarding the proper pronunciation of “patronising”. When informed that his name would be removed from the film and that he would receive no payment he remarked, “And I could punch you in the lungs so hard they will fill with your own shit.” Pinter was paid in cash thirty seconds later. In the absence of a screenwriter and a rapidly evaporating budget the decision was made to film Kirby’s tale as it was on the page. Literally.

After the live action conclusion of New Gods #3 the rest of the film consists of the camera panning over actual comic pages in the direction of the action. Nothing is omitted and the only addition is a 20 minute scene in which Big Barda and Beautiful Dreamer wrestle in a rainstorm. “That was for the foreign markets. Yes, um, that’s why that happened.” said Kevin Connor looking a bit shifty. A soundtrack of Roy Budd's characteristically captivating funky warbling and a smattering of Northern Soul songs were added with the dialogue being spoken by the actors as though they were in a radio play. Sound effects were largely provided by a man with an empty sweet tin, some sand and a hammer.This won the film its only Oscar nomination.

The cast themselves had a grand old time by all accounts. Peter Cushing recalled that, "I just can’t speak highly enough of my fellow actors, Dear-heart! They were the very epitome of professionalism! The only real damper on the whole thing was when that scamp Robert Shaw was declared legally dead on three separate occasions due to his love of the grape. And the grain. Oh, and the catering was lovely! Such buns!” Christopher Lee admitted, “It wasn't as bad as when my dog died.” Even Richard Burton effusively praised the film saying, "It paid my Tax Bill for that year and I had some left over for some gaspers, so I did, Boyo! Where's Liz? I feel another marriage coming on!"

Interestingly no one who had ever worked for Marvel Comics was allowed to view the film and this impediment remains in place to this day. This was the result of Jack Kirby suddenly appearing on set like a distressed fireplug in high waisters, he was clearly discombobulated and professed to have received a vision of the future. A vision in which after Kirby's death Stan Lee claimed under oath that Jack Kirby had not created anything and that he, Stan Lee, was merely humouring him all along. Also, that in this bizarre vision Marvel were not paying Kirby or his estate any form of acknowledgement for the creations upon which a multi-billion company was based. Although no one at the time could barely credit such outlandish moral vacuity so intense was Kirby’s belief that Subotsky agreed to his bizarre demand. “He was so upset he almost stopped drawing. We thought the poor guy was going to pop a vein, so we caved.” remembered someone who was probably there at the time.

Critical reception was less than warm to say the least with Alexander Walker declaring in The London Evening Standard, “Oh, for f****’s sake!” while Pauline Kael’s New Yorker review consisted simply of the phrase, "I resented the gift of sight.” Audiences of the time also rejected the film preferring instead some daft film about a rubber shark which eats Robert Shaw. JK'sNG has since found a new life on DVD/Blu-Ray which thanks to technological advances makes it look and sound even worse than ever. This kind of ironic jackassery appeals to hip young people more than you would credit. Trust me, I know. The film was financed primarily by one Janek Noh; about whom nothing is known beyond the fact that he embarked on two later, and even more disastrous, cinematic endeavours; SHAKO! (1985) which led to the Children’s Film Foundation being shut down by the Police and CHAYKIN!: THE MUSICAL! (1993) which was successfully prosecuted for obscenity in Texas. Noh is believed by some to be writing idiocies on other people's web sites, which some might call abusing their hospitality somewhat.

 

So I guess that was a bit like that time your husband turned up drunk  on Christmas Eve and thrust some flowers from the all-night garage at you. And you remembered: it's the thought that counts!

Merry Christmas or what have you!