"If Only I Could Convince BEVERLY That He's As IMPORTANT As I Know He Is." COMICS FOLK! Sometimes It's 65 Pictures For 65 Years!

It's the 7th October 2015 and that means it's been 65 years of the chunky wee thermodynamic miracle Howard Victor Chaykin! Today is his day, so I'm going to shut my yapper and below the break you can feast your eyes on 65 images culled from The Chaykin Section in The Kane Garage Archives. Raise your root beers high and let's all drink to another 65 years of the amazing Mr. Chaykin!  photo HeaderB_zpswlcrwrik.jpg

THE SHADOW by Chaykin, Bruzenak & Wald

Anyway, this...

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  Happy Birthday, Mr. Chaykin and thanks for all the - COMICS!!!

Wait, What? Ep. 126: More of Everything

 photo null_zps6e332992.jpgBecause it is Kirby and because it is...my heart.

Okay, tech problems resolved! (You know, as long as you're talking about our recording problems, and not about how everyone has basically been hacked by the government without their consent for years...) So, behind the jump, show notes for our two-hour plus installment of the Show That Cannot Say Die (Without Skype Cutting Out On It)!

Oh, but before you do, make sure you check out posts by Hibbs and Smitty below -- today is our semi-annual Salute to Content!

Anyway, yeah, embarrassing though it is to admit, I think maybe both Graeme and I using Macs now may have exacerbated some of our recording problems with Skype?  Hopefully, that will no longer be an issue as we're trying a whole new workaround (Audio Hijack Pro of our Facetime calls, in case you're interested).  It's not quite perfect -- I've gotta learn how to adjust my microphone levels before we talk and I pray to God that doesn't mean going through Soundcloud because that shit baffles me -- but it's a start, I guess.

So: show notes!  They are short, in part because we were very focused in our chatty way this week and also because I kinda strained my back moving longboxes this weekend and so I'm loathe to spend too much time sitting in this damn uncomfortable desk chair of mine.

0:00-34:57:  Salutations: yup,  it's the dawning of a brand-new era for Wait, What? as we dump Skype and go with a different recording method.  (To be fair, Skype dumped us first.)  We try to be mercifully brief talking tech shit so we can get down to our first minefield of the podcast discussing (again!) the fourth season of Arrested Development.  Wildly over-caffeinated, Jeff wants to talk about critical reception and how a person's individual critical taste develops and (I guess when you get right down to it) how frustrating it is that all the smart sensible people disagree with him.  Graeme, for his part, is having--if not none, then certainly very little--of Jeff's points, for better and worse. 34:57-1:11:05: Finally! Graeme and Jeff talk about Al Ewing's The Fictional Man!  Unfortunately, it's been long enough for Graeme and Jeff (and Jeff is over-caffeinated) that the opening of our discussion should be listened to *for comedic purposes only*.  There's a tremendous amount of initial flailing about how to describe the book, especially when one of the contributors to the podcast has apparently had a stroke and cannot use his big boy words. 1:11:05-1:24:43:  Comics! We do in fact remember what they are.  Jeff read and enjoyed tremendously Faith Erin Hicks' The Adventures of Superhero Girl, and also dug In the Kitchen With Alain Passard by Christophe Blain.  Thanks to a Whatnaut sharing their digital codes for Daredevil #26 and Superior Spider-Man #10, I read those and boy oh boy were they good. 1:24:43-1:38:45:  By contrast, Graeme has read Age of Ultron #9.  If you listen to it, you can hear Jeff rubbing his hands with glee as Graeme shares his feelings about the book, and Graeme also read Avengers Arena #10, which provides a bit of comparison and contrast with the Catwoman/Justice League controversy.  "Bonus:" Jeff's not-very-good Hellblazer story pitch from around the time the Constantine movie came out. 1:38:45-1:39;21: Intermission! 1:39;21-1:43:53: We are back and, in relatively short order, we contemplate Paul Jenkins and his rather spectacular interview at Bleeding Cool  and, to a lesser extent, his open letter at Comic Book Resources. 1:43:53-2:07:01: Oh, but first before we do, here's the first installment of "Graeme Says It Because You Said It" [working title].  Then it's on to a consideration of what we're currently buying from DC, whether Jeff should once again take the crazy train to Boycottville, more from the Jenkins article, and what have you. 2:07:01-end: Graeme didn't much of a chance to talk about comics he's read this week, so Jeff twists his arm and tries to get some quick opinions from him about Green Lantern, Angel and Faith, and a re-run of Pete Tomasi's Batman and Robin. And then we end the podcast! Without it ending us first!

Chances are good the sucker will be up on iTunes by now, but even if so, you are welcome to get at it with the handy link provided below.  As always, we thank you for listening and we shall return next week with more...of everything.

Wait, What? Ep. 126: More of Everything

Wait, What? Ep. 101: Little Shavers

2001_kirbyKirby. Kubrick. 2001.

2001 for Episode 101?  I don't think it's deliberate, but knowing Mr. McMillan, I wouldn't entirely rule it out either.

After the jump:  Welcome to a new age of... Show notes!

0:00-1:51: Testing, testing! (Okay, I admit it: the new age of show notes is pretty much exactly like the old age of show notes.)
1:51-6:39:  Graeme (and his new friend, a mystical crow) share an observation about Brian Bendis and his interviews on Word Balloon, which leads to a bit of discussion about our sound problems for Ep. 100.  And if anyone wants to do up a splash page for "Even Troopers Have Their Limits!" as described herein, we would figure out some way to thank you for it (probably in twitter shout-outs and old review copies, and if you've listened to enough episodes, you know exactly how the labor for those rewards is being divided).
6:39-10:13: Are you experienced in the art of... K-Box?  Graeme and Jeff begin developing their next money-making scheme before your very eyes--the oral history of infamous Internet commenters.
10:13-29:58: On to the comics! Graeme wraps up his New52 Zero Issue overview with an examination of the highly remarkable revisions to Tim Drake's history. And Jason Todd's history. And Guy Gardener's history.  And Damien Wayne's history. And Selina Kyle's history.  You may sense a trend here.  (Also there were a few parts where I could've edited out the musings of mystical crow in there, but I didn't.)
29:58-34:28: You know what's not an Issue Zero?  Prophet #29 by Brandon Graham and Farel Darymple.  It is probably Jeff's favorite issue since the reboot, if for no other reason than it nails Space Conan angle he finds so enjoyable.  Graeme is much more coolish on the reboot generally, and that is a thing we rap about at least long enough to provide...
34:28-49:25: The world's greatest segue to what Graeme has been reading:  Jack Kirby's 2001: A Space Odyssey!  In the first of this episode's two dramatic readings, Graeme performs Kirby's text page from the first issue to help make sure our minds are properly blown.
49:25-53:38: So properly blown are our minds, in fact, that Jeff has to get off the phone and call back due to worries about the tech quality of the call.  (Also, it should be noted:  Jeff is recording despite managing to once again strain his back, and so has taken a muscle relaxant to allow him to twist at the hips easily and sit comfortably and other fun stuff that feels more and more like dire necessities once they are taken away.  For extra Whatnaut points, can you determine precisely when the muscle relaxants kick in and make Jeff even more thickheaded and easily baffled?)  We get back, Graeme wraps up talking about Kirby and then moves on to Steve Englehart's '70s run on Dr. Strange.  Us talking admiringly about Englehart is pretty much the free space center spot in the middle of the Wait, What? bingo card, isn't it?
53:38-59:28: Jeff exhorts Graeme to check out Tom Scioli's amazing love letter to Marvel Comics, Final Frontier, a webcomic that starts with a quartet of Fantastic Four analogs giving a farewell concert on the roof of their impressively stacked building, and gets only stranger, wilder, and more hilarious from there.
59:28-1:17:34:  Here's a shocking surprise--Graeme had never heard of Mike Allred's movie, Astroesque!  Jeff saw it fourteen years or so ago, and can kinda remember it?  From there and a consideration of the Allred mystique, it's on to discuss the Cult of the Indy Creator, whether it hurts or helps the artist, and what it might mean for comics and/or Matt Wagner (about which, Jeff has bungled some of the points he's taken from the very keen piece on Wagner by Jason Michelitch over at Hooded Utilitarian ) and/or Gilbert Hernandez.
1:17:34-1:21:12: And from there, we get to Jeff confessing his trepidation about Brandon Graham's Multiple Warheads and Brian Lee O'Malley's upcoming Seconds and why or why not that should be the case.
1:21:12-1:21:58: Graeme has a tender moment alone with you, the listener. (Well, more like thirty-five seconds... but it is very, very tender, so there's that.)
1:21:58-1:30:54:  Then a moment of high drama:  Will Jeff and Graeme remember where they left off?  (They do.) Will they have more to say about the expectations of creators and readers, and their shared responsibility for a work? (Yep.) You must tune in to find out! (Except you don't, see, because I already told you...but that's not to say it isn't interesting listening.)
1:30:54-1:41:48: News time!  It's more than just a thing Jeff tries to get Graeme to talk about while he tries to find a reference. Kirkman! Millar! Ultimate Avengers hardcover! Sale prices at Comixology!
1:41:48-1:47:31: Time for our second dramatic reading--this time it's Jeff, covering that well-known cowboy's lament, Letter from Matt Fraction to Jaime Hernandez in Love & Rockets New Stories #5 (in the key of E).  And maybe we get our new podcast motto out of it?
1:47:31-end: Speed round! (By which I mean, the time of the podcast where we kind of act like we're on speed.)  Jeff likes The New Deadwardians.  He likes it a lot.  Graeme mentions Larime Taylor, an artist who draws comics with his mouth.  And then we spend some time wondering about Morrisoncon, which will be over by the time you ever hear us talk about it. (And once again, we prove which of us is the optimistic one and which the more pessimistic one.)  Also, the return of our special guest-star, information about our upcoming birthdays, and how you can prepare for at least one of us, should you so choose.
Chances are you can still find us on iTunes, sort of, but, hey, there's always, like, here?
As always, we hope you enjoy...and thanks for listening!

Graeme Takes On The New 52. All At Once.

You know, before DC Comics so politely sent me the entire run of the New 52 launch issues, I don't think that I'd ever read an entire month's worth of a superhero universe before. I have to say, it's kind of exhausting. But that doesn't mean that I'm not going to try and run down very quick capsule reviews of all 52 right here, right now, as Fatboy Slim once said many many years ago oh God I am so old. ACTION COMICS #1: In retrospect, maybe my favorite of all 52 books, this one feels like it actually understands how to reboot a concept without overwhelming the reader with information or assuming that they already know everything; Grant Morrison's script has some of his shorthand dialogue, but it's dense and filled with "action" throughout, and this feels like a satisfying chunk of comics that also lays the groundwork for future stories. Very Good.

ALL STAR WESTERN #1: It's heresy amongst the comicsinternet to admit that I'm not a massive fan of Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti's Jonah Hex, but it's never really done a lot for me. That said, this felt solidly Good, setting up the new status quo for the character - and offering enough introduction to the character for new readers - with some really nice art by Moritat. I'm amused by yet another "Gotham is built upon conspiracy and evil" storyline so soon after last month's finale of Batman: Gates of Gotham, though.

ANIMAL MAN #1: Oh, this was so almost good. Jeff Lemire's writing is... good, I think, although I feel like he stumbles on the more domestic side of things here, and I like the subtle repositioning of this series as a horror book. But the art is just not serving the writing well at all; Travel Foreman can be an interesting stylist, but he ruins scenes here, most importantly - and, I think, damningly - the final page, which is robbed of its full impact by some weird staging that basically wastes the top half of the page. Also not helping, the inks by Dan Green (which veer between too heavy and almost weightlessly light) and some very dull, flat colors by Lovern Kindzierski. Eh, then, because of the art.

AQUAMAN #1: Yes, Geoff, I get it: Aquaman isn't a comedy punchline anymore. I would've preferred it if we'd had a chance to decide that for ourselves instead of suffering through the "blogger interview" midway through the book, but overall, this is a pretty Good first issue, setting out its pitch, introducing its characters and having a decent enough hook for the next few issues. That said, if you were reading Brightest Day, you pretty much know what's in here already; this is very much a continuation of what was happening with the character in that book.

BATGIRL #1: I don't know if this was flop sweat or something else, but this just didn't work as well as I'd been expecting it to. Maybe because it's so joyless, something that writer Gail Simone didn't seem to have a problem expressing with the character in Birds of Prey, but there really is something very... rushed and filled and self-important about this issue that made it feel like you were being hurriedly brought up to speed by someone who wanted you to know how serious everything was. World's dumbest cliffhanger, too. Eh.

BATMAN #1: Greg Capullo's art is surprisingly nice - Yes, a little too MacFarlane for my tastes, still, but what can you do? - and Scott Snyder's story is... I don't know. Nice, but somewhat slight, perhaps? I'll be coming back for a second issue, but I think that's more down to goodwill for the creative team than anything having particularly wowed me with this debut. Okay, I guess.

BATMAN AND ROBIN #1: Now this was much more my speed, perhaps because I enjoyed this version of Batman more - One who seems to be dealing with his trauma after X number of years processing survivor guilt as Batman, instead of just burying it - than the one in Batman or Detective (And, really, I can't believe that a linewide reboot didn't result in a slightly more consistent portrayal of Batman. He feels like a different character everytime he appears, like Superman. That doesn't seem like a good thing to me), or perhaps because there was more of an urgency on display here than in Snyder's title. Either way, Good, and a much better "first issue" than the last time Peter Tomasi and Pat Gleason took over the book.

BATMAN: THE DARK KNIGHT #1: Talking of wildly varying characterizations, this book... uh... exists. I don't know what to say about it. If you want a generic Image-style take on Batman, complete with pouty mouths from David Finch and overdone dialogue by Paul Jenkins, this is for you, I guess. I was completely underwhelmed, and laughed out loud as the kids say at the reveal of "One-Face" at the end of the book, especially because he still has half of his face scarred. Awful, but I'm sure it'll have its audience. Oh, and Jaina Hudson is the new Jezebel Jet.

BATWING #1: The first of the "This was much better than I expected" books of the 52, I found myself drawn into this more than I'd thought I would. Maybe it was Judd Winick's take on the character and his secret identity (A cop working outside of the system, because the system is so corrupt), or perhaps it was Ben Oliver's lovely, weirdly hazily dream-like artwork, but this convinced me to try the second issue, which I really wouldn't have thought would've been the case. A low Good, perhaps, but I have to say: This feels much more like a mini-series than an ongoing, already.

BATWOMAN #1: This, however, was a letdown. Not because it wasn't Good, because it was. But I'd been expecting more, spoiled by Greg Rucka's run on Detective. The writing here - by artist JH Williams and co-writer Hayden Blackman - was fine, and hit all the right notes, but didn't surprise me or have the emotional depth that Rucka's had, and the art, while beautiful, also lacked the impact or purpose of the original run. Even though I'll be back for future issues, and even though I enjoyed this, I found myself disappointed nonetheless. That's what I get for having high expectations.

BIRDS OF PREY #1: I'm not sure why, but this felt like it had too much space in it, if that makes any sense. What's here is fine, it's a perfectly Okay comic book, but it feels too empty for some reason, like something is missing. I can't quite put my finger on it, but something isn't quite right, like it's only half of the intended story or something.

BLACKHAWKS #1: I love Mike Costa's Cobra series for IDW, which is why it depressed me so much to realize how much I didn't like this first issue (The art by Graham Nolan and Ken Lashley didn't help; it's overly busy and not quirky enough to make me want to keep paying attention). You can't fault him for throwing the reader in as everything's already happening, but I didn't find any character particularly interesting, mysterious or even distinctive enough to care about, and as a result, the whole thing left me cold. Awful, sadly.

BLUE BEETLE #1: On the podcast, I said this was like the Blue Beetle we had before, but less so. Tony Bedard and Ig Guara make all the right moves, but it lacks the heart or originality to make me want to come back for issue 2. Eh.

CAPTAIN ATOM #1: Hey, everyone who's always wished that there was a Doctor Manhattan solo title spinning out from Watchmen, now you have your dream book. Sadly, it's written by JT Krul - who ruins the goodwill he'd built up from an Okay first issue by ending with a stupid "Is Captain Atom about to die?" cliffhanger (It's his first issue, so I think that question answers itself) - but, on the plus side, the art by Freddie Williams II is very nice indeed. If it gets smarter in future issues, it could end up being worth checking back in with in future, I suspect.

CATWOMAN #1: Oh, man, haven't I said enough about this already? Cheesecakey pandering with a depressingly unsexy tone and annoyingly passive lead character. Awful.

DC UNIVERSE PRESENTS: DEADMAN #1: I swear to God, this is like a black hole in my brain. I have read this book multiple times, and it really refuses to stay in there. Pretty much the definition of Eh for me, although I'll say that Bernard Chang never really gets the credit for his work that he deserves. I'd love to see him paired with less garish colorists sometime.

DEATHSTROKE #1: Fun last-minute twist aside, there's little in this book that appeals: I don't care about the character or the machismo on display, and Joe Bennett has always been hit-or-miss (with an emphasis on the latter) for me. Eh.

DEMON KNIGHTS #1: Punny title aside, Paul Cornell pretty much won me over with the sense of humor on display in this one, much like Jon Rogers did the same in IDW's Dungeons and Dragons book (which this is oddly reminiscent of, it has to be said). Weirdly parochial, but all the better for it. Very Good.

DETECTIVE COMICS #1: Tony "Salvador" Daniel - Has he ever used his middle name before? - aims high and doesn't quite make it, but oh man, can you see him try. There's nothing particularly wrong with this, but there's nothing particularly right, either; it all feels familiar, and more workmanlike than previous attempts. Having Daniel be writer/artist on a Batbook when you also have David Finch doing the same elsewhere in the same franchise feels a bit weird to me, for some reason; I feel like Daniel comes off worse, even though he's better at deadlines and arguably better as a writer, too. Eh, and that's only because I wasn't as appalled by the final page as many were.

THE FLASH #1: After the disappointment of the last Flash run, color me shocked to have enjoyed this as much as I did. Francis Manapul's art is just great - that opening double page splash! The page of Barry in his apartment! - and it turns out that his writing (along with Brian Buccellato) is much faster-paced and more fun than Geoff Johns' on this book. I like the new Barry Allen, and love his relationship to Iris in this new continuity. More of this, please. Very Good.

FRANKENSTEIN, AGENT OF S.H.A.D.E. #1: Another frustratingly "almost" effort from Jeff Lemire - I know where he's going! I just wish he'd made it there! - with equally frustrating art from Alberto Ponticelli, which is just a little too scratchy for its own good (and, like Travel Foreman in Animal Man, a little off in the framing when it really counts). There's a lot to like here, so I'm tempted to put this down to first issue nerves and hope that this book ends up sorting itself out down the line. That said, this is Okay, and I think that the just-finished Xombi played in the same sandbox in a much more entertaining and original way...

THE FURY OF FIRESTORM THE NUCLEAR MEN #1: Of the two Gail Simone books this month, this is the more enjoyable, but it has almost as much crammed into it as Batgirl, leading to a weirdly claustrophobic feeling. That said, I like the new spin on the concept (and the title), and wonder where, exactly, we're going from the end of this issue. Is this going to be DC's second attempt at doing a Hulk book? Yildiray Cinar's art is weirdly reminiscent of Francis Manipul's as far as the inks go, but I'm not sure if it fits here just yet... All in all, an Okay start, but with the potential for either greatness or creative dead-ending within the year.

GREEN ARROW #1: It's as if JT Krul, Dan Jurgens and George Perez set out to create the most generic, boring superhero book imaginable... and succeeded. Crap.

GREEN LANTERN #1: Considering how self-important (and self-conscious) this title had become before the relaunch, it's surprising that Geoff Johns and Doug Mahnke manage to essentially play this first issue for laughs and get away with it. Good, although I found myself wishing that the last page had been held back for a few months, if only because I really enjoyed seeing dick Hal Jordan so much.

GREEN LANTERN CORPS #1: I was always going to be a sucker for this book; John Stewart and Guy Gardner are my favorite Green Lanterns, Peter Tomasi's previous run on the title was something I really enjoyed, and there's no Hal Jordan or Kyle Rayner to harsh my buzz. Sure enough, I really dug this; uberviolent opening aside, I appreciated the "this is where our leads are" intros before the mystery was revealed, and the final page felt weighty and dramatic enough to bring me back next issue. Sure, Fernando Pasarin's art feels like a little bit of a letdown after that Doug Mahnke cover, but it's still pretty great in a "Bryan Hitch but more approachable" way. Very Good, for me.

GREEN LANTERN: NEW GUARDIANS #1: And then there's this. This is just a bit of mess, whether it's the loss of the "some time ago" caption at the opener explaining that the book opens with a flashback, or the failure to really explain who all the different Lantern characters are, it seems sloppy and at odds with the other Lantern books, and Tyler Kirkham's art doesn't necessarily help, either. Awful.

GRIFTER #1: Finally answering that eternal fanboy question "What do you get if you cross Sawyer from Lost with ROM, Space Knight," this is Okay for those of you who enjoy this kind of thing; Nathan Edmonson's script is a bit light on explaining things, but I suspect that's intentional, and CAFU's art seems too polite for the story being told for my tastes. I don't know; there's nothing wrong with it, but there's also nothing that feels especially compelling about it, either, if that makes sense. I think Fringe probably does this kind of thing better, really.

HAWK & DOVE #1: I wanted to like this book so much, and then Rob Liefeld couldn't stop himself reminding me that he's a terrible, terrible artist. Everything happens at crazy angles! People's mouths change size without explanation! Everyone looks permanently in pain because of all the scratches on their bodies! It's a shame, because you get the feeling that Sterling Gates is really trying to work with Liefeld's energy, but he's overwhelmed by it on this issue. Truly, unhappily Awful.

I, VAMPIRE #1: On the plus side, Andrea Sorrentino could pass as fake Jae Lee if the position ever opens up. On the minus side, this is worryingly murky in terms of story (and storytelling; it's not just Joshua Hale Fialkov's script here, the art really does it no favors), and reads like someone's idea of doomed romance a la Twilight, but even more melodramatic. I'm sure there is a massive audience for this, but I found it pretty Eh at best.

JUSTICE LEAGUE #1: Hey, remember when everyone was talking about this book? Well, not much has changed since then. I like it, for what it is; I like dick Hal Jordan, I think there's a reasonably strong mystery introduced and I don't care that the entire team isn't in there despite the cover. But I'd be lying if I said I thought it was more than just Good; there were other books that the relaunch could have led with that seem better suited for all-new readers and a heavy media blitz.

JUSTICE LEAGUE DARK #1: It's not quite Shade Peter Milligan - or, for that matter, Secret Seven Milligan - but there's the potential for getting there with this opener (I really liked the perversity of the Kathy reveal), and Mikel Janin's art is lovely. Slightly underwhelming, I've got a lot of faith that this Good first issue will turn out to be a very good series.

JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL #1: Potentially Green Arrow's main competitor in the "most generic superhero comic" race - And Dan Jurgens is involved with this one, as well! Clearly, this is karma for killing Superman twenty years ago - this just feels like a subpar fill-in to a comic from some point in the 1980s, complete with inexplicable Margaret Thatcher cameo appearance. Considering the potential for a JLI series spinning out of the surprisingly strong Generation Lost mini, this is a tiny bit heartbreaking. Awful.

LEGION LOST #1: The good: Pete Woods' art is just amazing here, really, really great stuff. The bad: Unless you're a Legion fan already, this is likely entirely impenetrable stuff. I love the Legion, and this almost made no sense to me whatsoever. It doesn't help that important things happen off-panel (So, Timber Wolf just picked up the bad guy and no-one tried to stop him?), the characters have no real introduction and just way too much happens to let the reader have any time to make sense of it on first, second or even third reading, because there's not enough space in the book for everything. What it ends up as, then, is a good-looking mess. That's what we call Awful round these here parts.

LEGION OF SUPER-HEROES #1: I've really, really tried to convince myself that New Levitz Legion is just like Old Levitz Legion, but I think this is the issue when I realized I couldn't keep it up. I'm unsure whether it's Levitz or his circumstance, but everything feels so jumpy and fractured that there's no chance - or, it seems, space - to build up the long running soap operatics that I loved the first time around, with everything ending up sacrificed for whatever big storyline that I find myself uninterested in. Eh as much as I wish it were otherwise.

MEN OF WAR #1: Someone, somewhere, found this to be more than some generic "Are you really a man?" cliches wrapped around a superhero mystery, but it wasn't me. Awful, and the back-up strip was even worse.

MISTER TERRIFIC #1: Another book that I really, really wanted to like - Although that's almost entirely down to the original release info containing the hilariously melodramatic line about him fighting "science gone bad!" - and the actual book... kind of lived up to my expectations, perhaps? There's a lot to like here (The new origin, with a time travel mystery replacing the Spectre's telling him "Hey, that white guy? You should rip him off," for example), but it doesn't come together properly, and ends with a cliffhanger that just makes no sense in a first issue ("Is this character acting weird? How would you know! You've just met him. Tune in next month to find out if he is or not!"). But... Again, maybe it's goodwill, but even though this was just Okay, I'm holding out hope for better soon.

NIGHTWING #1: I came to really like Dick Grayson when he was Batman, so why do I find almost everything in his new title feeling like it's a step backwards? Whether it's Dick visiting the circus again, or telling us how good it is to feel like himself, all of it feels more forced and less genuine than it should. Eh, and most of my fondness for the character disappears entirely as he disappears behind a pile of dialogue and sentiment we've heard before.

OMAC #1: If it wasn't for Superboy, this might have been the best surprise of all 52 books. Somehow, Keith Giffen and Dan Didio manage to channel Kirby's sense of fun, if not his sense of originality - This is a reboot of an existing concept, after all - by smooshing together Office Space, the Hulk and the original OMAC to come up with something that feels like it owes as much to Giffen's own Ambush Bug as it does Kirby, and it... weirdly... works. It's very much not for everyone, but I think that's true of the original OMAC as well. It's an odd feeling to think that Dan Didio came up with one of the most individual and arguably the most fun of all of the New 52 books, but there you go. Very Good, and long may it stick around.

RED HOOD AND THE OUTLAWS #1: I think we can also file under "Things I've said too much about," but short version: Not for me even before we hit the "Starfire is an amnesiac bimbo nymphomanic" thing. Crap.

RED LANTERNS #1: If Ed Benes wasn't drawing this book, I have the strangest feeling I would have actually liked it, because Peter Milligan's script - or, more properly, his narration - is weirdly compelling here, and feels oddly subversive to all the Geoff Johnserisms in the scenes surrounding it. If he ends up carrying that further in future issues, I could see this becoming a sleeper hit for the the cool kids who are perfectly okay with women who can twist their bodies to simultaneously show off their butts and their breasts at the same time. Eh, with chances for better later.

RESURRECTION MAN #1: Clearly, it's books dealing with life after death that I have a problem with. Like the Deadman book, this one also barely registers after multiple re-reads. Eh, then.

THE SAVAGE HAWKMAN #1: For everyone who ever thought "What would make Hawkman awesome would be if his armor and wings came out through his pores like Warren Ellis' Iron Man!" then this is apparently the book for you. For the rest of us, this is a book where Hawkman tries to burn his costume for some unknown reason, then gets attacked by it, and then it turns out it's living inside him or something. It really is as bad as it sounds, although Philip Tan's watercolor art is rather nice in places. Awful, though.

STATIC SHOCK #1: It's modern Spider-Man, with the rest of the Milestone universe seemingly playing the supporting cast. It's surprising just how ready I was for that book, without ever realizing it. Good, although I'm already worried about it, now that we know that John Rozum is off the book by #4.

STORMWATCH #1: Like Batgirl, it's possible that this book fails because the writer was far too aware of what they had to do; there's too much empty exposition in this issue, and it's an issue that needed useful exposition. Paul Cornell doesn't quite catch the tone of Warren Ellis' characters, and the disconnect is obvious in a way that isn't obvious; no-one sounds quite right, and everything feels off-kilter as a result. It's a book that simultaneously feels dense and sparse, and Miguel Sepulveda's art, static and heavy, doesn't help with that feeling. A low Eh, and it should be much better.

SUICIDE SQUAD #1: Forget skinny Amanda Waller; this book has way bigger problems. You know, things like an awkward structure (Not helped by multiple artists working on the same issue), a ridiculous set-up and thoroughly flat characterization throughout. Disappointingly Awful.

SUPERBOY #1: I was genuinely surprised by how much this book feels like science-fiction instead of a superhero book, at least in this first issue, and how there's an interesting lack of moral certainty at show just yet (I'm sure that'll change in time). With RB Silva's clean art and Scott Lobdell's strongest script for the relaunch by far, this is Good stuff.

SUPERGIRL #1: This is also surprisingly Good. A complete reboot for the character, and a chance to start from a personality closer to Sterling Gates' work with the character - Probably the character's most recent high point - instead of the wishy-washiness of the origins of the previous version, this issue isn't showy in the slightest, but gets the job done nonetheless.

SUPERMAN #1: Oh, oh, oh. Oh, Superman. I guess, if nothing else, this issue does provide an alternative to Action Comics, mainly in that Action was really good, and this isn't. Where to start? The confusing opening (Is the new Daily Planet built? It would appear so on page 2, but I'm still not sure if that was meant to be a glimpse into the future or not. If it had been rebuilt, would the previous site still have the remains of the old one?), the hilarious scenes of Lois et al discussing journalism ("Print is dying!"), Clark being bitter and mean to Lois, the genuinely horrible examples of Clark's journalism... There is so much wrong with this issue, but primarily I think the underlying structure is the biggest problem: Too much is, again, forced into too small a space, and this time, it's combined with a super brawl that is neither exciting or even interesting, leaving the impression that Superman's life is dull, full of sniping arguments and a ham-fisted idea of how journalism works. It's a mess, and one not saved by Jesus Merino's sterling attempts on art. Awful, and maybe the biggest disappontment of the bunch.

SWAMP THING #1: Talking of wordy, this is another overly-verbose book that could've easily dialed back the exposition to sensible levels and become infinitely better as a result (The whole Superman scene in particular felt unnecessary). That said, like Animal Man, the horror tone works and there's definite potential here. Okay, but greedily, I wanted more.

TEEN TITANS #1: It's a slow start, true, but I'll admit to being sucked in to Scott Lobdell's plan of essentially running one story between this and Superboy - although that final scene in both books has different dialogue and staging in some parts, which seems a completely avoidable mistake to me - and enjoyed this much more than I was expecting from early previews. A high Okay - I still have my issues with Brett Booth's art, I'm sorry - and I might even keep going on this, at least until the entire team is together.

VOODOO #1: You know, deep within this book, there's an interesting idea about an alien invasion happening in plain sight, with the alien as the central character. But getting there in this case means working through a lot of gender politics that's trying to have its cake and eat it at the same time ("Yeah, this is cheesecake, but look, the strippers are real women with class and babysitter problems and shit! But here's some more T&A anyway!"), and... I'm just not interested, ultimately. Awful.

WONDER WOMAN #1: Holy crap, it's the last book. I was beginning to think this would never end. And it's ending on a high note, too; sure, Brian Azzarello's script is sharp and fast-paced (if a little short on explanations, but there's time for those later), but this is entirely Cliff Chiang's show, and he doesn't even vaguely fail to deliver. This is a wonderful looking book - Matt Wilson's colors help considerably - and all the moreso because there's nothing else like it on the DC stands right now. The mythical quality of the story seems on a different scale to all the other New 52 books as well, and the strong individuality of the book makes it feel more like an event... and that's a nice feeling for a Wonder Woman book to have. Very Good, and one of the best books of the line so far.

Now, as the saying goes: What did you think?

Wait, What? Ep. 58.1: The Minor Fall, The Major Lift

Photobucket [Stellar fixed image courtesy of Ron Salas]

Uh, yes.  I am running sorrowfully late again, so I'll have to kinda dash through all this verbal hubbub and let you know the who's who and the what's what:

Basically? It's Wait, What? Ep. 58.1.  It's a little less than an hour.  In it, Graeme and I not only discuss new DC 52 titles like Blue Beetle, Catwoman, Red Hood & The Outlaws (which I called "Red Hood & The Outsiders" which makes more sense but it a mistake), Batman, and Wonder Woman (and more), but also Chester Brown's Paying for It and initial "sweet jeebis, is it pretty!" pre-review impressions of Craig Thompson's habibi. Oh, and there are lots of shrieks from children outside Graeme's window.  (At least he told me they were outside his window....) We apologize about that.

Anyhoo, the 'cast is in iTunes (probably) and you can listen to it here (definitely):

Wait, What? Ep. 58.1: The Minor Fall, The Major Lift

Part two is around the corner, so there's that.

Oh! And, of course, we hope you enjoy and thank you for listening!

nu52 - wk 3: Girls, Girls, Girls!

Mm-hm I'm sure you've already read Laura Hudson's piece, because I'm hardly the first person to link to it, but just in case.... go read it.

 

BIRDS OF PREY #1: Hrm. Well, it didn't totally suck, to be certain, but I also didn't feel it at all. There's a lot of talking about stuff, but little of it made a ton of sense to me. Canary's wanted for murder? Who is this Starling girl? Why is Poison Ivy on the cover of this comic? Isn't BC still a JLer? Or not? Was she ever even seeing Ollie Queen, ever? If not, then what was her original motivation for joining BoP, then? Why did Barbara hand BC a photo of Katana? No, seriously, why didn't she email it? For that matter, why isn't she over the moon interested in joining BC's team?

This was like stepping into a theater 20 minutes after a movie began, then having to leave 40 minutes before it ended. And I don't think I care enough to figure it all out. EH.

 

CATWOMAN #1: Hrm.

OK, well, let's deal with the sex thing first: I don't care if Bruce and Selina have sex... and I generally expect that they do quite often. I don't really need to see it, though, and if I do, I really don't need to see it in all of it's stroky, frotagey, half-costumed glory.

My functional problem with this is that not only are ratings CLEARLY being applied inconsistently cross-line, but they are in no way clearly labeled on the outside of the book, either. You look at the cover of Catwoman #1 and can you immediately discern that, maybe, 8-point type "+" symbol? Now pretend you haven't read a comic book in years, would you even know to look for it?

But here you go: would DC editorial EVER let the reverse of that scene happen in a comic book featuring Batman's name on the cover? Especially in the first issue of a major repositioning? And since that answer is almost certainly "no", this automatically becomes an inappropriate scene.

Honestly, these characters are children's characters, and the fact that we, as mature adults can find enjoyable things about them, it really kind of bugs me how much we making adults-only things that should be accessible to children. More of that a bit later, me thinketh.

Now, having said all of THAT, otherwise I kind of LOVED this comic book -- because I thought the places where it was being sexy (instead of sexual) were just terrific. Recasting Selina as almost a James Bond scenario worked very well, and Guillem March's artwork? Damn, it's nice. Sleek, sensual, dynamic, wow, brother can draw. If it wasn't for nearly the descent into FanFic right there on the last few pages, I'd probably be saying this comic was GOOD. Possibly even VERY GOOD.  But FanFic it became there at the end, and that's just not right for Batman of all characters, and it makes me say instead the whole thing became AWFUL.

 

RED HOOD AND THE OUTLAWS #1:  So, take all of that dialogue read by Starfire in this, and picture it coming from the mouth of this:

Mm.

TINY TITANS comes out the same week as RED HOOD, ironically.

Starfire is not, I don't think, so robust a character as to be able to hang on to two such disparate versions at the same time.

More generally, the rebooting done for Kori here is kind of insane -- she doesn't remember her time on the titans at all? WTF? This Roy Harper is not the robot-armed dead-cat swinger with a mass-murdering terrorist for a babymama? I'm assuming he can't be Ollie Queen's ward any longer, since Ollie appears to be dramatically re-aged. This Red Hood? Who is he? I mean, yes "Jason Todd", but not one we know, since he seems to have all of these connections to some mysterious society of some kind? This is why you need to have origin stories, damn it!

I think that what the JSA was to DC after CRISIS ON INFINITE EARTHS ("Well, we have one world now, but that makes these guys WAY TOO OLD to fight crime now, plus Superman and Batman and Wonder Woman  [among many others touched by JSA] can't have ever been involved in the past, oh my god none of our continuity can make sense any more!") is what the Teen Titans are to post-FLASHPOINT DC continuity. You simply can't have multiple groups  of kid sidekick teams if you're trying to de-age everyone... but those characters are also fairly popular, so they're trying to keep the viable somehow... it's a real knot of a problem, and it's really on display here.

I loathed the continuity changes on display here, and don't find them in service of creating more appealing characters or more interesting situations. The "hey my head looks like a penis" jokes were amusing, I guess, but other than that, nothing here that I'd want to read. Sadly AWFUL.

 

SUPERGIRL #1: This one is an origin, at least, but frustratingly decompressed, so that really "she lands and beats on some guys in robot suits" is really the sum of your $3 purchase. Not poorly done, but less than I wanted for my ducats. EH.

 

WONDER WOMAN #1: Right, so I have a fellow member of Ben's school PTA who got sucked into the DC relaunch, probably because he's on the PTA with me, y'know? Long-ago lapsed reader (like from when he was a teenager), and today he's a tech geek with disposable income, kind of the perfect demographic they're aiming at. Anyway, he's been excited for weeks for Wonder Woman #1, because he was really really looking forward to sharing it with his eight year old daughter.

So, it really kind of killed me when I had to inform him that, in no way, could WW even slightly be considered appropriate for his daughter. Not with graphic on-camera beheading of a horse, where a new creature claws it's way out of the horse's fountaining neck.

Just what girls like!

The thing is? That scene, IMO, could have happened exactly as written, yet been drawn in such a way that it didn't immediately make itself inaccessible to the nation's 8 year olds.

You may certainly call me an old grandmother, but I firmly am of the opinion that monthly ongoing comics featuring Batman, Superman, Green Lantern, the Flash, Wonder Woman, and Aquaman should be freely no-hesitation accessible by imagery for eight year olds and younger. That doesn't mean the stories have to be WRITTEN FOR an eight year old -- few of the comics *I* was reading in 1975 were -- but a kid should be able to LOOK at them without having nightmares (well...), or offending their parents.

Having said that, I really loved WW #1 -- great strong script from Brian Azzarello, loverly art by Cliff Chiang, and what appears to be an interesting contemporary direction. As a comic for ME? An easy VERY GOOD.

But I'd like my PTA cohort's daughter, and, hell, everyone's daughter, also be able to look at the comic too. That isn't too much to ask, is it?

 

As always, what do YOU think?

-B

 

 

 

7 Questions about Images On the Internet of the Final Pages of Catwoman #1

SPOILER WARNING.

According to the internet, the final pages of CATWOMAN #1 by Judd Winick and Guillem March focus upon a tenderly erotic scene of The Batman and Catwoman having aggressive sex, which is apparently a thing that they show in the comics these days.

So, after looking at these images-- and/or having stared longingly, however you want to phrase it... (and not having read any other comics lately to write about for this site since I'm not really reading comics at the moment, for various my-time-is-limited reasons not worth getting into here)... but so, yeah:   I have questions.

Here's an image of one panel, courtesy of Scans_Daily--

Question One.  When Catwoman says "Still... it doesn't take long...", what does that line mean exactly?  Is she... Is she implying that The Batman orgasms really fast, like right away, like maybe even in his bat-underwear?

I don't know-- on the one hand, I'd like to think that The Batman would have more control than that because ... because he's super-aware of his body or he has super-discipline over his body, after being trained by ninjas and Liam Neeson.
On the other hand, The Batman's a regular guy and maybe we should all accept that, you know, that's a thing that happens to regular guys, especially if they've had a couple Zima's, and they're young and they're not really sure what's going on, and they don't really like the Daves Matthews Band but one of their songs is playing and why am I crying?

My point is The Batman's not Superman-- the very fact he's not invincible  is what makes him The Batman instead of  Superman, right?  So if we agree that's the fundamental appeal of The Batman is his inherent vulnerability, then maybe The Batman having a problem with premature ejaculation, maybe that makes him ever more The Batman.

 

 

Question Two.  Why is Catwoman tweaking his Bat-ears with her hands?  Does she think he can feel that?  What is going on there? Do people who live in the DCU think The Batman has a deformed skull or...?  What is that?

And since this is a thing that happens in real life-- since you know and I know that people have definitely, definitely, definitely dressed up in those costumes and had sex in the bathroom of comic conventions, at least Dragon*Con because that one's in Hotlanta and the heat and the sweat and the Bat-a-rangs, it's probably just like that movie Body Heat except ever so slightly more Batmanish... when that happens in real life,  do you think teasing the Bat-ears is a thing that, like, the guy actively requests?  "Play with the Bat-ears."  Am I the only one who hears that in their head when they look at that image?  And also: how do I stop hearing that oh god how do i stop hearing it?

Question Three.  Here we have the cliffhanger of the comic, which is The Batman having his nipples played with.  Why are people who create Bat-comics so fixated on his nipples?

The classic Neal Adams shot-- The Batman, shirtless, nipples surrounded by thick swaths of chest hair...

... to the present, with Chris Sprouse and Grant Morrison, and nipples.  At the outset of his run, Morrison promised fans a return to the "hairy-chested love god" years of Adams, Bat-nipples thus pivotal to the early promotional efforts for his run...

Can you think of any major film franchise that has ever been as defined by its main character's nipples as Batman has?  Think of poor Joel Schumacher.  If you google "Schumacher" and "Batman" and "nipple," you get 241,000 results.  If you google "Schumacher" and "Tigerland" (i.e. the Veitnam-era drama that Schumacher directed, in which he arguably discovered Colin Farrell)... I only get 140,000 results.  Joel Schumacher's entire film career has Batman's nipples inexorably at its center, like a tittified Scylla and Charybdis. (If Joel Schumacher has a third nipple, let's agree to call it Rudolph).

At what point when you're deep in the Batman mythology, deep in the lore, at what point does the siren song of The Batman's nipples drag you to a watery grave? I ask you.

I note here, for the record, that when The Batman was defeated by Bane in the 90's, the Knightfall creators were certain to show you Bane's nipples on the comics' cover, as if to suggest that only a villain with larger nipples than Batman was man enough to defeat The Batman.

Question Four. If you have a problem with this scene, if you're not a fan of this scene-- if this were drawn better and written better, would this have worked for you?  Is the problem for you one of CONCEPT or EXECUTION?  In the words of Val Kilmer in the Oscar-winning film Real Genius, "would you qualify that as a launch problem or a design problem?"

(My pet theory is that for a sex scene in comics, you want to go with smaller panels.  See, Chaykin's work in American Flagg #3, your better scenes from Guido Crepax, Fantastic Four #23, the Steranko Nick Fury/Contessa scene, etc.  Pet theory.  Creepy, creepy pet theory.)

Question Five. As part of this whole DC-Nu 52, whatever this is called, this is probably one of the most  heavily advertised and promoted comics that Judd Winick has written in recent memory, since at least 2000's Pedro & Me. Every  issue of the DC-Nu launch titles is being reviewed a million times over, by every comic site under the sun, this one included.  Plus, video interviews on MTV's website ("We're getting back to the essence of what Catwoman is")(?).  Plus, TV commercials, media coverage, etc.  And yet, in response to that opportunity, this is the direction Winick went in-- exploitation fare that might get a certain kind of fan talking, rather than attempting to sell himself as a writer of any substance.

Question: if Winick tomorrow were to try to launch a serious, artistic series, after his career at DC, after material like the foregoing, an original series which he tried to sell as the effort of a quote-unquote "real" writer, would you be willing to ... to "believe" him?

You know, Winick's doing his job.  This will probably sell some comics-- it's my recollection that there was a decent-sized audience in the 90's for sexy crap, and since most of the DC relaunch is rooted in the 90's aesthetic... Heck, might work; might work.  But can you put your name on this kind of thing and remain untainted by it?  A lot of people in comics-- they're doing the jobs of selling comics. Sometimes, maybe that job's not so pretty.  To be honest, I think of Judd Winick as being a joke... but maybe I think that based upon material that to some extent calls for him to be a joke...? Are you able to separate that out when-- when they ask you to?  I know with other people, I've struggled with that; I've had that reaction of "Oh, now you really mean it; well, ain't I lucky", and so.

But this is how the guy used this bigger stage he's on, so maybe any ambition in Winick died a long time ago; maybe the question is moot.  On the other hand, he states in interviews that the defining characteristic of his writing is "edginess" (!), so maybe hope springs eternal.

Related: when you imagine them creating this scene, do you imagine those inset panels zooming in on Batman's hand were in some kind of script, all typed out, or added in by an artist trying to find ways to "spice up" the scene?  Which is worse?  Is there any way to say that one of those things is worse than the other in this particular case?

Question Six.  Why does the Batman have to be such a shitty fuck-buddy to Catwoman?  "Angry" and "gives in"--?  Why can't the Batman just be a fucking cool bro, like Ashton Kutcher in that one movie, instead of hate-fucking broken girls?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NbDEconEcAM

Is it that fans want The Batman to, like, punish crime with his cock?

Question Seven.  So, we have some images that seem to have been designed to "get people talking", and here I am talking about them.  To what extent am I complicit? To what extent have I tainted myself by association?  With every "you're wasting all of our time creating worthless shit" greeted with "the fact you care we make terrible shit incessantly is proof that we've done the job of making you care," how much am I myself guilty of distracting you from your life?

Some Comics from 8/25

Less time than I thought this week -- too much message boarding (How does any of those incessant Newsarama posters get ANYthing done in real life? Do they just post on their boss' dime all day or something? Are they all pale 13 year olds who never see the sun? Someone should do a study!), plus, last night our Television went out so we need to go buy a new one this morning. So just a quick couple of reviews so, y'know, they don't take my blogging rights away from me. By the way, do I need to insert possible spoiler warnings for the below? Or is it just assumed?

WORLDWATCH #1: If I know you well enough, you have really been missing a superhero comic with dialogue like Hero: "Face down -- Hands behind your back, jerkoff!" Villian: "Who you calling jerkoff, you bondage whore!!". I know you've wanted a comic where female characters lounge around with their shirts off on almost every page, where there's frank talk about sex, about superhero webcams, where one hero jerks off watching another pair couple. Yes, you've wanted this forever... but where could you get it? Where and from who? Must your life be an endless torment of despair and anguish as you can't find this certain one thing you've always secretly wanted?

Well, suffer no more, true believer! Chuck Austen feels your special pain, and he's here with the solution to all of your dark shameful little desires. Yes, it's WORLDWATCH -- the "mature" take on superheroes! Move over Watchmen! Step aside Authority! THIS IS WHAT THEY WANT!

Come on, where else are you going to hear an exchange like this: Male hero: "So, technically.... you're DEAD?" Female Hero: "Not in bed." YESSSSSSSSSSS! Excuse me, something has come up... if you know what I mean!

Awful.

ULTIMATE ELEKTRA #1: Meanwhile, on the other side of things, here's a comic predicated on gripping money laundering action! Oooh, hot! Elektra doesn't actually appear in this comic, at least not in the costumed sense. Which is fine with me, but this is probably too cerebral for anyone who normally follows the character. A strong OK.

CATWOMAN #34: Big reveal this issue -- turns out everything is Steph's fault. Which, when I first read it, made me go "Wow, that's clever!", but then I thought about it for a few minutes and decided that it was, instead, rather stupid. She's not be trained enough to know who Matches Malone is, yet she can take a secret destroy all crime from the bat-computer? And, wait, Batman doesn't recognize HIS OWN PLAN? Does that seem likely? And anyway, Matches is meant to take over the gangs? I thought the whole POINT of Matches was that he was an anonymous low level hood? Not boss-level, to be sure! I liked it as I was reading it, and I thought the coloring looked terrific on the nice art.... but I can't do more than a strong OK, because the end is so implausible.

BATMAN #631: I don't know that I really buy "Gasp! Batman murdered that girl!" at all -- this isn't Year One, after all. Plus, what's up with those panels where it looks like Batgirl (I think) snapping those guys necks? *shrug* A low OK.

GREEN LANTERN #180: First we get Dead Girlfriend in the Fridge, now we get Dead Mom in the Oven. Blech! Hey, and did anyone notice how Kyle (accidentally, I'm sure!) ended up desecrating his mother's warm corpse by blowing up the entire house? Neat! More one dimensional than the pages it is printed on. Awful.

SUPERMAN #208: A marginal improvement over the first few parts, but I still don't really get what's going on with "the vanishing" or what it means, or what caused it, or why I should care, or, really, anything. But, hey, at least the League looks cool. Eh.

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #511: Oddly enough, JMS and Deodato doing MARY JANE'S THEATER ADVENTURES might be an interesting comic -- it held my interest more than the "You got your DNA in my peanut butter!" a-story, that's for sure. OK.

ASTONISHING X-MEN #4: While I'm a little bugged that Piotr is back (OR IS HE?!?!?!), mostly because he was the first of the "No, 'dead' MEANS 'dead'!" characters of the Quesada regieme, Kitty's reaction to same was super precious and makes up for a world of annoyances. I liked it: Very Good.

OK, out of time -- more later tonight, I hope.....

-B

Polishing off the 8/4 comics

Just a few things to go, then I'll do the books post... LOVE AND ROCKETS v2 #11: Like I said, I don't "get" L&R, but are Jaime and Gilbert just excellent cartoonists? There are panels throughout each story that I like to just stare at. I especially liked bits from "Life Through Whispers". I just don't get the stories at all. Still, aesthetically, hard to say less than Good.

GUARDIANS #2: This is probably moving a lot slower than it should (page 2 and the plot is just starting?) but the art is nice and the characterizations are strong. I don't really care what happens, really (especially for $3 a throw), so let's call it OK.

WOLVERINE / PUNISHER #5: Hard to imagine a more phoned-in script, but, Christ, it's Wolverine & Punisher, I suppose I shouldn't expect Dostoevsky. Still, the story doesn' t end as much as stop, and practically promises a sequel. Big waste of my 5 minutes reading time. Crap.

X-MEN UNLIMITED: The juggernaut story was cute I guess (Except, um, what's up with the hearts in the last panel? Scott and Juggy have made a love connection? Ew!), but the Emma/Logan story didn't hang together than well. Overall, call it Eh.

ENGINE HEAD #4: I tried to read this twice, and I'm still not sure I understood what is going on. I usually like McKeever's art, but it seems unfocused here. Sorry: Awful.

BATMAN / CATWOMAN: TRAIL OF THE GUN: Generally, I have to say, if you gave me a choice, I'd ask to read stories, not one-sided screeds. I favor gun control, and could barely stagger through the polemics of this. Those 5 pages of super-extreme violence upfront were nasty, rather than affecting. Plus, let's be serious, the central idea of the story is inane -- a gun that "never misses"? What, it's telepathic? That sequence where they guy fires a burst IN THE AIR and the bullets circle around to hit 3 different people? Even with comic book physics that's preposterous. Why wouldn't the bullets circle around and hit the firer? Why wouldn't they all go after one target? Sheesh. Plus the whole concept that trying to find the prototype would mean anything? Hello, if such a thing exists, they have the plans to make more. Sheesh. The only saving grace here is Ethan Van Scriver's art, which in a few places is a breathtaking joy to behold. The horror in Selina's posture in what I'll call the mascara pages is really powerful. Too bad, it was in service to such a shitty shitty polemic. Crap.

There you go. Give me an hour or so to come back and do the books....

-B

Strong!

Something they don't tell you about babies -- the little beasts are STRONG. Ben can easily haul 150% of his weight, and I'm scared he'll figure out what a fulcrum is.  The real problem, though, is that they have NO IDEA they are strong -- they use their full strength all of the time because, well, why wouldn't you? Me and Tzipora have little welts all over our bodies when Ben has given us a hard pinch while trying to climb somewhere.

While I'm going to try to review "everything" for the next few weeks, once I've cycled through a whole month, I'll probably drop back to "items of significance". Are you liking this format, by the way? Should I change anything? Add publisher credits, maybe? Opinions!

SINGULARITY 7: Ben Templesmith's new book and it's really pretty to look at. Sure, the story is pretty much a warmed over 21st century Dawn of the Dead meets Terminator, and, yes, his scripting is a little overwrought in places, but it's damn fine to look at, and the story problems don't get in the way of enjoying it. I also like that he's using a brighter palette than in 30 Days of Night -- this is Good stuff.

TAROT #27: And we veer ever closer to Bondage Fairies territory.  I'm continually stunned by the contrast of the messages of the comic compared to the ones in the editorial section. Reading Tarot always makes me feel like I'm a robot in "I, Mudd"... "But if you are telling the truth, then it must be a lie, but if you are lying, then you must be telling the truth. Norman.... coordinate! *fzzzt*" Awful, but I don't think you can judge this on the same scale of a real comic...

POWERLESS #2: It's a What If...? story, I guess, but it suffers from too-many-ingredients-itis. Honestly, less is more, and having this span the entire Marvel Universe-yet-not just gives me a headache. Nice art by Gaydos, but I didn't care about a single page of the 22. Eh.

BATMAN #630: While "last stand in the Batcave" is a good idea (and not one especially overused, really), it's probably better to save it for something of more significance than the (*shudder*) "Scarebeast". I suppose it's a stab at trying to solve the "Wait, what the fuck can we do with the Scarecrow, anyway? He's a sub-one-trick pony!" problem, but turning him into a version of the Hulk who says "Are you scared yet"? Nah, not the path to have gone. Other than Wagner's covers, I've really disliked this arc. Awful.

LEGION #36:  Something bad happens, something else bad happens, another bad thing happens.... did Gail steal Bendis' notes for Avengers? Waiting for motivations, or rationales or something to make it a mystery or a story rather than just a series of events. Part of the problem is that events are too big -- any humanity becomes a sidenote, rather than the focus like good fiction. It's not badly done, no not at all, but it sorta feels like plothammer more than anything else. OK.

AVENGERS #500: See Legion #36. Though I'll also say that I think the coloring was way too dark because on top of "busy" artwork, it's often difficult to tell what's going on. OK.

USAGI YOJIMBO #77: Stan Sakai is a master cartoonist. And he gets better at his craft every year. Simple, clean storytelling, action every few pages, honest humanity, and a strong eye for humor and terror equally, it's hard to say there's a better comic being produced each and every month than Usagi. If people want to do comics activism, here's an excellent book for you to start with. Excellent.

NAUGHTY BITS #40: And this would have been a good one too, but unfortunately this is suddenly the last issue. That's a damn shame because Roberta Gregory is not only a fine cartoonist, but she's produced 40 issues which is a whole lot better than most "indy" books could hope for. I also really liked Robert Triptow's gay wedding comedy in the back of the book. Very funny stuff. Very Good.

(Marvel Knights) 4 #8:  As a comedy it falls kinda flat (The Watcher bookends were wretched), but as a character piece it's OK, I guess. In a week I'll have forgotten I've ever read it, though. Eh.

CATWOMAN #33: Not quite a fill-in, but it feels like marking time because of next quarter's crossover. It's a solid-enough story, but in the end it doesn't feel like it matters much. OK

SLEEPER V2 #2: This on the other hand, worked like a charm. "Now can I stop breaking your heart?" Wonderful stuff on both an action and human level. Very Good.

OK, time to go off and work at the store! Restock, hurray!

-B