A post about me!

For the dozen of you that are interested, I'm 1 year without tobacco as of today. Also, if you're in the Bay Area, don't forget that this weekend is the Image Expo, and on Sunday I'll be on a panel with James Sime from Isotope and Steve Anderson from Third Eye comics in Maryland; come to the show and check it out! You can find the full list of programming here.

I should have reviews (what are those?) again tomorrow, and then, I hope, regularly again for a good while again, after we have some frickin' GIANT news in the next day or so...

-B

Wait, What? Ep. 75: Joshua Judges OMAC

[Above:  Not a deliberate shout-out, I'm sure, but we'll take what we can get, of course.]

Thanks for your patience during our mild vacation! In return, we offer you Wait, What? Ep. 75, which features more than two and twenty minutes of Graeme McMillan and me "stealing the air" or "pump[ing] up the volume" or whatever it is you "kids" call it. [Thanks to Joolian for pointing out that should really read "two hours and twenty minutes," damn my eyes!]

Do we talk Robert Kirkman, Tony Moore, and The Walking Dead? Do we, ever! Dare we discuss Gary Friedrich, Ghost Rider and Marvel? Dare, we do! Tire I of answering rhetorical questions? Frankly, yes, but I won't let that get in the way of telling you we also chat about L.J. Smith and The Vampire Diaries; John Rozum, Scott McDaniel, and Static Shock; and James Doohan and William Shatner and Star Trek.

Also, there's Brian Bendis' ideas for the New 52; sales expectations for the Marvel and DC; Marvel's possible reboot and their strategies for Avengers Vs. X-Men; the myth of the Marvel Architects;  Joss Whedon and Buffy The Vampire Slayer; and et cetera, and what have you, and like that.

If you were the type to indulge in auditorial gambols, you may have encountered our gift in the wild autumnal splendor that is iTunes (where nearly-extinct creatures like Ping and DRM still play).  But if not, please take it as it is offered here, with utmost generosity and verbal pomposity:

Wait, What? Ep. 75: Joshua Judges OMAC?

As always, we thank you for listening and hope you enjoy!

Arriving 2/22/12

Next week, if things go like I think they will, this list is going to look kinda different....  Books under the jump!

ALL STAR WESTERN #6 AMERICAN VAMPIRE #24 AQUAMAN #6 ARCHIE #630 (ARCHIE MEETS KISS PT 4 ) ARCHIE & FRIENDS DOUBLE DIGEST #13 ATOMIC ROBO GHOST OF STATION X #5 (OF 5) AVENGERS ACADEMY #26 AVENGERS SOLO #5 (OF 5) B & V FRIENDS DOUBLE DIGEST #222 BART SIMPSON COMICS #68 BATMAN THE DARK KNIGHT #6 BLACKHAWKS #6 BULLETPROOF COFFIN DISINTERRED #2 (OF 6) CAPTAIN AMERICA AND BUCKY #627 CHEW #24 DANGER GIRL REVOLVER #2 (OF 4) DARK HORSE PRESENTS #9 DEADPOOL #51 DEADPOOL MAX 2 #5 DOROTHY AND WIZARD IN OZ #5 (OF 8) FANTASTIC FOUR #603 FLASH #6 FLASH #6 VAR ED FURY OF FIRESTORM THE NUCLEAR MEN #6 GARTH ENNIS JENNIFER BLOOD #9 GFT ALICE IN WONDERLAND #2 GODZILLA LEGENDS #4 (OF 5) GREEN LANTERN NEW GUARDIANS #6 I VAMPIRE #6 INCORRUPTIBLE #27 INFESTATION 2 DUNGEONS & DRAGONS #2 (OF 2) JIM BUTCHER DRESDEN FILES FOOL MOON #5 JUSTICE LEAGUE DARK #6 KNIGHTS OF THE DINNER TABLE #183 MAGNETO NOT A HERO #4 (OF 4) MIGHTY THOR #11 MONDO #1 (OF 3) MORNING GLORIES #16 NEW MUTANTS #38 XREGB NO PLACE LIKE HOME #1 PROPHET #22 RASL #13 RAY #3 (OF 4) RED SONJA #64 RED SONJA WITCHBLADE #1 SAVAGE HAWKMAN #6 SECRET AVENGERS #23 SIXTH GUN #19 SPIDER-MAN #23 STAR WARS DARK TIMES OUT O/T WILDERNESS #4 (OF 5) SUPERMAN #6 TEEN TITANS #6 TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES ONGOING #7 TRANSFORMERS ROBOTS IN DISGUISE ONGOING #2 ULTIMATE COMICS SPIDER-MAN #7 UNCANNY X-FORCE #22 XREGG VENOM #13.3 VOODOO #6 WAR OF THE INDEPENDENTS #2 WOLVERINE AND X-MEN #6 XREGG X-MEN #25 XREGB X-MEN LEGACY #262

Books / Mags / Stuff AFRIKA HC ALTER EGO #107 AMAZING MYSTERIES BILL EVERETT ARCHIVES HC VOL 01 (RES) AMPNEY CRUCIS VILE BODIES TP BATMAN VS BANE TP BETWEEN GEARS TP CAPTAIN AMERICA PRISONER OF WAR TP CHRONICLES OF KULL TP VOL 05 DEAD MEN O/T DEEP & OTHER STORI DC UNIVERSE SECRET ORIGINS HC FEAR ITSELF UNCANNY X-MEN PREM HC GLITZ 2 GO TP HECTOR UMBRA HC HOT MOMS VOL 02 (A) HOUSEWIVES AT PLAY KIDNAPPED (A) IS THAT ALL THERE IS HC KOLOR KLIMAX NORDIC COMICS NOW GN LONG DAY OF MR JAMES TEACHER HC MAD MAGAZINE #514 MARVEL ADVENTURES SPIDER-MAN TANGLED WEB DIGEST TP NAOKI URASAWA 20TH CENTURY BOYS GN VOL 19 NEAR DEATH TP VOL 01 NIGHT O/T LIVING DEAD TP VOL 03 PHOENIX WITHOUT ASHES TP POWERS PREM HC VOL 04 SUPERGROUP SANDMAN TP VOL 08 WORLDS END NEW ED STAR WARS JEDI VOL 01 DARK SIDE TP SUPERIOR PREM HC TORSO GN HC VIDEO WATCHDOG #166 WALLY WOOD EC STORIES ARTIST ED HC (NET)

What looks good to YOU?

-B

"...Until You Flood Me In A Milky Way of Pleasure!" Comics! Sometimes I Spend The Weekend At Bernet’s!

And then I talk about some European comics illustrated by Jordi Bernet and the room gets blue quite quick. It’s not an appealing prospect I know so: Contains traces of adult subjects. NSFW. Danger, Will Robinson! DANGER! For the sake of The Children, turn back NOW!

(This being The Internet I’m sure this will work out just great but just in case: I believe you’ll be able to visit me on Wednesdays but they will frisk you and no physical contact will be allowed. I may also be sedated but don’t worry it’ll be for my own good. Bring cigarettes.)

BERNET Edited by Manuel Auad Introduction by Will Eisner Foreword by Joe Kubert Art by Jordi Bernet Words by various European writers (Auad Publishing, 2003, $24.95, B/W)

This handsome book is like one of those dinners where everyone dresses in tux’n’tails and one by one steps up to the podium to talk about how swell the guy at the front table is. Over here that usually happens when someone's dead but Europe values its artists so this was published while Jordi Bernet was still alive. Which he still is unless I missed something.  These celebratory text pieces punctuate the visually splendid stories, sketches, spot illos., advertisements and book covers reproduced here in a valiant attempt to suggest the massive talent whose name is on the front.

Now, I know as much about Spanish comics as they do about me but on this evidence they are very varied. The full stories reprinted here cover cowboys, war, crime, sword & sorcery fantasy, smutty gag strips, sci-fi and each of these has either a horrific or comical aspect which points to a healthy disrespect for conventions. There’s one page here with Batman on and that’s from the U.S. BATMAN:BLACK&WHITE series (words: Howard Victor Chaykin). just in case a super-hero fan wandered in by mistake and was looking for something familiar to cling on to. Truly, all comers are catered for here. If you're looking for an "in" on the whole Bernet thing this book is the best place to start and if you just like great comic art you should be halfway to your LCS already.

That’s Jordi Bernet up there. Isn't he just the cutest little rascal! That picture is taken from the brief bio of The Bernet at the front of the book. After some facts it pretty much settles into a list of what comics he's drawn because apparently sitting in a chair drawing isn't really the stuff of high adventure. It still manages to be revealing about the great man despite this. As we can see Jordi Bernet grew up when people dressed their kids like it was Awesome Time all of the time. Or at least kids dressed more like grown-ups than grown ups do today. (Ha! You hated that!) When Jordi Bernet was 15 his father, one Jorge Bernet  a successful newspaper cartoonist, died and the the bereaved child took over the strip in order to support his family. This tells us three things; unlike me at 15 Jordi Bernet had better things to do than stick pictures of Sybil Danning inside his underpants with nature’s solvent, child labour laws in Spain were quite lax and Jordi Bernet certainly had the motivation and talent to become great. Just how great he became is the whole point of this book as is some idea of how long it took him to become so. Turns out it didn't take him long at all. There’s work here from 1966 which is good and then he just gets better and better. Once he reaches a certain point (tough to pinpoint but I'll say the late '70s?) though the improvements take longer and are harder to see because by that point he is Bernet and improving on perfection is tougher work than achieving it.

Bernet is great and I think I can demonstrate that best by talking about hair. Obviously. Now, hair in most comics is just stuff on somebody's head. Sometimes it's black, sometimes it's not. On the whole about as much attention is paid to hair as there is hair on my bonce (not a lot). When you notice how Bernet draws hair you notice how little care most artists take. I love the way Bernet draws hair. Bernet understands that there are different kinds of hair. There isn’t just Woman hair (long) and Man hair (short). Hair has different textures and qualities depending on the head upon which it resides. If you use products on it hair appears different again. Sometimes Bernet will give his women’s hair a great bold holding line with just the tiniest touch of detailing meant to represent it being blow-dried and lacquered.You don't see that attention to detail a lot.

When people sweat their hair gets spiky and sticks up and out, when people are active their hair is active too, and, yes, less so if it is lacquered and blow-dried. There is a picture in the book (p.16) of Bernet, Frank Robbins and Bertha Robbins on a beach which might as well be captioned “When Comb-overs Were King!” Bernet knows that it's important to capture what is important about life if you are going to try and represent it on the page. Hair is important and Bernet is good at the hair but he’s good at everything else. Bernet’s drapery, lighting and staging are all fantastic, informed by his decades of experience. He might be able to just toss that stuff off now but as I’m sure someone more intelligent commented about someone else; that particular picture didn't take him 5 minutes to draw it took him decades plus the five minutes. (N.B. If someone knows the quote, who it's from and who it's about let me know and I'll edit it in so it looks like I actually worked on this thing properly) Bernet’s great. Don't get me started on his dry brushing.

Bernet’s realism is concrete enough to apprehend the realistic qualities of the worlds he builds but also elastic enough to accommodate cartoony exaggeration without undermining the ever important verisimilitude. But Bernet never gets bogged down in detail. He manages to solve the problem of continuity which (generalisation) plagues European artists. This is a different continuity problem to the one which plagues American genre comics. It isn't the one about how every time I see Luke Cage the seedy vision of him having bum fun with Jessica Jones rears up like a terrible recovered memory. No, the European continuity problem involves the continuity from panel to panel. Bernet gives just enough detail to convince but not so much detail that the eye stops and derails the viewing momentum. But then again Bernet’s learned from the best, which of course means he learned from Alex Toth amongst others. Bernet’s kineticism, inventive staging and just damn good storytelling are very reminiscent of Toth. There’s a TORPEDO sequence atop a half constructed building ("I Spit On Your Cards" ,p.83-92) and a whole story involving a plane ("Number One Joe", p.150-154) which are so Toth-heavy the influence is undeniable. It’s still just an influence though, strong as it is, Bernet’s no copyist; he takes the influence and makes it work with his own talent to produce better work. No, calm down, I'm not saying he's better than Toth I'm saying he's better than he would otherwise be for having studied Toth.

Bernet probably had to go out of his way to study American artists like Toth but he certainly never had to go out of his way to study America. Because America is everywhere. Being Spanish and thus lacking a common language Bernet’s impressions of America naturally resort to the primarily visual. And of course his visuals of America are those America provides in the form of its entertainments. Bernet’s America-set work gives you back a reflection of the reflection of America. He sells you back your (you Americans that is) own dream and improves it while he’s at it. Western, crime, sci-fi are all here, all of them set in America, which is The Dream America all we non-Americans mistake for the reality. Well they’re set in America unless there are different parts of Spain that look like America at various points in history. I don’t know I've never been.

So good, so fine are Bernet’s individual panels that he can produce work for advertising and book covers that look exactly like panels pulled from a narrative and they still work as individual illustrations. Bernet is able to pick the precise frozen moment in time to capture all the information required of a scene. In a comic narrative that’s skillful enough but to pick the exact moment when Jim Thompson’s Savage Night turns into a book that is going to eternally squat in the dark corners of your mind without actually giving anything away is either genius or chance at work. I'll give you some help; it isn't chance where Bernet's concerned.

Ah, Europe with your sex and your violence, your sexy violence and your violent sex. Now it’s probably in all our interests if I ignore these aspects, yes, that would certainly be healthy but why deny myself the delightful opportunity to be labelled a misogynist or have someone wish that I die in a fire. Ah, Internet. Oh, Europe. Ah. Oh. Ah. Oh. Ohohoh. Ah. O. ! So violence first. Everyone loves violence in their entertainment but not everyone loves violent violence. On these Euro-pages, violence happens a lot just as in American genre comics but although sometimes it’s no less stylized it is less fetishised. Violence in American genre comics is pretty much just presented as action.

Which makes sense as they started out as children’s entertainments and, despite what insecure adults who spend their lives writing about people in pajamas hitting each other (for reasons!) would wish you to think, this largely remains the case. Over in Europe, however they appear to have been producing comics material aimed at a wide range of ages since, well, since they started. As a result in European comics, certainly these European comics at least, violence remains fanged and retains its tang. Unlike most American genre comics which are content to provide nothing more challenging than a gummy nip. Which may be why American genre comics are more comfortable with representations of violence than of sex.

And, yes, there is some sexy stuff in this book. Again, like the violence, it’s a very European sexiness. Looking at the sexy stuff, mostly pin-ups and sketches but some of the stories have “mature” encounters also, here I think it’s presented honestly and openly. There’s just a real pleasure in the human form being communicated by Bernet’s lines on paper and that’s a nice thing I think. I believe there’s a very real difference between a drawing which says, isn’t that nice? and when it is saying hurr, hurr, boobz! One is healthy and one is just bloody tiresome. Bernet’s gaze come across as lusty rather than leering. Sometimes everyone’s two favourite subjects collide and result in a subject very few people enjoy; sexual violence. But don't worry because there is male on male sexual violence as well as the usual sort so at least they don't play favourites over in that there Europe. Sex and violence, they seem to nonchalantly inform you, are just parts of life’s sick pageant; so it’s all grist for the mill. I don't think European comics' attitudes to these areas is condoning or endorsing anything horrible. At worst it may just be reflecting aspects of our lives we might want to examine. You don't usually solve a problem by ignoring it after all.

That's all in the general though. Here's some specific Bernet books containing either sex, violence or sexy violence:

THE BEST OF JORDI BERNET'S CLARA Drawn by Jordi Bernet , written by Carlos Trillo and Eduardo Maicas (Big Wow Art and Auad Publishing, 2006, $24.95)

This is a lovely volume that contains a selection of strips from the long running (1992 -?) strip Clara de Noche. These are three-pagers that explore the lighter side of working in the sex industry as we follow the impossibly attractive Clara on her day to day business and learn to laugh with people selling their bodies like bags of crisps. It's is cheeky fun presented in a looser cartoony style; it’s very Sergio Aragones so it’s no surprise he’s a fan. Even though there are plenty of panels of people at it at no point does it ever look anything less than cute or at least amusing. There’s a sense of humour about the whole sex thing; a vigorous acceptance of the ridiculousness of the whole business. The fact that Clara has a kid might seem to be a tonal mis-step but at least it indicates an attempt to deal with sex-workers on human terms rather than as robotic orgasm dispensers. Okay, the actual jokes aren't that hot but, y’know, senses of humour are very different from person to person never mind between countries. Mostly it's humour about what utter tools men are. Which is fair enough.

According to the informative text in the book some people got offended by the kid, but they were probably just upset that they'd have to consider a streetwalker as a mother too, possibly even as a human being, and that might ruin their jollies next time they visited one. I don't know.  I don’t think the actual contents would upset anyone unless they were actually gynophobic or just really poor company to be in generally. Clara’s pretty healthy, I think. Sure, she looks like a straight male fantasy made, er, ink but she does have a personality and a range of emotions far beyond the blow up dolls of North American genre fiction’s female characters. Underneath the unspectacular humour there’s some good character work but I think the best joke is that an unsuspecting reader might be crouched over it enjoying themselves only to have their quiet moment of self satisfaction derailed by a sad eyed kid bemoaning the fact his mother is a prostitute. Clara is titillating stuff with more sensitivity and empathy than you'd expect from the premise. It's a tricky one to pull of but they've got Bernet and Bernet? Bernet makes it look easy.

CHICA Vol.1 and 2. Drawn by Jordi Bernet, written by Carlos Trillo (Eurotica, $10.95 ea)

Chica on the other hand is quite clearly a spank mag so to expect it to be anything else would be foolish but, astonishingly, it turns out sometimes fools win because Chica is also an exciting period piece adventure strip. It starts out circa 1929 and proceeds to graphically display the misadventures of our lusty lady with the lust for life whose lust perpetually saves her life. The actual adventure story is pretty engaging and, excuse me while I put on my tall buckled hat, the bits where people start sticking bits of themselves into each other just irritated me by interrupting the narrative. But, as I say this material is for those who enjoy feeling their pants move around like a small warm animal is slowly coming awake in them as they read. Actually that’s being coy, this is definitely for those who prefer to combine friction with fiction. It’s also quite straight stuff there’s plenty of ladies who like ladies because straight men like ladies who like ladies (but really like men) and not a lot of men who like men and when there are this is usually used for comic effect; because straight men also like men liking men dressed as ladies but only if it is a mistake. There’s no poo or wee involved and it’s clearly just nonsense designed to get a reaction; the reaction porn requires you to have. Yes, that one. So I didn't have a problem with it, really. It’s porn so that’s what it does. It’s nice that it bothers to do something else as well.Bernet doesn't slack a jot, this is as good as his (excellent) work on Torpedo. It's just that amongst all the fantastically accomplished and immersive art there's a lot of genitals and people making monkey noises. I'd attempt to convince you it's worth reading just for the art but it'd sound like I'm the kind of guy who buys Razzle for the articles.

Now, whether it is crude, exploitative, misogynistic or sleazy that’s purely due to the response of the reader. The response of the reader is neither right nor wrong but it is purely the response of that individual reader. The stuff you’re responding to is just the facts, Ma’am. Or, just the f*cks, ma’am, anyway. And the fact is that some stuff is just sexy and how you react to that is on your head. Or in your head. In the case of this stuff you need to be prepared to be responsible for your own reactions. Porn is a problematic thing and this is porn so don’t bother with it if you’re going to have problems with it. Otherwise have at it, but remember; when there’s just dust coming out it’s probably time to stop. I’m a professional so don’t try this at home unless you want to end up with stacks of soggy paper in your wet right hand (Ding! Ding! WhooOOOOooo!). That’s right, I’m a professional idiot. I've heard shame is a natural part of porn but there’s nothing shameful about Bernet’s work here and the only real shame is that the fact it is porn will prevent people from appreciating his usual technical excellence, period detail and smooth storytelling. And dry brushing.

So, there's some comics adorned by Jordi Bernet's art. I wouldn't have read them had they not been but after reading them I think the least I can say is that it’s to the benefit of the entire comics medium and its audience that Jordi Bernet has graced comics with his majestic talents. Talents which are on display in each of these volumes, talents large enough to encompass a wide range of genres and styles and large enough again to meet each of these challenges and both defy and exceed expectations. Judging by the stuff on these pages Jordi Bernet isn't really a comic book artist he’s an Artist. His presence in comics elevates the entire medium and as such he, his work and all these book are EXCELLENT! Yes, even the ones with tits and dicks in.

Have a good weekend everyone and remember to read some COMICS!

(Christ, that took some doing. I might have next week off.)

Wait, What? There's No Wait, What? This Week?

Yes, well.  Tiny vacations were taken last week (little itsy-bitsy ones!) and it was pretty darn pleasant, I gotta say. However, this means Graeme and I didn't record last week, which means I didn't edit yesterday, which means no podcast today.  (Why this means I have to somehow map out the entire production process for you, I'm not sure.  Obviously, the mini-cation didn't help my ability to vamp awkwardly.)

Which isn't to say we don't have some great Wait, What? related content for you anyway.  For example, check out this Portlandia video below for a very compelling cameo (right around the 1:03) mark:

And! After the jump!  Kirby tattoos!

Also worth noting are these great tattoos my pal and friend of the program Ren S. passed along. They're the tats of his friend Dr. Metropolis, who may or may not be the author of this fine book. I'm such a fan of Kirby (and especially Kirby at Marvel), I had to post these:

My thanks to Ren and the good Doctor for showing this very amazing labor of love.  Now if someone wants to come forward with their OMAC tattoos and make my life more-or-less complete...

Next week:  A Podcast!  Probably! See you then!

Arriving 2/15/2012

The worst part about leaving town is coming back and having to catch up -- been running at 100 MPH this morning, and still desperately behind schedule....

ACTIVITY #3 AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #679.1 ANITA BLAKE CIRCUS DAMNED SCOUNDREL #4 (OF 5) ARMY OF DARKNESS ONGOING #1 AVENGERS #22 AVENGING SPIDER-MAN #4 BATMAN #6 BETTY & VERONICA #258 BIRDS OF PREY #6 BLUE BEETLE #6 BPRD HELL ON EARTH LONG DEATH #1 CAPTAIN ATOM #6 CATWOMAN #6 DAREDEVIL #9 DARK TOWER GUNSLINGER WAY STATION #3 (OF 5) DARKNESS #99 CVR A HAUN DC UNIVERSE ONLINE LEGENDS #23 DC UNIVERSE PRESENTS #6 DUNGEONS & DRAGONS DRIZZT #5 (OF 5) FABLES #114 FEAR ITSELF FEARLESS #9 (OF 12) FEMALE FORCE CHER ONE SHOT FLASH GORDON ZEITGEIST #3 FORMIC WARS SILENT STRIKE #3 (OF 5) GENERATION HOPE #16 XREGB GHOSTBUSTERS ONGOING #6 GLAMOURPUSS #23 GLORY #23 CAMPBELL CVR GODZILLA KINGDOM OF MONSTERS #12 GREEN LANTERN CORPS #6 HELLBLAZER #288 INFESTATION 2 DUNGEONS & DRAGONS #1 (OF 2) INFESTATION 2 TRANSFORMERS #2 (OF 2) INVINCIBLE IRON MAN #513 JUGHEADS DOUBLE DIGEST #178 LEGION OF SUPER HEROES #6 LIFE WITH ARCHIE #17 MISADVENTURES OF ADAM WEST ONGOING #1 MORIARTY #9 MY GREATEST ADVENTURE #5 (OF 6) NEW AVENGERS #21 NIGHTWING #6 PETER PANZERFAUST #1 PLANET OF THE APES #11 RED HOOD AND THE OUTLAWS #6 RICHIE RICH GEMS #44 ROBERT JORDAN WHEEL OF TIME EYE O/T WORLD #21 ROGER LANGRIDGES SNARKED #5 SIMPSONS COMICS #187 SONIC UNIVERSE #37 STAR TREK LEGION OF SUPERHEROES #5 (OF 6) STAR WARS DAWN O/T JEDI FORCE STORM #1 STEPHEN KING JOE HILL ROAD RAGE #1 (OF 4) SUPER DINOSAUR #8 SUPERGIRL #6 THUNDERBOLTS #170 TRANSFORMERS MORE THAN MEETS EYE ONGOING #2 ULTIMATE COMICS X-MEN #7 UNCANNY X-MEN #7 VENOM #13.2 WAREHOUSE 13 #4 WARLORD OF MARS DEJAH THORIS #10 WASTELAND #34 WINTER SOLDIER #2 WITCHBLADE #153 WOLVERINE #301 WONDER WOMAN #6 X-FACTOR #232 XREGG YOUNG JUSTICE #13

Books / Mags / Stuff ASTONISHING X-MEN WHEDON CASSADAY ULT COLL TP BOOK 01 ATHOS IN AMERICA HC BAKUMAN TP VOL 09 BLEACH TP VOL 38 COMICS ON TRIAL SC VOL 03 KIRBY VS DISNEY MARVEL DEADMAN TP VOL 02 FABLES DELUXE EDITION HC VOL 04 G FAN #98 HELLBLAZER PHANTOM PAINS TP JACK AVARICE IS THE COURIER TP LOW MOON HC (NEW PTG) (O/A) MADWOMAN O/T SACRED HEART GN MARVEL ZOMBIES SUPREME TP MOONIE VS. PHOBIA SPIDER QUEEN TP PIGS TP VOL 01 HELLO CRUEL WORLD POKEMON ADVENTURES PLATINUM GN VOL 04 SONIC UNIVERSE TP VOL 02 30 YEARS LATER STAND NIGHT HAS COME PREM HC STAR TREK CLASSICS TP VOL 2 ENEMY UNSEEN ULT COMICS SPIDER-MAN BY BENDIS PREM HC VOL 01 UNCANNY X-FORCE TP VOL 02 DEATHLOK NATION VENGEANCE HC WHISPERS IN THE WALLS GN X-FORCE NECROSHA TP ZOMBIE RECOGNITION GUIDE GN

What looks good to YOU?

-B

Some small notes RE: DC (& Digital) from this year's ComicsPRO meeting

I'm just back from Dallas and the 2012 ComicsPRO meeting. I forgot that the laptop didn't have any of the log-in info for the Savage Critic site, and I forgot to write it all down, so, gr to that! I have an entire Tilting column that I'm going to write which is sort of kind of "about" the meeting (but not really, since that won't be for three more weeks, and then we're talking about the past, which no one ever likes!), but I don't think I'll have any room there for any of this stuff.

I wrote these all down on scraps of paper, but I did ask that I can report them... but I might have made a transcription error somewhere here. If so, I trust someone from DC will send me an email!

• DC's John Rood, on digital: "We were surprised to find out that the conversation we're having about digital is about aiding physical (format) growth, NOT managing physical decline; this is utterly different than any other media's results" (Actually, that clause after the semi-colon might be my own thought, and not a quote, I can't quite tell from how I wrote it down. A reporter I am not!)

This is important stuff, and I think it changes the conversation completely.

• The redemption rate on the combo pack for the digital codes in JUSTICE LEAGUE? It was just 20% on issue #1, and it has dropped to just 10% (on #4 or #5, I don't think was 100% clear) -- it appears that DM consumers bought those AS COLLECTIBLE VARIANT COVERS, rather than because they wanted a digital copy!!!

I also have a note here that there were 15k combo packs for #1, and it's down to 5k now (so, actually, those might be semi-legitimately rare covers)

• The single best sales day for day-and-date DC digital comics has been and continues to be the first Wednesday of release; when the price drops by a dollar there's a teeny spike in velocity  -- evidently it is the 10th best sales day (Is that "on average" or for a specific title? I don't think that was clarified) -- but not any kind of a huge surge; this would seem to indicate that digital buyers are just fine paying the full print price, so that they can be "part of the conversation" at initial release.

I, for one, think that IF the "99 cents!" crowd were even CLOSE to correct, that $1.99 day would be the strongest day of release. It isn't. It's #10. You get what your behavior indicates.

"New" comics will never been 99 cents on an ongoing basis, ever, if you ask me -- it would just be leaving money on the table; and it means you can never do anything to stimulate sales by putting material ON SALE!

• It was indicated that New 52 digital books were remarkably consistent and in parity with their print brethren -- drops in sales of print were mirrored in similar proportions in digital. They gave us an average percentage-of-print for digital, but I lost the piece of paper I wrote that on (I told you I suck!), so I can't remember if it was average across the board or on a specific title, or, really what the exact number was. It was very low, however -- I want to say somewhere between 10 and 15 %.

• DC is actually going to release the full results of the Nielsen data, generally. Next week or something -- they showed us slides, and some of that has been reported anecdotally, but we were assured of a FULL release of ALL data to ALL retailers, not just ComicsPRO.

Which means everyone in the world is going to see it soon.

This is AWESOME on DC's part; and when it happens, all you internet pundits should try really hard to NOT be assholes about the data points, and, y'know, maybe THANK THEM for sharing something very very expensive, instead of complaining about things you don't like about it.

(I know, I know: "good luck with that")

FURTHERMORE, DC has every plan to continue to FOLLOW UP on the surveys with more surveys -- this is NOT a one-shot thing. DC flew two Nielsen employees to the ComicsPRO meeting to help gather opinions about what the next questions should include; that should indicate that they were pretty serious.

Outside of DC, most of the digital points were seconded by every other publisher in attendance

That's what I have for you today; time to try and stuff my leaking brain back into my ears...

-B

Big Numbers: Brian's Tilting... on the 2011 Bookscan Numbers at CBR

Hey, everyone.  Since Brian is off doing what Brian does best--pestering comic book publishers for hard data--(and let's face it, that isn't very pretty), he asked me to give all y'all a link to his latest Tilting at Windmills over at CBR.  It's his annual review of the Bookscan numbers which I think makes it even more of a look-see than usual. This is the ninth time Hibbs has sat down and crunched numbers of the Bookscan report (the sixth time he's looked at *all* the numbers for the year) and, as always, the results are fascinating, terrifying, and stultifying all at once.  This year's report runs approximately 15,000 words which is...pretty god-damned daunting, so my brain always breaks when I start thinking about what went into writing it, separate and apart from all the sorting, adding, and comparison-making.

I know in the past Bri has taken some heat from any number of crazy judgments he made in the past and I think this column may be one his least biased Bookscan reviews ever.  He does present an unending stream of interesting trivia--if you ever wanted to know approximately how many copies of Walking Dead were sold through Bookscan dealers last year (a fuckton) or how many books Geoff John placed in the Top 750 titles, this is the column for you--and asks some pretty challenging questions without presuming to know the answers.  Like Hibbs, I always find myself hoping someone takes him up on his challenge to sort the data themselves and see what conclusions they can draw.

And, as always, feel free to leave comments and questions here if you don't want to do it over there.

"It Relates To Justice!" Comics! Sometimes The King Did 'em!

Jack Kirby (28 August 1917 - 6th February 1994).The King of Comics.

Actually, off-panel speaker, I was thinking more of Jack Kirby. Because on 6th February 1994 Jack Kirby died so on 6th February 2012 I read this comic and, later than anticipated because I got distracted, I posted these words about it and about Jack Kirby. Or as he is known 'round here "The King."

1^ST ISSUE SPECIAL Vol.1 #5 “MANHUNTER” By Jack Kirby & D. Bruce Berry DC Comics, $0.25 (Aug 1975)

This comic was published by DC Comics in 1975. Also in 1975 Jack Kirby returned to Marvel. When he was creating this comic The King must have known he was on the way out from DC. He must have known what was coming. He must have felt awful. The hideous knowledge that he had to return to where he had once fled from must have been eating him up. But to dwell on his private pain would be unbecoming and I mention it only to say that it is likely that when this comic was created Jack Kirby was probably not in a Good Place.

Looking at the comic it’s easy to see that The King’s heart isn't in it. The cover is oddly un-dynamic, unsettlingly un-Kirby, and on a page turn reveals itself to be a flipped and recoloured reworking of the splash page. The inking is by D. Bruce Berry, who is no Vince Colletta but neither is he Mike Royer. The character Manhunter is a reinvention of an old character The King and Joe Simon had already reinvented in 1942. There are only two fight scenes, only a modicum of Kirby-tech and just a smattering of crackle. It doesn't look like his heart is in this one at all.

Reading the comic it’s obvious that The King’s Heart (capital H) is on every page. D. Bruce Berry dispenses with his often weak line and achieves an almost Royer-esque level of inky excellence. It’s a great performance. After all the Top Ten Jack Kirby inkers are: Mike Royer. All ten of them. So raising your game that high is no small thing, D. Bruce Berry. The King seizes on his old re-invention and breathes life and energy into it; life and energy fuelled by his own inner pain. The fighting, Kirby-tech and krackling are back-benched so as not to distract from the message he needs to impart. And the message? What message could The King want to send the world as once again he turned back to that black maw? I think The King could be forgiven if the comic were an angry howl of despair. We need not forgive The King for it is, in fact, an acknowledgment of life’s imperfections yet also an optimistic call to arms. No, it is not The King that needs forgiving.

Yes, The King’s Heart is on every page of this comic. Listen now and hear it beat:

It begins with severed heads taunting the hero as he descends to confront "The Chopper". So far so standard but the uncanny weirdness on display is mere prologue. The Timeless Fight between Good and Evil enacted one more time according to all the old familiar rules is here displayed in all The King’s mastery. But things are different when the dust settles. Manhunter has won but Manhunter is revealed to be old and near his end. Who will hunt the men who seek to evade Justice when Manhunter is gone? Though the man fails the cause must continue.  For Manhunter is a hunter of men but he is also a hunter who is a man. And in the end all men fail before Time. All men fall before Time. Even Kings for Kings are also mortal. Manhunter embodies mortality and fear for the future; fear for those who will survive us. (B-Dum! Hear The King’s Heart beat.)

While Manhunter ages and frets Mark Shaw, Public Defender, is finding out that sometimes the system fails the people it’s designed to protect. Mark Shaw, Public Defender, is growing up but Mark Shaw, Public Defender, is not giving up. As luck would have it Mark Shaw, Public Defender, has an ex-archaeologist uncle who enjoys wearing dressing gowns during the day and possesses a collection of arcane and mysterious objects. Some of these pertain to the “Shan” who, so it is said, wore the “Face of The Manhunter” to battle injustices in times past. Mark Shaw, Public Defender, who is beginning to suspect injustice is in fact Timeless, contacts the “Shan” via a combination of a lion medallion and good timing because it so happens that the “Shan” are in when he calls. They are also glad to accept his call. The keen reader may have picked up on a few unlikely coincidences by this point in the comic but these are there for a reason. What appear to be unlikely coincidences are in fact manifestations of Fate and, we are repeatedly told, “Fate is KIND!” The Salvation of the future will come from the Young. And there will be Salvation. (B-Dumba-Dum! Hear The King’s Heart beat!)

More things happen and they are the things you expect and they happen much as you expect but what is of importance has already happened. An angry man, a wounded man, a man returning to the Trap his Gift has condemned him to has spoken in the language that has never failed him (the language of Comics; his Gift, his Trap) and spoken of the thing that has never failed him, that will never fail him; Hope. Hope in us. Because, and I may have mentioned this, Jack Kirby NEVER gave up on us.

And then, lo,  an editorial page on which The King speaks so clearly, so plainly it is as though he is there before us, resplendent in his finery (the high-waisters hoisted high, the tank top and short sleeve shirt combo, comfy brogues perchance) his perma-furrowed brow inclined as he speaks from the Heart. Speaking words from The Past to be carried into The Future:

On 6^th February 1994 Jack Kirby’s mortal heart beat its last beat. On 6^th February 2012 I read this comic and heard his creative Heart beat again. A Heart beating like Thunder. A Heart beating for Justice. A Heart beating for “the little guy”. As long as there are people there will be Injustice. But Jack Kirby knew that as long as there are people there will also be Justice. And I know that as long as there are Kirby Comics the Heart of Jack Kirby will always be beating. Beating for us. Because Jack Kirby, and I may have mentioned this before, NEVER gave up on us. And because of Comics Jack Kirby's Heart will never be still and because of this miracle Jack Kirby never will give up on us.

Which is why Jack Kirby remains EXCELLENT!

Have a good weekend and remember the pleasure of Comics!

Wait, What? Ep. 74: Who Before Watches the Before Watchmen?

I hope you have your calendar cleared until 2014, because that's how long it's going to take before Graeme and I get to answering all your questions from this thread.

Honestly, how were we to know Before Watchmen was going to launched the day before we were scheduled to talk?  As the astute listener may note, we were pretty reluctant to launch into the topic and how clearly tried to get it out of our system beforehand...but like one of those county fair snacks gone bad, it keeps finding new and horrible ways to re-surge and expel itself.

So join us, won't you, for Wait, What? Ep. 74?  The first eighty minutes is Graeme and I talking Watchmen, Before Watchmen, Multiversity, Darwyn Cooke, Amanda Conner, Len Wein, John Higgins, Dave Gibbons and the mighty sleeveless one himself, Alan Moore.

Then for the next fifty or so, we answer your questions.  Five of them.  But in the course of doing so, we also manage to gas on about Batman: Leviathan, Mike Baron and Steve Rude's Nexus, Jack Kirby's Machine Man, books we regret recommending, The Drops of God, Earth X, Fantastic Four, Micronauts, Chris Claremont's last storyline on Uncanny X-Men, the Image anniversary, and more.

An infernal pact was made and sanctified with waffles to bring you the latest episode on iTunes, but an emergent loophole allowed us to also share it with you here and now:

Wait, What? Ep. 74: Who Befores Watches The Before Watchmen?

We hope you enjoy, and as always, thanks for listening!

Arriving 2/8/2012

Something for everyone this week! 2000 AD #1764 ADVENTURE TIME #1 ALL NEW BATMAN THE BRAVE AND THE BOLD #16 ARCHIE DOUBLE DIGEST #226 ARTIFACTS #14 BATGIRL #6 BATMAN AND ROBIN #6 BATTLE SCARS #4 (OF 6) BATWOMAN #6 BERLIN #18 BETTY & VERONICA DOUBLE DIGEST #198 BLACK PANTHER MOST DANGEROUS MAN ALIVE #529 BLUE ESTATE #9 BTVS SEASON 9 FREEFALL #6 CAPTAIN AMERICA #8 CARNAGE USA #3 (OF 5) CAVEWOMAN FEEDING GROUNDS #1 CONAN THE BARBARIAN #1 DAKEN DARK WOLVERINE #21 DARK MATTER #2 (OF 4) DEADPOOL #50 DEATHSTROKE #6 DEMON KNIGHTS #6 DICKS COLOR ED #1 DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS #15 ELRIC THE BALANCE LOST #8 FERALS #2 FRANKENSTEIN AGENT OF SHADE #6 GARTH ENNIS NINJETTES #1 GREEN LANTERN #6 GRIFTER #6 GRIMM FAIRY TALES #67 HAUNT #21 HUNTRESS #5 (OF 6) INCREDIBLE HULK #5 JOURNEY INTO MYSTERY #634 KEVIN KELLER #1 KEVIN SMITH BIONIC MAN #6 KIRBY GENESIS SILVER STAR #3 LADY DEATH (ONGOING) #14 LAST OF THE GREATS #5 LEGION LOST #6 LOBSTER JOHNSON THE BURNING HAND #2 (OF 5) MEGA MAN #10 MEMORIAL #3 (OF 6) MISTER TERRIFIC #6 MURKY WORLD ONE SHOT NEW MUTANTS #37 XREGB NEXT MEN AFTERMATH #40 NORTHANGER ABBEY #4 (OF 5) NORTHLANDERS #48 PC CAST HOUSE OF NIGHT #4 (OF 5) PENGUIN PAIN AND PREJUDICE #5 (OF 5) POWERS #8 PUNISHERMAX #22 RED SONJA #63 RESURRECTION MAN #6 RICHIE RICH VALENTINES SPECIAL 2012 ONE SHOT SCARLET SPIDER #2 SECRET AVENGERS #22 SEVERED #7 (OF 7) SPAWN #216 SPONGEBOB COMICS #7 STAR WARS AGENT O/T EMPIRE IRON ECLIPSE #3 (OF 5) STAR WARS CRIMSON EMPIRE III EMPIRE LOST #4 (OF 6) STAR WARS KNIGHTS OF THE OLD REPUBLIC WAR #2 (OF 5) SUICIDE SQUAD #6 SUPER HEROES #23 SUPERBOY #6 THE STRAIN #3 (OF 12) THIEF OF THIEVES #1 UNCANNY X-FORCE #21 XREGG UNWRITTEN #34 VENOM #13.1 WAR GODDESS #5 WARLORD OF MARS #15 WOLVERINE AND X-MEN #5 XREGG WOLVERINE AND X-MEN ALPHA AND OMEGA #2 (OF 5) X-MEN #24 XREGB

Books / Mags / Stuff AVENGERS ORIGIN TP BATMAN TIME AND THE BATMAN TP DOTTER OF HER FATHERS EYES HC ENDERS SHADOW ULTIMATE COLLECTION TP FAMOUS MONSTERS OF FILMLAND #260 DRACULA CVR FANTASTIC FOUR SEASON ONE PREM HC HACK SLASH TP VOL 10 DEAD CELEBRITIES ILLUSTRATION MAGAZINE #36 IZOMBIE TP VOL 03 SIX FEET UNDER AND RISING JUDGE DREDD MEGAZINE #319 KEVIN KELLER HC VOL 01 KING CONAN THE SCARLET CITADEL TP LIFE & DEATH OF FRITZ THE CAT HC LONE RANGER ZORRO TP VOL 01 DEATH OF ZORRO METAL GEAR SOLID OMNIBUS TP (O/A) NEW AVENGERS BY BRIAN MICHAEL BENDIS TP VOL 02 SHOWCASE PRESENTS GHOSTS TP VOL 01 STRANGE CASE OF MR HYDE TP SUPERMAN THE BLACK RING TP VOL 01 TORPEDO HC VOL 04 YOUNG ROMANCE BEST SIMON & KIRBY COMICS HC

What looks good to YOU?

-B

"Do They Come In KID'S Sizes?" Comics! Sometimes I Get A Bit Grumpy.

Whoops. Lost my momentum there. Trying to get it back by looking at some comics and then blurting thoughts out in the form of words. Disaster? I have a recipe for that! Here's the ingredients:

BATMAN: THE BRAVE AND THE BOLD #15 By Stewart McKenney/Dan Davis(a), Sholly Fisch(w), Guy Major(c) and Dezi Sienty(l) (DC Comics, $2.99) "No Exit" If he is to survive an unending series of death traps of unknown origin The Caped Crusader is going to need a miracle! Luckily he brought one along...MISTER MIRACLE!

""No...spears!" HAHAHAHAHAHA. Damn, even Kids think that joke is shit. Judgemental buggers."

This is a comic for Kids, is that alright? Is it alright if Kids have comics too? Because I know comics aren't for kids anymore. I know that the works of such mature intellects as Mark Millar, Brian Bendis and Geoff Johns have lifted the fights'n'tights funnybook up beyond the meagre intellects of children into a new and special place where they are exactly like comics for Kids but not as good; which in a very real sense is just like growing up. Everything's the same as when you were a Kid it's just a bit more shit. Comics for Kids, okay? Is that alright? Because if it isn't then there's no place for a PG version of CUBE starring Batman and Mister Miracle in which Batman solves the confounding conundrum bedevilling our two plucky chums by noticing that he doesn't need a shave and if that's true then I guess there's no place for the following exchange:

DOCTOR BEDLAM: However your MEAGER INTELLECT is no match for the brilliance of DOCTOR BEDLAM.

BATMAN: Really? How about my FIST?

There's always a place for that. Even though they do not use the correct English spelling of "meagre" and plump for the Colonial mutation. Yes, even though Mister Miracle looks creepy without a nose this is still VERY GOOD!

SCALPED #55 By R.M. Guera(a), Jason Aaron(w), Giulia Brusco(c) and Sal Cipriano(l) (Vertigo/DC Comics, $2.99) "Knuckle-Up" Conclusion

"Fact: I, John, actually have a thing about traumatic eye wounds. In that I fear them not that I get off on them. I know this is The Internet but be nice, now."

Now that's a fight scene! So that's GOOD!

PUNISHERMAX #21 By Steve Dillon(a), Jason Aaron(w), Matt Hollingsworth(c) and VC’s Cory Petit(l)(Marvel Comics, $3.99) "Homeless" Conclusion Frank and The Kingpin finally collide in a femur shattering confrontation from which only one will walk away! Actually they both walk away but The Kingpin has a hammer stuck in his head and scratches at the glass door of his apartment like a wet brained stray cat before Frank brings him down and then Frank falls over and so I guess it's really a femur shattering confrontation from which both walk away - but only for a bit!

"The White Male Heterosexual's Worst Nightmare"

Frank Castle is homeless. And he stands there singing for money. La da dee la dee da. Ladies and gentlemen, Ms. Crystal Waters! Terrible song that but, hey, I was watching THE HURT LOCKER the other night because I like to watch films everyone has already watched and moved on from. It's important to be timely, to be relevant, I feel. It was okay, really quite a decent film until the end when they did the thing with the guy at home. I didn't really like that bit because as is usual with cool hard asses we were invited to feel sorry for him because being such a hard ass he could find no pleasure in the real treasures of life such as cleaning out the guttering and shopping for cereal (don't load the dice too much, eh, Mark Boal) and yet we were also invited to admire him as the romantic lone wolf; true to himself and his manly nature. There are a lot of these films and they seem to fulfil the same function as Chick Flicks. They kind of undermine the gender stereotype while at the same time finding shelter within it. I call the male variation Dick Flicks. PUNISHERMAX is a Dick Flick. Y'know, that weirdly pathetic male wish fulfillment where you can be free at last to be a manly man but it has come at such a cost that you get to be both pitied and feared. Like a baby the size of a tower block crying for Mama to change its nappy. You'd be scared if that turned up outside your window but you'd feel a bit sorry for it as well. Unless you were a manly man in which case you would shoot it in its big fleshy demanding face and turn away before we saw your single, solitary tear.

Someone has to say it, Frank. You are a weak man, Frank. It isn't a sign of strength to run away from responsibility, Frank. You are a weak man, Frank Castle, to rather have your family die than pick up those toys one more time, rather than sit through The Only Way is Essex one more time, rather than have to sit through those shitty Star Wars films one more time...actually, Frank, I'm starting to see your point.I am a man after all and as a man I found PUNISHERMAX was GOOD! After all, I cannot tell a lie, like most men I like a good Dick Flick.

DEMON KNIGHTS #5 By Diogenes Neves/Oclair Albert(a), Paul Cornell(w), Marcelo Maiolo(c) and Jared K. Fletcher(l) (DC Comics, $2.99) "The Traitor"

"Meet The Twin Fists of Tolerance!"

The best thing about this comic, because it's important to be positive about comics or so people keep bleating, is the character of Jabr. Now it seems to me that this guy is rational, educated, level-headed, tasty in a fight and quite possibly not of European extraction. He's all those things and yet not boring, he is fact the best character in this except for "Sir" Justin because us Brits love a bit of crossdressing fun. Deny it to your Mother, pal, don't waste your breath denying it to me. Astonishingly The Internet has not lost its collective mind over Jabr and it's this magical fact, this clear indication that we have at last, as a species, grown enough to, finally, recognise the transitory nature of our fragile lives and put aside our differences to become, in effect, tolerant and wise and thus strong enough to forge the collective future all our predecessors suffered and died to accomplish. Or maybe nobody is reading this as it is, after all, just OKAY!

ALL-STAR WESTERN #4,#5 By Moritat, Phil Winslade(a), Justin Gray, Jimmy Palmiotti(w)Gabriel Bautista, Dominic Regan(c) and Rob Leigh(l) (DC Comics, $2.99) Jonah Hex in "Gotham Underground" and The Barbary Ghost in, er, "The Barbary Ghost" In the caverns beneath Gotham Jonah Hex finds not only a fine example of the unfettered free market in action but also ancient evil. And some bats. Because it is Gotham. Also in this issue: The Barbary Ghost makes a spooky debut!

It was kind of okay having Arkham around for a bit but now his role seems to have quickly devolved into basically telling us when Jonah Hex is being an asshole and getting himself in a pickle Jonah has to help him out of. This erodes a large portion of the appeal of Jonah for me. I like not knowing if he is actually going to help whoever's in trouble or if he's going to just be an ornery asshole. Obviously he has to save Arkham all the time or the Asylum will never be built and Batman's continuity will be all wronged-up. Oh noes! And also I like to decide myself when Jonah has been an asshole. On occasion it has taken me several pages to realise just how big an asshole Jonah has been on that occasion several pages previous to the point at which said realisation alights upon my mind. I like that. So, yeah, shut yer fancy yapper, Arkham! And let's get out of Gotham and light out for the territories; it's too constrictive, Jonah works best out in The Big Country where he can tread in big shit in all manner of unlikely ways. I like the colours by Bautista they are kind of organic but inorganic at the same time, like laser-pastels or something. Yes, people my age still think putting "laser" in front of something suggests The Future. Aren't old people just the cutest!

Oh, the backup is The Barbary Ghost; a new creation by Gray, Palmiotti and Winslade. While Winslade's brittle lines manfully attempt to ground the story in a specific milieu at once both evocative and atmospheric this is somewhat undermined by the fact that The Barbary Ghost's knockers are kind of flopping about a lot. Now I'm no Henry History but I would have thought that a Chinese lady in the 1870's would have been personally inclined, in large part due to the mores and customs of both the particular point in history she occupied and the heritage of her own people's customs and traditions, to keep her tits shut in a bit more. Or maybe I missed the class where we were taught about The Great 1870's Chinese Tunic Button Shortage. I could have; I was a bit of a git as a kid.

Still, credit given for an original character. After all in 2012 DC's big old money fountain will be WATCHMEN: HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER. No doubt JMS is going to improve the original by, apparently, so he says,  explaining about how Jon was obsessed with time yet he still went into that time-locked room! I don't know. I guess I missed the bits in WATCHMEN where Jon was continually asking people what time it was and craning his neck to look at clocks and banging his girlfriend from behind so he could put his hand on the base of her neck in such a way that it seemed erotically stimulating due to its sensual forcefulness but at the same time afforded him an uninterrupted view of his watch. Or maybe his Dad was a watchmaker and he thus believed in Design but he was changed into a God by a complete ACCIDENT! and that was a metaphor or an analogy or even the whole meshuggener point already or, Christ, who gives a shit. Yes, okay, it was strange. Really strange. I need it explaining in a book illustrated by a cheesecake maker. I'm glad it isn't someone muttonheadly literal who's got this gig, rather someone as dependable and imaginative as JMS who is going to bless us with a mini-series in which, let's face it, quite probably Dr Manhattan reaches back trough time to give events a nudge so that he effectively creates himself! SPOILER! Christ. Mind you I know it has always troubled me, raised a question in my mind, why Rorschach wears a woman's gusset on his face. Hopefully Brian Azzarrello will be setting my mind to rest on that score. Hurm.  In 2013: CAMELOT 3010!

Do you see what I did there? I did an impression of The Internet and played right into DC's hands and I missed the point. The point about WATCHMEN: BEFORE THEY WERE FAMOUS not being a nice thing is that endorsing this is endorsing DC's treatment of Alan Moore. DC own WATCHMEN so they can do what they want with WATCHMEN and what they want to do with WATCHMEN is make money because they are a business. I can understand that, I see that, thanks. DC do not own Alan Moore and they have treated him, and continue to treat him, in a shabby fashion unbecoming of adults. That's the issue here. If they can do that to Alan Moore and it is all right because we get our nice new comics then it is all right for them to continue treating creators in such a fashion. It isn't all right. It will never be all right. That's the point here, for me, not whether the books will be any good, or any of that other diversionary horse shit. Nut up or shut up, DC. Nut up or shut up.

ALL-STAR WESTERN was GOOD! if you can remember that far back.

AMERICAN VAMPIRE #23 By Rafael Albuquerque(a), Scott Snyder(w), Dave McCaig(c) and Jared K. Fletcher(l) (Vertigo/DC Comics,$2.99) "Death Race" Part Two of Four I haven't actually read this one. I don't know if you noticed that bit up there, the boring bit, yeah? The "Part Two of Four" bit? I wouldn't have; I'd have skipped it and looked at the scan (which isn't there because I haven't read it, see) and then read the text I judged most likely to contain a cock joke or insult a noted comic creator. So I can fully understand if you missed the whole "Part Two of Four" bit. I didn't though and since I have yet to receive "Part One of Four" I am unable to read this comic. I don't mention that for any other reason than the fact that Mr. Jeff Lester and Mr. Graeme McMillan were talking about how weird their comics reading patterns can be (I mean I've got this comic bought and paid for but I'm not going to read it? Saywhanow?!) And I just wanted to mention that I share their sickness; I sup from the same trough of pain as they. Also, just thinking about them both brings me physical pleasure. Hurm.NuuuuhHHHH.

Sorry about this one, folks, hopefully it'll be better next week. Have a good weekend with COMICS!

January 2012: Tucker Had To File These At Some Point

What follows is the first in what will become a series of 12 posts, capturing the official Savage Critics rating for all of the comics that I read but couldn't find the time (or space) to write about in a more "professional" capacity. [Note: this post includes comics read in 2011 as well as stuff from January, so you can expect some cursory bits here. Also: I missed you guys. I miss your face, your moist carcass, your buttermilk porpoise, your tender kiss and your sloppy tongues. Joe McCulloch is going to make a great father to what I've got growing inside me right now, and I hear great things are brewing in the Loins of Khosla. This is dedicated to Brian Hibbs, who is a great man, but would be even greater if he threw away all the sandals I feel sure he must own.]

Herbie #1 Ogden Whitney A+ Comics, 1990

This was the first in a short lived series of reprints of the old Herbie comics, most of which are known due to their inclusion in Dan Nadel's Art Out of Time as well as being referred to by Alan Moore as his favorite super-hero comic. It's about a fat kid who solves problems and sometimes wears a costume while doing so. Most of its appeal escaped me, but I greatly enjoyed Herbie's parents, who seem to find him almost as obnoxious as I eventually did. OKAY!

What Makes A Man Dress Up Like A Bat?? Miscelleanous Philly Comix Jam, 2009

A short comics anthology of Batman parodies on newsprint. The strongest entries are the ones that go weird, like one where Batman's biggest emergency is helping liven up a shitty lawn party, but those are few and far between. The majority are just low-rent imitations of Mad magazine, and for whatever reason, many of those are just really obvious gay jokes. EH! (I really think that if you're going to do a superheroes-are-gay-haw-haw comic, it should go all the way--either full on hardcore sex, like that comic Dirk Deppey linked to once where Optimus Prime forced himself upon Megatron (don't look it up, seriously) or full on tortured romance, like that scene in the Ethan Hawke Great Expectations where he's yelling at what he thinks is Gwyneth Paltrow.)

Kramers Ergot 3 Miscelleanous Avodah, 2003

Fun stuff here. Soto, Nilsen and Harkham (especially Harkham) are the big stand outs of the volume, although there's a couple of much longer pieces that probably had some measure of appeal at the time. On the negative side, it proves a pet theory true: most cute indie comics are meaningless exercises best reserved for the portfolios of people trying to get work storyboarding children's cartoons. If it isn't being done for small children, what's the point of these kinds of comics? They're never interesting to anyone, they're so basic in construction that "good drawing" is essentially shorthand for "easy drawing", and it doesn't take but a few years for the creators to invariably fuck off back to whatever their other interests are. Still VERY GOOD! overall.

Garden Yuichi Yokoyama Picturebox, 2011

This is the only one of Yokoyama's books that features characters that should get beaten to death, but considering how quickly he seems to be working these days, he'll probably add to that eventually. Mostly, this book is just not as good as Travel in every way that it can be ranked, even down to the way it's printed. It's a testament to how interesting this guy is that "nowhere near as good as something else" still translates to VERY GOOD! on the Savage Critics scale.

Omelett Menu Reprodukt, 2000

This is one of the most depressing comics about motherhood you're ever going to read. The number of abortions would quadruple overnight if it were more easily available. Makes me wish there was a rating higher than EXCELLENT!

Cabbie Marti Fantagraphics, 2011

The page in here where the cabbie brings his father's sewage covered remains home and puts them in what's left of the coffin and then puts the coffin on top of his mother's recently deceased body tells you everything you need to know. Unless you're a Prince Valiant dude, this is the best reprint of the year. Impregnable would be the best word, EXCELLENT! will have to do.

Judge Dredd Tour of Duty: Mega-City Justice John Wagner, Colin Macneil, Carlos Ezquerra, John Higgins, other british people 2000AD, 2011

A lot of this feels retready--there's a bad Judge who does bad things and makes bad calls, and PJ Maybe is around--but it's Judge Dredd, and there's something kind of gross about the idea of Judge Dredd being a thing that should be constantly reworked and innovated. Look at the way they ruined MILF porn, you know? Don't do that to Dredd. GOOD!

Darkie's Mob The Secret War of Joe Darkie John Wagner, Mike Western Titan, 2011

If you've always wanted to read Bad Company but would rather exchange the alien world setting for the hardcore no-apology racism of 1942-era Burma, then get yourself a copy of Darkie's Mob. Like all the other Titan reprints of British war comics, it's good looking, bound well, and hates you more than anything else you've ever let into your home. Bonus points for the introduction by Garth Ennis, because it's the best thing he's written since Valley Forge, Valley Forge. GOOD!

I Will Bite You and Other Stories Joseph Lambert Secret Acres, 2011

These comics are all pretty great, even though sometimes it feels like Lambert is more invested in fucking with the panel borders and general comic-y shit than he is in doing anything on the story front. At the same time, he's way more interesting than most of the people who do that sort of experimenting, and his usage of color in the cave people story in the back is fascinating. GOOD!

Real Deal #1 By the Real Deal guys, ask Seneca or Marra to explain 'em Real Deal 1989

The main problem with Real Deal is that there aren't enough sexy drawings in it. These kinds of comics--gutter violence, crazy logic rough trade comics--always work best when they have drawings of women with large breasts in them. That's just a fact of life, and if you don't like that, that's totally fine: but honestly, you weren't going to like the part in Real Deal where a prostitute gets her head smashed into the sidewalk with a garbage can either. OKAY!

Punisher War Journal #28 Mike Baron, Tex, Greg Wright Marvel, 1991

A done in one story about Frank Castle checking in on an old flame, who is now dating your standard rich fuck-up. This rich fuck-up is in the meatpacking business, and there's some leftover "let's give a shit" from the 80's about meat-eating, but mostly it's just an opportunity for Frank to kill people in a processing facility, with Texas Chainsaw type implements. Also, the rich guy is a crackhead. Great Michael Golden cover. VERY GOOD!

Cable #1 Fabian Nicieza, Art Thibert, Marie Javins Marvel, 1993

A confusing comic about Cable. There's a shiny print effect on the cover, but it only applies to the future-style bandolier that Cable is wearing. So many 90's super-hero comics have covers that look like the company went straight to print with what they were finding in high school kid's sketchbooks. "I see you like tracing Jim Lee comics, kid. Well, it's time to become a star!" AWFUL!

Grit Bath #1-3 Renee French Fantagraphics, 1993-4

These are the best comics I read in 2011, and I know that to be true, because I fucking read these comics over and over and over again. I read them like they were going to bring Patrice O'Neal back to life. There's a letter in the second issue where Jim Woodring says that the comic scared him, and I can see why. Grit Bath #2 makes Pim & Francie look like an issue of the Tiny Titans. Renee French makes everybody else look like a weak piece of shit. EXCELLENT!

Acme Novelty #5 Chris Ware Fantagraphics, 1995

This has my favorite part of Jimmy Corrigan in it, the part where he smashes his glass into his father's face and says "I brought you a basket of fruit" right before slicing his dad's back wide open. People who prefer graphic novel collections of comics like this don't seem to understand how super-fucking awesome it would have been to have read that sequence in this fashion. It's two pages from the end of the comic. That's so much better than it happening on some random page in the middle of some 400 page thing you're plowing through on the fucking couch while some garbage wallpaper music plays in the background. I feel weaker as a man when I have to bookmark a comic book, and I should. EXCELLENT!

Jimbo #1 Gary Panter Zongo, 1995

This is probably the most read Jimbo comic, I bet. How many of these did Groening print? The nicest thing about those Slings and Arrows guys is the way they just jump right at the meat of the response. Regarding this, their reviewer says "it's almost impossible to explain the quality of his work if you don't see it immediately." Like one of those posters at the mall, I guess. Garloo makes me completely out of proportion angry, it's really unfair. VERY GOOD!

Space Adventures Presents UFO #60 Jim Aparo, Denny O'Neil, Anonymous Charlton, 1967

An early Aparo comic done under a nom de plume. It doesn't look like him yet, although the classic Aparo face does look buried underneath some of the faces on display. For the brevity of the comic, the story is relatively extensive--the first part is ground level espionage shit that gives way to post orbit combat--but it's weirdly cheap, as if the artists (Aparo wasn't alone on the book) didn't have the money to draw cool space shit. I know that doesn't make sense. EH!

Batman #221 Frank Robbins, Irv Novick, Dick Giordano DC, 1970

From that great period where Bruce Wayne wore yellow ties and a gigantic hair helmet, this has to be the only Batman comic where the Tales From The Crypt denouement is the bad guy dying in a pit at the choppers of his own bloodthirsty lamb. Batman doesn't give a fuck, because the guy is a Nazi-loving German. The next story is about some firemen, Vietnam, and a fire-starting idol from Vietnam. It seems to be missing a plot, because the comic ends on the page where the setup finishes. It's actually a pretty funny story if you read it as a fireman comic where a crazy person in a Batman outfit jumps through the window and attacks a tiny statue while the firemen are trying to get their job done. Pretty much EH!

Time Twisters #5, 12, 13 Various Quality, Unknown

2000AD shorts, horrible reprint quality. Tge Peter Milligan stuff is alright. There's one story by "K. Gosnell" about a soul collecting devil who forces dead men down to Airbase Hell, and the last page of that comic should have been the first page of a much longer one. Four page comics have to be tough though. These reprints are cherry picked from all over the place, and there's still times when you see the construction seams. Comics wise they probably deserve better, but the reproduction value alone makes for an AWFUL read.

The Shadow #1-7 Denny O'Neil, Mike Kaluta, Berni Wrightson, Len Wein, Frank Robbins DC, 1974

Super good comics. Even when it's just Kaluta that keeps you moving forward--which is about half the time, although O'Neil does knock a few plotlines out of the park--these are really satisfying single issue comics, and the art is just fucking astounding to look at. The Shadow really is a great character--so creepy, an extremely weird holdover that's still just pulpy enough to make super-hero comics seem too weak to contain him--and yet there's something kind of wonderful about the little material we have to judge him by. Gorgeous. VERY GOOD!

Unknown Soldier #219 Frank Miller, Bob Haney, Dick Ayers, Romeo Tanghal, Elliot Maggin DC, 1978

The end of the Bob Haney story is classic Haney weirdness, with three panels of people laughing at the German High Command's attempt to paint a loss as a victory and the last panel being concentration camp inmates laughing while a Nazi guard holds a tommy gun on them while bullwhipping them with the other. It's completely fucking insane. The Frank Miller part is him and another guy drawing a Maggin five pager about an Achaean battle. The comic is pretty terrible. Except for the cover, which is slap-your-mother amazing. Joe Kubert in blue: that really doesn't happen enough. Miller stuff: AWFUL. Haney stuff: GOOD!

Weird War Tales #64 Frank Miller, others DC, 1978

Had to figure out where this was, it wasn't very memorable. The Miller story (again, he's not alone) is so much the sort of thing you'd find in an EC Comic that I'd be surprised to find out it was all original. Again, a great Kubert cover on an EH! comic.

Judge Anderson The PSI Files Volume 1 Grant, Wagner, Ewins, Kitson, Simpson, Ezquerra, others Rebellion, 2009

Heavily front loaded, with almost everything after the half-way mark almost unendurably bad. There's a story in here where Anderson shots a kid she's come to save point blank (she has no choice), and it's surprising how satisfying that little twist on the old song turns out to be. That story and a few others, as well as some pretty great art push this one into the OKAY! category.

Cable #96 Robert Weinberg, Michael Ryan Marvel, 2001

Recommended by David Wolkin, who is something of a connoisseur of weird Cable comics. This is probably going to be the high water mark all stand in fear of, as it features Cable agreeing to an arm wrestling match with an immortal caveman who lived through the pre-Ice Age alien invasion, Biblical times, and now runs a bar? It's also from that time period where Richard Starkings was able to convince everybody on the planet that Comicraft lettering was the best thing since smoking cocaine. EH!

Psycho Comics #1 Daniel Clowes, Rick Altergott, Pete Friedrich, Joe Kerswild Look Mom, 1981

Malicious, weird, amatuerish horror stuff from a surprising cast of creators. None of this is that remarkable, but I'd still call it OKAY!

Tarzan #74 People, for sure Dell, 1955

One of Gary Panter's favorite comics, according to one of those websites that ask about that sort of thing. It's really fucking funny, both because it means to be and because it's a weird old Tarzan comic. There's a back story called "Brothers of the Spear" which seems kind of forward thinking for a 50's comic. VERY GOOD!

Heavy Metal Presents Moebius Moebius, Fellini Heavy Metal, 1981

One of the easiest Moebius collections to find, definitely the cheapest. To some people, this is probably the equivalent of It Takes A Nation of Millions or Giant Steps in terms of just being a thing you own until you die, because it does everything the way everything is supposed to be done. EXCELLENT.

The Phantom Stranger #1 Mignola, Kupperberg, Russell DC, 1987

If I had time to scan in some panels--and I promise to make time for that the next time I do one of these--this would be one of those comics where I just throw my hands up and start ripping the whole thing like we're on Scans Daily in 06. Everything in this comic looks fucking great, from the trash in an alley to the look in Jimmy Olsen's eyes. It's impossible to read, but man: it's a beauty to drink. VERY GOOD!

Wrath of the Spectre #1-4 Aparo, Fleisher DC 1988 (reprinting old material)

I read this a while back, after Darwyn Cooke told me it was his favorite super-hero comic. I don't know if he was being serious, but I'll be goddamned if it hasn't become one of mine. Everything in here--from the unbelievable violence to the brilliant pisstake humiliation the Clark Kent stand-in goes through--is note perfect. EXCELLENT. If you don't get why guys like me live and die by the mere mention of Jim Aparo's name, buy these four comics (they're easily available) and you'll see why.

Wolverine Cable: Guts and Glory Casey, Platt Marvel, 1999

I was hoping this would have the same dumpster badass quality of Hearts of Darkness (which still has the best Ghost Rider plot of all time) but it's just a by-the-numbers adventure that feels like Casey was trying to plagiarize a Garth Ennis story from memory, on a dare. Stephen Platt seems like one of those artists who never met a super-hero story they couldn't take way too fucking seriously. The whole thing is AWFUL.

Shaolin Cowboy #3, 7 Darrow Burlyman

I could look at these all day, I can't read them for more than a page at a time. EXCELLENT and AWFUL, all in one.

Wolverine Revolver #1 Gischler, Pastoras Marvel, 2009

I actually had post-it notes stuck in this issue, I so wanted to write a long essay on it, the sort of thing that would shake the comics world to its core and cry out for More Das Pastoras Wolverine comics, and now I'm not even sure I could tell you why that is. I think I read this comic every day for a straight month, and I think I could do that again and not feel like the time was wasted. Jog likes it too? I don't know what to tell you here. I love this fucking thing. EXCELLENT!

Acme Novelty Library #8 Ware Fantagraphics 1996-7

Lovely comic, purchased cover price at a store in the South and given to me as a gift. This is a tougher chapter than the one mentioned above--Jimmy loses his tooth, there's an accident, lots of nature drawings. The stand-out sequences are all about color--the red double pager, the shades of blue when the cane is waved, the blue/red boxes that yell LATER and THEN...it's EXCELLENT, we got a few of those in a row.

The Body of Work Huizenga, 2011

The Fielder stuff and more, hand colored cover--ah, Kevin Huizenga deserves more than the short shrift he's going to get here. Smart, smart stuff. At some point, I'm going to only read Huizenga/Ware/Otomo/Kirby an entire year. I won't come out of that year any smarter, but I'll bet I'll be so happy that my buttons will burst. Body of Work: you're EXCELLENT.

Danger Country #1-2 Levon Jihanian, 2001

Sort of like Dungeon Quest or Mourning Star, but stiffer and with a set of bad guys so intense they're almost out-of-place. It's always sort of a rough start for me with these things, but I'm pretty convinced that's all me: I just can't tell if I'm supposed to take the gigantic cat-man Conan character seriously, you know? It's say this is GOOD, I'm definitely curious to see where it goes.

Peter Parker The Spectacular Spider-Man #28 Frank Miller, Bill Mantlo Marvel, 1978

One of those super-hero comics where the layouts probably looked way more interesting than the finished drawings. There's a panel in here where Spider-Man blows some shit up in a squatting position--or something, I can't really comprehend the writing--and it's hard not to stare at it over and over again. GOOD, sure.

Judge Dredd: The Restricted Files #2 Various Rebellion, 2010

A torturous collection of some of the worst Dredd stories I've ever read, with the only bright spots being random bits of lunacy, like an airbrushed story about a rat who wears his dead rat father's top hat (it's an old Mean Machine story, don't worry about it). It's AWFUL stuff, although the Wolk doesn't share that opinion.

Comix Experience ONOMATOPOEIA #193

Let's try this new experiment:  for a week (until 2/7/12) you can get a (COLOR!) PDF of CEO #193 (April 2012 Shipping books) written by Graeme McMillan by clicking here. You can also get the companion order form right here.Let me know if that works for you, and if you like it enough for me to bother creating and linking to it each month?

-B

Wait, What? Ep. 73: Thicker Than Forget

We didn't even come close.

Don't get me wrong--we certainly tried.  But give Graeme and I more than four dozen questions with an amorphous time deadline and you're not going to get the bulk of those questions answered even with us putting in two and a half hours to get it done.  [Though we do so at the expense of Haruki Murakami's 1Q84: if you are currently reading that book, please skip over the 20-25 minute section of the podcast to avoid some ship-sinking spoilers.  (Sorry again, Luke.)]

So consider this Part 1 of our answers to your questions, with Part 2 to come next week.  If we go to Part 3, I give you permission to begin hunting us as the most dangerous game.  (Although, really we're a far cry from that: I'd say I'm about on par with hunting sloths or maybe opposums, and Graeme might be at the level of a squirrel, though the squirrel might be rabid, maybe.)

The Ancient Prophecies foretold this episode would be found in the land of iTunes. But lo, also shall ye find it here:

Wait, What? Ep. 73: Thicker Than Forget

As always, we thank you for listening, and for your questions, and for your patience.  We hope you enjoy!

Arriving 2/1/2012

First shipping week of February (already?!?!)  --  Not a ton of books shipping (only a two-page packing list this week), but the ones that are look pretty dang decent to me! ACTION COMICS #6 ALPHA GIRL #1 AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #679 ANIMAL MAN #6 AVENGERS ACADEMY #25 AVENGERS X-SANCTION #3 (OF 4) BATWING #6 BETRAYAL O/T PLANET O/T APES #4 (OF 4) BOYS #63 DAMAGED #5 (OF 6) DARK HORSE PRESENTS #8 DEFENDERS #3 DETECTIVE COMICS #6 DOCTOR WHO ONGOING VOL 2 #14 ETERNAL DESCENT VOL 2 #3 (OF 6) FATALE #2 FEAR ITSELF FEARLESS #8 (OF 12) FUTURAMA COMICS #59 GREEN ARROW #6 HAWK AND DOVE #6 HELLRAISER #10 HULK #48 ICE AGE ICED IN ONE SHOT INFESTATION 2 TRANSFORMERS #1 (OF 2) INVINCIBLE #88 IRREDEEMABLE #34 IZOMBIE #22 JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL #6 KIRBY GENESIS CAPTAIN VICTORY #3 LOCKE & KEY CLOCKWORKS #4 (OF 6) MAGIC THE GATHERING #1 MEN OF WAR #6 OMAC #6 PUNISHER #8 RACHEL RISING #5 RED LANTERNS #6 REED GUNTHER #8 RICHIE RICH GEMS WINTER SPECIAL ONE SHOT ROBERT JORDAN WHEEL OF TIME EYE O/T WORLD #20 SAVAGE DRAGON #178 SCOOBY DOO WHERE ARE YOU #18 SERGIO ARAGONES FUNNIES #7 SIMPSONS ILLUSTRATED #1 SONIC THE HEDGEHOG #233 STAR WARS DAWN OF THE JEDI #0 STATIC SHOCK #6 STORMWATCH #6 STRANGE TALENT OF LUTHER STRODE #5 (OF 6) SUPERNATURAL #5 (OF 6) SWAMP THING #6 SWEET TOOTH #30 THE LONE RANGER #2 THOR DEVIANTS SAGA #4 (OF 5) TWELVE #9 (OF 12) (RES) UNCANNY X-FORCE #21 XREGG UNCANNY X-MEN #6 VALEN OUTCAST #3 MAIN CVRS VENOM #13 VILLAINS FOR HIRE #3 (OF 4) WARLORD OF MARS ANNUAL #1 WARRIORS OF MARS #1 WINTER SOLDIER #1 WORLD OF ARCHIE DOUBLE DIGEST #14 X-CLUB #3 (OF 5) X-FACTOR #231 XREGG

Books / Mags / Stuff ACTION MYSTERY THRILLS COVERS SC AMERICAN VAMPIRE HC VOL 03 ASSASSINS CREED THE FALL TP AVENGERS ASSEMBLE TP VOL 02 BATMAN GATES OF GOTHAM TP COMPLETE ANNOTATED OZ SQUAD TP ESSENTIAL FANTASTIC FOUR TP VOL 06 NEW ED FRACTURED FABLES TP GARTH ENNIS JENNIFER BLOOD TP VOL 01 HEAVY METAL MARCH 2012 JOHN CARTER A PRINCESS OF MARS GN TP JOHN ROMITA AMAZING SPIDER-MAN ARTIST ED HC MADMAN 20TH ANNIVERSARY MONSTER HC PREVIEWS #281 FEBRUARY 2012 RAT CATCHER TP WARLORD OF MARS FALL OF BARSOOM TP VOL 01 XOMBI TP

What looks good to YOU?

-B

Cranky! Hibbs mutters about 1/25

Cranky Cranky Cranky! JUSTICE LEAGUE #5: Well, at least it finally came out.

Like I had said, I was liking each issue a little bit more than the one before, but that ground to a stop on this issue. Screeeeeeeech!

Part of it is surely the dumb presentation of Darkseid.  To me, at least, Darkseid is a master planner, a manipulator, and while, yes, he CAN surely kick your ass, why would he bother sullying himself on a "gnat" like you?

This one, though... hrf, he has one whole line (his name), and he's just smashing things up otherwise. Where's the depth? Where's the grandeur of Kirby's Fourth World?

Why the hell do his Omega Beams not work?!?! They hit Superman and, like, not much happens? Huh?

Darkseid isn't Doomsday, and it's frustrating they're playing him that way, essentially turning one of the darkest villains in the DCU into an one-dimensional cardboard cutout.

I also can't for the life of me figure out why Cyborg is on this team, at all. Hell, or even what Aquaman and Wonder Woman were doing for most of the issue?

There were things I DID like: I don't know that it makes any sense whatsoever, but I really liked this Batman dropping his defenses (and mask) like that to GL; and I liked the "We got this!" "You call that a battle-cry?" thing... but those are beats, not cohesive elements of the story, and none of it elevates over an "EH".

SECRET AVENGERS #21.1: Actually, what I mostly really want to talk about is how the hell much I hate that new Hawkeye uniform -- I mean, I get how they want to appeal to people who see the Avengers movie, or whatever, and this is pretty much the costume there, but, damn it, that's not Hawkeye's costume, and that's not even a "costume" per se anyway. The only bit you couldn't buy in a store is those funky shades, and it really doesn't make Clint look like a Hero at all.

I don't know, gross.

The comic itself was, I thought, fairly bad -- yet another new made-up crime-driven nation (what's wrong with Madripor, then?), and it's got Captain America running around in a flag, lecturing Hawkeye on stealth. Yes, that's kind of a hot mess. Pretty AWFUL.

OK< all I have time for today -- what did YOU think?

-B

And We Love You, So Come On, Come On, Come On (Ask Us Questions, I Mean)

Dear Wait, What? listeners, The problem with real life is that, when a friend such as esteemed co-host and editor and all-round-Mr.-Good-Guy Jeff Lester asks you to put up a post on Savage Critics so that everyone can leave comments that are actually questions for you to answer on the next episode of your podcast, and when you say "Sure, I can do that!", several million other things will suddenly need to be done, and then it's the end of the next day and you still haven't posted said post and find yourself overwhelmed - overwhelmed, I say - by guilt.

Nevertheless: Jeff and I are going to be recording the next episode on Thursday, so you have until lunchtime Thursday (Pacific, for those who care about timezones) to leave questions for us to answer/ignore/try to answer and then get sidetracked and talk about something else instead/a mixture of any of the previous possibilities in the comments. Please be kind, and if you can't be kind, at least push the meanness in the direction of someone who deserves it, like Magneto or someone (Yeah, like anyone is buying that "reformed" schtick, Magneto...).

Love,

Graeme

P.S., If you came here looking for the latest podcast, scroll down.

Wait, What? Ep. 72.1: 'Cause of a List For Life...

Top Five Reasons to do a List Podcast

1. They're Fun
2. They're (Comparatively) Easy
3. The Third Item is Usually Not Great, But The Fourth is Great
4. It Helps Our Remedial Counting Skills

Five Things You'll Hear About on This Podcast (In No Particular Order)

1. Superman's Diary
2. Avengers: HR
3. A President Who Speaks Like Jack Kirby
4. The Still-New Theme Music
5. Flooding (At The Beginning and Only Very Briefly)

Five Ways You Can Hear This Podcast

1. On iTunes
2. Here on our RSS feed
3. At a Friend's House
4. In the Dreams of Stephen Williamson
5. Just Below:

Wait, What? Ep. 72: \'Cause of A List For Life...

A List of Concluding Elements

1. we hope you enjoy
2. thanks for listening!
3. We apologize for the headings making these lists look unattractive!

Arriving 1/25/2012

Happy Lunar New Year to you! Have some comics! 30 DAYS OF NIGHT ONGOING #4 ALL STAR WESTERN #5 ALPHA FLIGHT #8 AMERICAN VAMPIRE #23 ANGEL & FAITH #6 AQUAMAN #5 ARCHIE #629 (ARCHIE MEETS KISS PT 3 ) ARTIFACTS ORIGINS ONE SHOT ASTONISHING X-MEN #46 AVENGERS SOLO #4 (OF 5) B & V FRIENDS DOUBLE DIGEST #221 BART SIMPSON COMICS #67 BATMAN THE DARK KNIGHT #5 BETTIE PAGE IN DANGER #1 BLACKHAWKS #5 BPRD HELL ON EARTH RUSSIA #5 BULLETPROOF COFFIN DISINTERRED #1 (OF 6) CAPTAIN AMERICA AND BUCKY #626 CREEPY COMICS #7 DAKEN DARK WOLVERINE #20 DARK SHADOWS #3 DARKNESS #98 DC UNIVERSE ONLINE LEGENDS #22 DEADPOOL #49.1 ELEPHANTMEN #37 FANTASTIC FOUR #602 FF #14 FLASH #5 FURY OF FIRESTORM THE NUCLEAR MEN #5 GAME OF THRONES #5 GARTH ENNIS JENNIFER BLOOD #8 GFT ALICE IN WONDERLAND #1 GODZILLA KINGDOM OF MONSTERS #11 GREEN HORNET ANNUAL #2 GREEN LANTERN NEW GUARDIANS #5 I VAMPIRE #5 INCORRUPTIBLE #26 INFESTATION 2 #1 (OF 2) JUSTICE LEAGUE #5 JUSTICE LEAGUE DARK #5 KEY OF Z #4 (OF 4) KING CONAN PHOENIX ON THE SWORD #1 (OF 4) KIRBY GENESIS #5 KNIGHTS OF THE DINNER TABLE #182 KUNG FU PANDA #4 (OF 6) LAST PHANTOM #11 LEGION SECRET ORIGIN #4 (OF 6) MARKSMEN #5 (OF 6) MICE TEMPLAR VOL 3 #7 MIGHTY THOR #10 NANCY IN HELL ON EARTH #1 (OF 4) ROBOCOP ROAD TRIP #2 SAVAGE HAWKMAN #5 SECRET AVENGERS #21.1 SIXTH GUN #18 SPIDER-MAN #22 STRAWBERRY SHORTCAKE BERRY FUN #4 (OF 4) STUFF OF LEGEND JESTERS TALE #4 (OF 4) SUPERMAN #5 TAROT WITCH OF THE BLACK ROSE #72 TEEN TITANS #5 TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES ONGOING #6 THE IMMORTAL DEMON I/T BLOOD #2 TOO MUCH COFFEE MAN #2 FACSIMILE ED TRANSFORMERS ROBOTS IN DISGUISE ONGOING #1 ULTIMATE COMICS ULTIMATES #6 UNWRITTEN #33.5 USAGI YOJIMBO #143 VOODOO #5 WALKING DEAD #93 WITCHBLADE #152 X-MEN LEGACY #261

Books / Mags / Stuff ADD HC ASTONISHING SPIDER-MAN AND WOLVERINE TP AVATAR LAST AIRBENDER TP VOL 01 PROMISE PART 1 BATMAN BEYOND INDUSTRIAL REVOLUTION TP CAPTAIN AMERICA BY ED BRUBAKER PREM HC VOL 01 CATWOMAN TP VOL 01 CREEPY ARCHIVES HC VOL 12 DAREDEVIL BY BRUBAKER AND LARK ULT COLL TP BOOK 01 DAREDEVIL BY MARK WAID PREM HC VOL 01 FANTASTIC LIFE GN FF BY JONATHAN HICKMAN PREM HC VOL 02 HAWKMAN BY GEOFF JOHNS OMNIBUS HC VOL 01 JUDGE ANDERSON PSYCHIC CRIME FILES TP MANARA LIBRARY HC VOL 02 MMW UNCANNY X-MEN TP VOL 04 POLLY & PIRATES TP VOL 02 RED SKULL INCARNATE TP RESURRECTION MAN TP VOL 01 SAM & TWITCH COMPLETE COLLECTION HC VOL 02 SIZZLE #52 (A) SPONTANEOUS HC SWEET TOOTH TP VOL 04 ENDANGERED SPECIES WARREN ELLIS ATMOSPHERICS COLOR ED GN WOLVERINE WOLVERINE VS X-MEN TP X-MEN LEGACY AFTERMATH TP

What looks good to YOU?

-B