Halfway to something

COUNTDOWN TO FINAL CRISIS #26: First off, someone needs to smack that logo around a bit, because it sure looks like "Countdown to Anal Crisis" to me! This issue is exposition-heavy, but at least makes it seem like something has been going on all of this time. Too bad the previous 25 issues weren't anywhere near this engaging.

But I have a question -- if, in fact, the very act of travelling between worlds causes stress on the Source Wall, which will eventually destroy the multiverse, then isn't "The Bad Monitor" just as culpable as anyone he's chasing around? Further, where are these "Town Halls" taking place? Aren't these 51 other Monitors stressing the Source Wall just as much every time they get together? Isn't this their third or fourth meeting at this point?

Plus, look at that splash page again -- I count WAY more than 51 Monitors in that room; even giving some allowance to Mickey Mouse Ears and two-headed Monitors, there are still at least 63 figures, by my count...

Anyway: its got nowhere to go but up, but still we're sadly AWFUL.

COUNTDOWN PRESENTS: LORD HAVOK AND THE EXTREMISTS #1: Well, almost worth it for Liam Sharpe drawing monstrous and hulking figures, but who really gives a fart for Marvel analogues, where the villains won? It just smells like Cash In to me, and was pretty AWFUL

COUNTDOWN TO ADVENTURE #3: I guess the lead Lady Styx returns story is OK-ish, but I'm not very sympathetic to any of these characterizations (I mean, seriously, Buddy maybe being in live with Kory? Really?!?); the Forerunner story where she goes to the Justice League of Magicians world is an interesting scenario, but it basically rendered uninteresting because of how quickly they kick her ass (not much of a badass eh?), and how dull of a antagonist "Dark Angel" is. EH, overall.

COUNTDOWN TO MYSTERY #2: Quite liked the Dr. Fate portion, but the Eclipso stuff was pretty terrible. A very low EH on that one.

This deluge of COUNTDOWN stuff really working against the books, I think.

What did YOU think?

-B

It's enough to give someone a Complex: Graeme looks like Jesus, so they say.

Considering my recent X-Men reading frenzy has included Ed Brubaker's first two forays into mutant territory, Deadly Genesis and The Rise and Fall of The Shi'Ar Empire, it's only fitting that his first chapter of the first big X-crossover in years, X-MEN: MESSIAH COMPLEX #1 turns out to be a reminder of all things good and bad about the whole Xavier kit and kaboodle.

The good includes the slightly scary way in which Brubaker is able to write the characters in character; like Mike Carey over on X-Men, Ed somehow manages to channel his inner Claremont in the exchanges between the title characters in such a way as to make them seem more like themselves than they have in years - Even Whedon and Morrison's takes weren't as faithful or familiar as they appear here. Whether this signposts a good writer able to adapt or the product of a fanboy youth is open to question, but between the characterization and a plot that harkens back to the glory days of the franchise, complete with Professor Xavier discovering a new mutant and the heroes racing to reach them before the bad guys do, it's an enjoyable trip down memory lane. There's something about the core idea - that there is a new mutant at all, as opposed to the melodrama and depression of the oncoming extinction of the entire race - that appeals as well, a reminder of when it wasn't all relentless doom-and-gloom for these characters.

On the minus side, there's still a confusion of characters on display here without adequate introduction (despite the pin-ups with mild commentary in the back of the book - and Predator X? Really? Bring back the Brood; at least their names didn't have that damn letter in there), and unclear motivations for all involved with the exception of the heroes. It's not necessarily a massive problem, of course; this is the first chapter of thirteen, so there's a lot of time to get everything sorted out, but I can't help but feel worried by how similar it all feels to the opening chapter of the mutant massacre storyline years ago, which took years to explain away (A similarity helped by the presence of Marc Silvestri, who got to draw the first Mister Sinister appearance way back when, his art not that much better twenty years later).

In a weird way, it's such an X-book that it's difficult to grade - If you like X-Men books, then it's Very Good. If you don't, then it's an Okay example of modern superhero books nonetheless.

Like Rain On Your Wedding Day: Diana Considers The Book That Has No Future, 10/31

This one goes out to Keith Giffen. You wanted snark; snark ye shall have! MIDNIGHTER: ARMAGEDDON #1 is the latest attempt to revitalize Wildstorm, which - at this point - is soggier than a Jim Balent comic in the hands of a teenager. The imprint's great thinkers, whose vast intellect has brought them to the state of near-collapse they're currently enjoying, have decided that the response to widespread apathy is to tease the destruction of the universe. Don't like Wildstorm? Good news! For fifty bucks, you can watch the whole thing get blown up (maybe)!

I guess my main problem with this issue, and with the underlying premise of this so-called event, is that I've already seen the blasted landscape/dead heroes/everything's crap future. I've seen it in X-MEN, I've seen it in HULK, I've seen it a thousand times... and I'm tired of it. At some point, it's become the default standard whenever anyone wants to depict a future dystopia. Oh, London got crushed by a giant spaceship! Millions of people are dead! A bunch of heroes went missing! Nobody knows what happened! Bleh. Show me a future where Doctor Phil is elected President, or where masses of defenseless humans are forced to watch hourly broadcasts of the Tila Tequila show. That's scary.

What's worse, there's zero dramatic investment in this particular future. Aside from purely cosmetic changes, Midnighter's crew remains more or less the same stereotypiriffic (take that, Mary Poppins!) cutouts they were before. It certainly doesn't help that the characters themselves shrug off Midnighter's apocalyptic vision with about the same lack of interest I feel when I get the latest Britney Spears update. "She got visitation rights? That's nice. The world is doomed? Yes, dear."

Ironically, this future-themed issue has no future to speak of: numbering aside, it's a one-shot (there's no MIDNIGHTER: ARMAGEDDON #2), and I doubt anyone who reads this actually believes Wildstorm is going to shake up its status quo so much. Come to think of it, didn't we already do this Armageddon thing with Captain Atom a while back? The thing is, even if Wildstorm has the stones to actually do something drastic this time, that's still an acknowledgement that the imprint has been so badly screwed up that only a cosmic Ctrl+Alt+Del can fix things. And, to be blunt, that's not the sort of tactic one should rely on too often. It would be more creative and rewarding to work with what you've got rather than toss it all out and start from scratch... but then, creativity and reward rarely synch up at Wildstorm, if this whole Worldstorm abortion is any indication.

AWFUL. Go ahead, Jim Lee, nuke 'em all. See if I care. (Hint: Probably not.)

"I guess all some guys need is a good dump. In their pants." Jog has a 10/31 treat for you

I had a pretty great Halloween, for two major reasons. First: my younger sister stuffed her dog into a bumblebee costume, and took a picture of it. That is the authentic soul of summer's end. Second: gummies and needles. Natural allies. We all exchanged candy at the office, and then I went right across the street for a flu shot. Holiday spirit flooded my body through the mouth and the arm, and I saw the Great Pumpkin.

Although... I dunno, I guess maybe I expected a little more from a Halloween flu shot room. Like, mummies and werewolves waving syringes around to the Monster Mash or something. Was I unrealistic?

Special Forces #1 (of 6): Kyle Baker's new miniseries is an Iraq War comic. More specifically, it's the Iraq War as a Frank Miller comic. Or, at least a modern action comic written via the Frank Miller paradigm of terse captions, waves of violence and an against-the-odds heroic ethos. It's an ingenious conceit, framing the conflict in widely-adopted aesthetic terms dictated by comics' top-selling hawk, as a means of creating disquieting absurdity. And I'm 95% sure I've seen an ad for this with a Miller pull quote on it. Was I dreaming?

The story is simple - the war is so shitty that anyone can get recruited, including an autistic boy, and a tough girl whose first day of high school had her facing life in prison. They and others go off to battle, and everyone I didn't just mention dies in intestine-spilling fashion on the way to capture an insurgent leader. Can the pair survive?!

Sometimes the tale's telling recalls older, gung ho war comics (some really nice limited color is used, along with a great sense of realist-cartoon exaggeration), as conveyed in modern terms. Other times, it directly targets more recent styles, what with its outrageously sexualized ‘tough’ heroine coughing out narration like "I listen. RIP! Bullet. CRACK! Gun. RIP CRACK. Echo." There's a splash of her laying in a pile of debris that's like Miller to the 100th power without really looking like his art very much. Kinda kicked my ass, that.

Granted, I don't know quite where Baker plans to go with this. It veers wildly from tone to tone, dipping into soppy melodrama and awful prime time sitcom shtick, only to hide some great, droll humor in the middle of caption flurries. But an irresistible premise can carry a first issue, and this is a VERY GOOD starting point.

Da da da daaaaa, da da da da daaaaa: Graeme is still sick, and sick of Countdown.

So, now that Countdown has reached its halfway point, with the release of COUNTDOWN TO FINAL CRISIS #26 this week - Hey, new title to remind people that there's a point to all of this, and that point has Grant Morrison and JG Jones involved! - it's probably time to look back on the last six months and look at what we've learned from the experience so far.

Namely, Countdown? Kind of a mess.

The main thing, I guess, is that DC learned none of the right lessons from 52. Well, that's probably not true from DC's point of view, I guess; they learned that weekly books could sell, for one thing. But almost everything else that was right about 52 has been wrong with Countdown, it seems. This is potentially a dangerous point of view - rose-colored glasses and all that - but, as loathe as I am to remember 52 as something better than it was, it was at least more successful, and more interesting in its failings, than Countdown has come close to in the last 26 weeks.

Part of that, I think, comes down to the talent involved in creating the two series.
In the early stages of publication, 52 worked it wasn't just the novelty of the "weekly book" idea that drew readers in initially, but the fact that it was being written by DC's four biggest writers working together. Because of the democratic, messy, way that they wrote the book, the work itself managed to keep some of each writer's voice, and as a result became this oddly quirky, occasionally subversive, take on a corporation's flagship title. Countdown, on the other hand, has not only gone for a more mid-level writing staff, but a top-down method that's given no one writer ownership over any particular storyline, and produced slow pacing and dialogue that practically define the term generic; it's as if the writers are all so nervous about coming off-model that they don't try to create any model at all. It's playing so safe - which may be a necessity for a project this size - that it lacks the spontaneity to keep attention, while the weekly round-robin schedule makes sure that as a whole it lacks the continuity of quality (or even the quality in general) to make you sit up and notice a bad job done very well.

And don't even ask me about the artists on the series until Carlos Magno realizes how big people's heads are supposed to be in proportion to their bodies.

But back to the book itself: One of the few things besides format that Countdown took from 52 is focusing on minor characters to base the stories around... except that, unlike 52, the stories aren't about the characters themselves (I'd argue that only the space heroes thread in 52 was plot-based instead of character-driven; your mileage, as they say on the internet, may vary) but about Big Events that the characters just so happen to blunder into (the Piper/Trickster thread in particular being the worst offender - The Flash's death! Black Canary/Green Arrow wedding! Salvation Run! The one good thing you could say about the Mary Marvel plot is that at least it seems to be its own thing...).

...Which, of course, leads into the unavoidable fact that you have to buy multiple other series in order to understand what Countdown's all about. It's not just that things like the death of the Flash, Amazons Attack! or the Black Canary/Green Arrow Wedding Special displace the series' main plots for large chunks of issues at a time, but that those main plots from the series then end up spinning out into different books - The Death of The New Gods, The Search For Ray Palmer, the back-up strips in Countdown to Adventure and Mystery, Salvation Run and Gotham Underground, to date - that contain chunks of information that really should be in the main series (Well, maybe not the Search for Ray Palmer books). There's no real there there for Countdown; no arc or theme that you can point to and say that that's what the series is about, other than "A lot of stuff is happening and most of it is bad."

(Another problem with this is that Countdown has also managed to ruin a couple of reveals in other books; we saw Black Adam here repowered before the debut of the miniseries that asks whether he'll ever get his powers back, and we also saw Kyle Rayner-post Sinestro Corps War while the core Green Lantern books were pretending that he'd never be back.)

This brings up one of the biggest problems with the series; if it's really counting down to another book altogether, then that gives the creators a pretty big headache: How do you wrap up a 52-part series that, by design, has no conclusion? The cheap answer would, I'm sure, be to point out that it's not that big of a deal considering that the series hasn't really had a great deal of forward motion so far to pay-off, but I'm wondering if the slow-as-molasses plot development isn't the result of being unsure where and how the plots are going to end, and trying not to get too involved in something that may end up going nowhere. The alternative to this, of course, is that all of Countdown's plots are going to resolve in the series, and not really lead into Final Crisis at all, which - while making the title somewhat untrue - may be the more preferable option for the readers.

Overall? It's been a series where there hasn't been twenty-six issues of plot, but it's felt like more than six months to get to where we are so far. Every week, I read the latest issue and hope against hope that it's going to have gotten better, and every week, I get saddened by the fact that it's still pretty Crap.

I Dismember Halloween: Douglas jumps the gun on 10/31

Since I'd thoroughly enjoyed 52, and especially the storyline that involved Renée Montoya and the Question, Greg Rucka was kind enough to pass along some photocopies of the first two issues of 52 AFTERMATH: THE CRIME BIBLE: THE FIVE BOOKS OF BLOOD. (I may have the title wrong: some sources say "Lessons" rather than "Books," and I haven't seen a finished copy yet.) The first one, drawn by Tom Mandrake, comes out today; despite the fact that she's not mentioned anywhere in its tripartite title, this is the new Montoya/Question story, and it's really satisfying to see Rucka writing her again. For those of you who didn't follow 52, one of the odder additions it made to the DC universe was the idea that there's a religion of crime that has its own Bible. We saw fragments of it in that series (where Montoya's investigation of its links to an Apokolips-related scheme began), and it's also quoted in passing in the Keith Giffen-written 52 Aftermath: Four Horsemen miniseries. The venerated figure in this religion is, naturally, the original criminal, Cain, who's referred to as the First. It's worth pointing out that Cain himself is actually a recurring character in the DCU; we haven't seen him lately, but we saw the House of Mystery he maintains in 52. We also saw allusions in 52 to the Book of Moriarty and the Book of Kürten, both of which reappear here, the latter rather prominently; Moriarty was, of course, Sherlock Holmes's nemesis (and is also an in-continuity character in the DCU!), and Kürten was an early-20th-century German serial killer.

A bit of this issue is given over to some necessary exposition: a professorial character, Stanton T. Carlyle, notes that the crime religion is prima facie ridiculous, and also explains that the Crime Bible concludes in four homiletic "Books of Blood," based on the pillars of deceit, lust, greed and murder. (I wonder if Carlyle's first name comes from Question creator Steve Ditko's former studiomate and occasional collaborator Eric Stanton--link potentially NSFW.) This would be the "deceit" issue, hence its twist-ending structure, and if you've noticed that there's a numerical disjunction between the concept in the story and the title of the miniseries, bingo; I'm assuming there's some kind of hermetic-gnostic fifth Book we'll find out about. Mandrake's specialty is establishing a shadowy, uncertain mood--in some ways, he's the closest thing to Gene Colan working regularly in comics now--and that fits nicely with the theme of the issue, too. (The big twist two pages before the end, though, is drawn with a peculiar gimmick that doesn't really work.)

The Question, in the Denny O'Neil incarnation that Rucka's taken after, is a detective whose investigations extend outward and inward: he (and now she) is interested in understanding complicated systems more than solving mysteries, as such, and one of those systems is his (and now her) own inner self. What Charlie kept asking Montoya in 52 was "who are you?"; she's still figuring that out. (Incidentally, if you're interested in this stuff and haven't read Rucka's interviews about the Question at the dedicated fan site vicsage.com, they're pretty fascinating.) As in the O'Neil series, she has neither a real face nor a full identity; nobody ever refers to the Question by that name, except indirectly. Carlyle asks "Are there any questions?"; Montoya steps forward.

The premise of 52A:TCB:T5BOB--and doesn't that sound like a good name for a designer drug?--is that the crime cultists think the new and not-fully-formed Question might in fact have potential as one of them (their religion includes a "parable of the faceless"). One of their leaders, a guy by the name of Flay (which just made me think of the great character with the same name in these books), even suggests that her familiarity with the text of the Crime Bible makes her one of its adherents, and that she's "looked upon the red rock, bathed in the blood that soaks it." She's acquainted with things that can be framed as deceit through her double life, lust through... the same way everybody's acquainted with lust, and murder very very tenuously through her killing of the suicide bomber in Kahndaq--although it was hardly premeditated, and inarguably defensible. Greed? I don't know if she's ever done anything that can even be construed as greed, other than dating somebody from a rich family, but on the other hand we don't know what she's been doing for money since 52 ended. Or even since 52 began.

Now, there's one thing that's still frustratingly opaque about Cainism (does the religion have a name among its adherents? is it the Order of the Stone, as Montoya suggests this issue?): what its adherents believe, and why. There's a pretty strong division between the religious concept of sin and the secular notion of crime, and the crime religion muddles the two. (There's some story I read a few weeks ago in which a religious sect believes in sinning as much as possible in order to better be able to humble themselves before God when they die; if you substitute "committing as many crimes as possible," that no longer scans.) Carlyle's lecture this issue proposes that the attraction of Cainism is somewhere between the freedom of the Nietzschean superman who makes his own morality and the de Sadean utopia in which personal gratification is the only law. But it sure seems regimented for all that it values individualism, and it doesn't offer its faithful any particular justification for their actions. (Actually, it asks them to do things on the grounds that they're not justifiable: its leaders "seek the vilest perfection.") This is the same kind of logic that, over in Justice League of America, gives us Lex Luthor, who was very recently obsessed with maintaining his public image of always being in the right, forming an "Injustice League"; it doesn't wash, because everyone justifies their own actions to themselves. We're also told that there are only three extant copies of the Crime Bible's complete text, but that the religion is trying to disseminate its text as far as possible. Jessica Hagy's index-card taxonomy of two-sin combinations makes more sense.

So a high Good for the first one--although it's worth noting that the second issue is a real step up, the kind of densely packed spy thriller/psychological grilling Rucka's got a particular gift for. But I'll get to that one when it's due.

The (Lack of) Shock of The New: Graeme finishes off 10/24

I'm still sick. Have mercy.

CASANOVA #10: The first Casanova issue that hasn't come together for me, and the problem is that it feels as if half of the story is missing - After a great set-up, the fall of Dr. Toppogrosso feels entirely unsatisfying; he's an evil man who specializes in playing mind games on unsuspecting victims, but he falls for Zephyr's pretty unsophisticated seduction remarkably easily. It's a shame, because the rest of the issue - including the set-up, but especially the subplots - crackles with the same wit and energy of the rest of the series, and I think my eyes are finally getting used to the bold blue coloring. Sadly, a low Okay. The cover is still a wonderful piece of design, though.

COUNTDOWN SPECIAL: THE FLASH: Even if you're not a Silver Age fan, this would be worth reading just for some of the crazy comic book science the Mirror Master uses at any given opportunity. It's been said before but worth saying again - we're really losing something when the comic world would rather give us dead superheroes than mind-controlling gorillas and parallel worlds used as plot devices rather than complete stories in and of themselves. Good examples of how great superhero comics can be when they're treated as kids' stories, really.

THE FLASH # 233: A massive letdown end to the current storyarc, as we get no resolution on the motives or origins of the bad guys, a fake-out conflict with the Justice League, the return (yet again!) of the "race against death" life for the speedster family, and the lack of Daniel Acuna's artwork. Yes, Freddie Williams is no slouch and the back-up story is kind of funny, but compared with the last couple of issues? I wanted more than Okay.

GOTHAM UNDERGROUND #1: Am I the only one who thinks that this book exists because the Batbooks-proper aren't crossing over with Countdown yet? Tying in with the Salvation Run storyline that's been running in the background of Countdown for awhile, and otherwise showing no other reason to be published, here's hoping that Grant Morrison has some master plan to make lemonade out've the Final Crisis lemons that are being set up for him. Eh.

SHE-HULK #22: Peter David's first issue seemingly takes Jennifer Walters in a grittier direction (complete with overwrought first-person narration), before disappearing down a detour of weird. It doesn't quite hold up, partially because there's something uninvolving about the whole thing - it feels as if David is detached throughout the book, for some reason, and that makes it hard for readers to get into it - and partially because of disappointingly lifeless art by Shawn Moll. Eh, and despite the "shock" ending, I'm not curious enough about the explanation to want to come back next issue.

X-MEN: DIE BY THE SWORD #2: My recent X-Men fetish got me to pick up this second issue of Chris Claremont unbound, and I'm not sure whether that's a good thing or not. Yes, it's filled with Claremont at his most Claremont-esque, but on the other hand, it's filled with Claremont at his most Claremont-esque; everything here's been done before, and in some cases, even with the same characters. Add in Juan Santacruz's elastically-figured dull artwork, and you have the very definition of Eh.

Tomorrow: Everyone gets into silly outfits and does the monster mash. Me, I'm hoping to be healthy enough to go back to work.

Johanna Catches Up...

Trying something new... quick takes, to break my block. The Flash #233 -- A writer as experienced as Mark Waid should know not to write stories picking at the scabs of superhero conventions. No good will come of examining the fraying fabric "realistically". As soon as the Justice League says "we've come for the kids", I laughed. The people who hung out with Mia and Wonder Girl and Robin are trying to tell a real parent how to raise his babies?

Flash points this out to them, along with a grim message of potential death for the young ones (because Sim forbid that having powers could be FUN), and they all back down. Watching the Justice League stand around like chastised schoolchildren is even worse than their hubris to start. Eh

Legion of Super-Heroes in the 31st Century #7 -- The Legion, much as I love them, have a long history of boys vs. girls stories with questionable (at best) gender politics. This falls right into that tradition with a firm splat.

Princess Xenobia (hint! hint!), heir to New Themyscira (aka Paradise Island, in less enlightened times), is missing. Some of the Legion girls go to investigate and promptly get captured by the bitch queen Circe. She turns them against themselves with a few well-placed snipes, and the girls instantly become so insecure and jealous over various boys that they're easily captured. So the boy heroes (mostly Superboy) get to go rescue them.

Who approved this Crap? We get to see the future Amazons, only to have them turn out to be harpies and the girl heroes shown as ineffective hostages? It plays into just about every gender stereotype out there ... and the boys don't show up well, either, drooling over the idea of visiting the "Planet of the Babes". I will admit, though, the idea of Bouncing Pig was funny.

Teen Titans #54 -- I think Sean McKeever is a terrific choice for this book and group, but I refuse to read this, his debut story, because it's full of too many characters and alternate future versions. I look forward to trying a less person-packed tale.

X-Men: First Class #5 -- Kid mutants go to find the Hulk. They go up against him one by one, until Marvel Girl takes care of him. Which rocks! It's only temporary, though, because we're reading the classic fight-then-team-up structure, or at least "misunderstanding becomes uneasy truce".

The difference between these kid mutants (the young, original X-Men) and all the many other kid mutant teams that Marvel's also published is a significant one... this one doesn't have the baggage. There's just the few characters, and their tentative encounters with the classic Marvel universe, instead of seventeen hundred spinoffs and variants. The feeling is purer and more innocent, not in a naive way, but in a "focused on the core of the concept" way. Jeff Parker continues to surprise with the depth of his talent. Very Good

She-Hulk #22 -- Peter David's first issue. I understand the desire to do something different from Dan Slott's run (which had become only a pale shadow of itself by halfway through). This isn't it, though, or at least anything I care about. The last page says "Next issue: More hitting!" Which I think is supposed to be funny hip, but I just found pathetic. That's not what I'm interested in reading, and there's too much of it here.

Jen's become a bounty hunter instead of a lawyer. There's more characterization given to the villain than her, though, and the cliffhangers are artificial. Sure, I want to know the explanation behind the division and the not-really-dead return, but not in any kind of involved way, just a slight curiosity towards which comic gimmick he's going to attribute it to. I'm not affected, and I'm going to forget what happened long before the next issue. Eh

Catwoman #72 -- And creators wonder why readers don't believe they're really going to do anything different... this issue reverses everything that made the recent run of Catwoman so interesting and unusual. Baby? Given away. New identity? Lost in a drunken haze. Stand-alone stories? Let's truck in Zatanna and yet another Identity Crisis reference. Life in her neighborhood? Blown up with a convenient bomb. Complicated morality? Replaced with a vengeful vow to quit being a good guy. Looks like next issue, we're back to a simple anti-hero with no family ties and nothing complicated. Borrrrrrrring.

Oh, and at her turning point, Catwoman in the Batcave stares at the costume of a dead Robin, talking about how their lives aren't safe for kids, at the same time she's ignoring the live one babysitting her daughter. Why is absolutely no one in the DCU optimistic any more? I don't want to rate this, because I get tired of marking most superhero books Eh, but that's my overall take on them. They don't aim for much, and they achieve it.

The Vinyl Underground #1 -- I liked it. I found the characters interesting, I liked their interplay, the look and design is well-suited to them, and I want to know more about what's going on. It's got a cheeky attitude towards sex that suits our culture, permeated with it, and the London setting is necessary for avoiding American puritanism. Good

The Brave and the Bold #7 -- Excellent superherodom. Wonder Woman and Power Girl interact as two women with similar powers but very different personalities (a really basic quality of good writing that many many genre writers manage to completely ignore). Mark Waid is at the peak of his very talented long game here, and George Perez's art is perfect for the detail and obsession inherent in the tales.

Wonder Woman accidentally finds out that Power Girl has been brainwashed to kill Superman. The rest of the issue is finding out how and when and by whom, made more difficult by PG's recalcitrance towards self-examination or needing anyone's help. There's also an odd little bit woven in there about being willing to destroy a repository of world-changing knowledge if it means saving a friend or a hero (I'm not sure which is more important). Great action, high-flung adventure, creative threats, and even things to think about once the story's done.

----

So, what do you think? Is shorter better? Or should I not even bother if I'm not talking about the newest titles in a more timely fashion?

Primed for disaster: Graeme talks with Authority from 10/24

So, on Thursday, my boss comes into work and she's dying of what looks to be the worst cold known to humanity. We all yell at her that she should go home, that she's going to make the rest of us sick, and she says that she'll stay in her office the whole day. Friday, she comes in again, still sick. We all yell at her again, tell her that she's going to make us all sick, and she goes to hide in her office for the whole day again.

Today, I am dying of the worst cold known to humanity.

Thanks a lot, boss. Shall we get to comics, instead?

Unlike Diana, I don't really think that THE AUTHORITY: PRIME #1 is okay, and I'm blaming almost all of it on Darick Robertson. Don't get me wrong; I think that Darick's a good artist, able to produce a variety of styles of work (His messier-than-usual issue of 52 in which Ralph died is one of the best looking of the series, and he's doing good stuff month in and out on The Boys), but there are parts of this comic that go beyond "being rushed" and into the "okay, now you're just doing taking the piss" arena. You can kind of see it in the cover, which has some sloppy background work barely saved by the colorist, but it's towards the back of the issue that it really becomes apparent - the last three pages of the book in particular, especially the last page where the splash page that should be one of the most important, money shot, pages in the issue has some appallingly sketchy figures - look unfinished and amateurishly sketchy (Check the backgrounds on the last couple of pages; look at the shadows on the second last page to see what I mean). I don't know if this was produced under a horrifically tight deadline, or whether Darick just didn't really care about the book, but it's a completely distracting black mark against a book that wasn't really that strong to begin with.

The story, you see, is a strange attempt to revive Wildstorm's last successful franchise, months after the last stalled revival. It's a good example of what's wrong with Wildstorm, on one level; Christos Gage's script is continuity-heavy, impenetrable to non-Wildstorm regulars, and reads like a parody of DC or Marvel books with much longer histories. It has no identity of its own, and not enough thrills, spills, or humor to make you want to overlook that.

Part of the problem may be that the Authority just isn't needed anymore; both of the Big Two have their own extreme superhero teams, and Marvel has pretty much driven the "superhero logic taken to extreme" and "widespread destruction" buses as far as they can go, and stripped of its status as the edgy superhero book, there's nowhere else for the Authority to go - The characters aren't strong enough or interesting enough to stand on their own outside of the original concept of the book, and putting them into a generic "two superteams fight!" plot like this underlines that. Unless you were already a fan of the characters in this issue, there's nothing of interest here at all, and when you take that and then add in the subpar art, then you've got a book that's pretty much Crap.

One Door Opens: Diana sees some Firsts and Lasts, 10/24

Well, it's been an interesting week: some new beginnings, and a somewhat unfortunate ending. Let's get right to it, shall we? I'm hard-pressed to find a more radical transformation this week than SHE-HULK #22: with Dan Slott's departure (he'd be writing Spider-Man right now if Joe Quesada's shock collar still worked), Peter David takes the book in a completely different direction. That's to be expected, of course - David and Slott have very different senses of humor, with the former leaning more towards quips and puns while the latter works better with goofy, cartoon-esque scenarios - but I didn't expect to become so interested in the story. It may just be that David has more experience in the field, but I found his first issue of SHE-HULK was enough to hold my attention, where Slott's run never really caught on with me. On the other hand, David has a tendency to wear his pop culture influences on his sleeve... X-FACTOR's Singularity Investigations was obviously drawn from Wolfram & Hart (ANGEL), and I doubt it's a coincidence that SHE-HULK #22 is structured on the same principle as the HEROES season premiere: we start the story in medias res, time has passed, and a big part of what compels us forward is learning what's happened in the interrim. Narratively speaking, this is a perfectly fair and efficient tactic, but the timing could be better. Nevertheless, this is a GOOD starting point for David's run: there's a proper balance of action, humor and mystery, though if you're looking for Slott-esque gags, you're better off searching elsewhere.

AUTHORITY: PRIME #1 is another new beginning of sorts, though I suppose anything Wildstorm's doing at the moment is soured by the total collapse of the imprint. It's interesting that this miniseries comes out more or less at the same time STORMWATCH: PHD was cancelled; for all intents and purposes, this can be read both as a continuation of Gage's run and as a sequel to Ed Brubaker's AUTHORITY: REVOLUTION (since the Morrison/Ha run has been completely derailed). When it comes to action sequences, Gage rarely disappoints; in this issue alone Stormwatch goes old-school (it says something that I don't find Battalion's look nearly as ridiculous under Darick Robertson's pen as it probably did ten years ago) and beats up some giant robots while the Authority fends off a Lovecraftian hentai monster. Characterization is a bit on the light side, with a distinct focus on Stormwatch Prime (though there's a case to be made that the Authority has always been comprised of flat, one-note characters anyway). However, there's a definite sense of "road well-traveled" here - I feel like I've read this story before, Stormwatch and the Authority going to war over secrets from the past (though I can't remember whether Wildstorm has actually published a similar storyline). OKAY for what it is, because I know Gage isn't setting out to reinvent the wheel here... all the same, I can't see this being more than a pleasant distraction in the long run.

And speaking of long runs, it would've been nice to say that Gail Simone's tenure on GEN13 comes to a close after a long and successful reign on the title, but... well... no. Don't get me wrong, I liked the first six issues - Simone's characterization of the teens, especially Eddie, was instantly endearing - but somewhere along the way GEN13 seriously lost focus. This "Road Trip" arc had a grand total of four superteen teams running around fighting each other, all through an unofficial crossover with Simone's other soon-to-be-canned Wildstorm title, WELCOME TO TRANQUILITY. It didn't accomplish much other than allowing the kids to whine about their fate some more, and this latest issue - Simone's last - was particularly frustrating because the potential is right there on the page, and she doesn't take advantage of it. Disappointingly EH, especially as a finale to her ongoing storyline. Better luck on WONDER WOMAN, I guess.

My Life is Choked with Comics #12 - Judex

Let me start this one off with a question.

Why does Batman laugh so much in All Star Batman and Robin, the Boy Wonder?

There's a number of possible, more-or-less mutually inexclusive answers.

First, maybe writer Frank Miller is completely fucking nuts, and simply has no control over what his fingers are doing anymore, which, naturally, is why he's been entrusted with creative roles on expensive movie projects. Or maybe he's trying to tell jokes. I'd say about half of them make me smile.

Alternatively, perhaps Batman's cackle is an authorial one, just barely masking Miller's sneer toward a readership he holds in low regard, even as he scoops up their cash. Just recently, in an interview with The Comics Journal (#285, Oct. 2007), Darwyn Cooke deemed Miller's The Dark Knight Strikes Again "a hateful piece of junk." Those wouldn't be Cooke's first words on the issue, but this time it's the "hateful" that catches my eye, as it suggests active bad faith on Miller's part.

But there may be less wicked motives at play. For example, Miller may be drawing a parallel between his young Batman and a certain grinning arch-foe, set to appear in the series' next issue. The connections between the two have long been part of Bat-lore; who can forget the ending of Alan Moore's and Brian Bolland's Batman: The Killing Joke? Perhaps Moore would like to forget it, but the image remains suggestive of still-applicable character undercurrents, for better or worse. Madness! Extra-legality! Joy!

Hey, maybe Batman's just happy because he loves being Batman; he tells us as much via caption, after all. Going a bit deeper, Batman's joy is indicative of his freedom. That's probably the core theme running through at least the last twenty years of Miller's work - freedom. All of the costumed characters in All Star Batman are joyful when they can do as they please, outside of society's regulation, facing off against bad people and bad authority. Miller frowns at characters like his Superman and Green Lantern, who have the power of gods, but constrain themselves for whatever reason.

Taking All Star Batman as Batman: The Dark Knight Begins, you can see Miller's young Superman (who can't even tell he can fly, so low is his ambition) on the road to becoming the federal tool of Batman: The Dark Knight Returns, a journey that will only end happily as he embraces his true godly nature at the conclusion of DK2. Super-freedom! Miller stops the story before Superman and Batman inevitably come into conflict again, saving him the trouble of escaping the thematic corner he's painted himself into, but it's easy to guess that his heart will remain with Batman - he's a human who's found such glory within his person that he stands with gods. And it's all the funnier when the action is set in the old days, when superhero characters (and comics, stepping outside the fiction), didn't quite know what the hell they were up to yet.

Hmmm, 'old' things.

You know, it could be that Batman is laughing because that's what The Shadow did. Miller must be aware of the influence the famous radio and pulp character (first published in 1931, though a nebulous radio presence extended back a year) had on the 1939 creation of the gun-toting Bat-Man, so maybe he's just paying a little homage with his early days story.

So then, why's The Shadow laughing?

He's got a good, strong laugh. Chills the marrow of the bones, I hear. His cackle is routinely followed by the crack of twin automatics, linking joy to deadly violence. He's almost an aesthete in that way.

Really, why wouldn't he laugh? He's something pretty close to God on those Depression streets, commanding the unquestioning loyalty of a whole folk brigade, high and low class brought into the ranks. All are equal in the eyes of the false Lamont Cranston, the former Kent Allard.

He's so domineering a character -- yet aloof from human concern! -- that he proves tricky to write. As Dennis O'Neil wrote in his introduction to The Private Files of The Shadow, a 1989 collection of comics he produced with artist Michael Wm. Kaluta circa 1973-74: "Unthinking obedience to a man is fascism; unthinking obedience to a deity is merely good sense." To circumvent the potentially fascist aspect of the character, O'Neil set all of his stories on urban Depression streets, to remove the concept to a realm sliding into folklore, and declined to shade the title character's personality, so as to emphasize his godly correctness in isolating sectors of evil to smash.

Other comics writers grappled with similar concerns, in different ways - Howard Chaykin gleefully embraced the untoward political aspects of the concept in his 1986 modern revival, having the character bark repressive sentiments while leaping into battle as a queasy-yet-dazzling aspect of past people's fantasy, unique for his social cruelty. Writer Andy Helfer's 1987-89 ongoing follow-up gradually pressed the manic aspects of the concept into outright parody, mixing in absurd elements of peer genres (can you say "robot body?") to offset the bloody anxiety that the character embodies.

Indeed, O'Neil (back in that book intro) felt that Shadow creator Walter B. Gibson, while plainly influenced by the likes of Poe and Doyle -- not to mention Jimmie Dale, The Grey Seal, a 1917 masked rogue playboy crimefighter creation of Frank L. Packard -- was nevertheless unique in creating "instant folklore" by crafting a personification of urban anxiety as a force for good instead of ill. O'Neil further quotes one Chris Steinbrunner as observing:

"Menacing figures dressed in black had long been popular characters in mystery stories, films and plays... Gibson took this terrible, dread shape that had hitherto been the hero's nemesis and made it the hero. The Shadow was both the force for good and lurker in the darkness."

I agree with this summary of the character's undercurrent. But he was not the first.

I don't feel sturdy enough to tell you who the 'first' actually was, but I can tell you that there was another Mysterious Shadow, years before, a chaotic type of 'good' shaped by his own time and place. And one who didn't hail from radio or prose or comics, but the young art of cinema. His adventures were followed in the serial form. He had roots in the same place as the pulp heroes, yet his accoutrements were often those of the later 'superhero,' at least the dark, brooding, human-avenger-of-the-night variant.

He was called Judex, which we are told means "Justice." He debuted in a French movie serial named for him, which spanned thirteen episodes (an extra-length Prologue and twelve regular episodes) from 1916 to 1917. Just look at him. That black hat and cloak will never go out of style. Could use a little crimson, though.

But to best understand the concept of Judex, we must look to the career path of his co-creator, a French cinema giant by the name of Louis Feuillade.

Feuillade (1873-1925) was a bright light in French film as the silent era matured, and cooled toward its dusk; he'd hoped to be a famous poet in his youth, but he found himself at the film studio Gaumont in 1905, working as a scriptwriter. Feuillade rose through the company, quickly becoming artistic director of the studio and a hugely prolific filmmaker. He positioned himself as a sort of philosophical rival to the slightly younger-but-stronger studio Pathé, putting out series of light comedies and slice-of-life realist pictures to counter the sometimes loftier output of his rival. Feuillade's approach was determinedly populist:

"I consider cinema as a place for rest, cheerfulness, soft emotions, dreams, forgetfulness. Others want to turn it into the temple of the abstract, the bizarre, the hallucinatory and the deformed; this is their business... We don't always go to the movies to study. The public flocks to it to be entertained. I place the public above everything else. Since it is their own aim to be entertained, my only object should be to fulfill their desire. The public is my master."

That quote comes from Fabrice Zagury's insert essay to the 2000 Image Entertainment dvd release of Feuillade's famous 1915-16 serial Les Vampires. That and Judex, released to R1 dvd in 2004 by Flicker Alley, are his only works domestically available to North American viewers. This makes some sense, as Feuillade ultimately became most popular in his own time for his fantastic serial films.

Most commentators specify Feuillade's most lasting serial triumph as his 1913-14 screen outing for Marcel Allain's and Pierre Souvestre's ultra-popular arch-fiend Fantômas, star of prose fiction since 1911 (his influence continues to radiate - surely readers of this site recall the New X-Men character Fantomex). The project, totaling twenty-one chapters over five films, can currently be found on R2 PAL dvd from Artificial Eye.

It was a major success, and Feuillade soon moved to create his own weird villain epic, the aforementioned ten-chapter Les Vampires. Chronicling the Parisian criminal activities of the titular crime society, with special attention paid to iconic, black body stocking-clad villainess Irma Vep, the series caused a sensation, and was initially banned by police in the city of its setting as a glamorization of crime.

You can perhaps see why. Les Vampires is one of those good vs. evil tales in which the delight of evil is emphasized to the point where good's eventual triumph is rendered at best hollow, and at worst hypocritical. It is demanded we first luxuriate in the antics of Irma Vep and company, so long as we wash our hands later and applaud the superiority of virtue, which is so inherent that it apparently needs not be pressed much on the screen.

The film was also released in the midst of the Great War, and its on-location visions of empty city streets, plus its themes of a polite society terrorized, likely spoke to the anxieties of the public, Feuillade's master. He was never a darling of the filmic avant-garde of the time - beyond simple sniffing at unpopular aesthetic inclinations, he approached filmmaking from a novelistic viewpoint, and, while interested in the poetry of the image, he didn't supplicate narrative before the formal potentials of the cinema (I know debates over an artform's storytelling potential never happen today, but bear with me). Still, his deadpan intrusions of the nervous uncanny into poetic visions of anxious-yet-real locations inspired the likes of arch-Surrealist André Breton, and the redoubtable Luis Buñuel.

But wait... all this 'embodiment of anxiety' sounds a bit like O'Neil's conceptualization of The Shadow. You might as well extend that to Batman, Miller's or Moore's or otherwise. Only, these characters are presented to us as moody protectors from the really nasty aspects of contemporary life.

Judex, serial and character, is a bridge. In several ways. He joins the detective and costumed adventurer heroes of the literature and drama -- Sherlock Holmes, The Scarlet Pimpernel, etc. -- to the pulp characters and superheroes of the slightly later 20th century. At the same time, he joins the then-popular master criminal character type -- Fantômas and Fu Manchu debuted at roughly the same time in France and England, respectively -- to the 'dark' hero archetype often showcased in later comics and stories. And beyond even that, he represents a turning point in Feuillade's popular filmmaking.

Feuillade and writer Arthur Bernède very likely created Judex as a means of preserving some of the nasty, popular flavor from the director's earlier costumed epics, while also promoting wholesome values. Good notions that wouldn't get the authorities and cultural commentators angry with them. Judex was a new black-clad character, one who'd move outside the laws of society and command great fear, but who'd only bedevil the bad sorts. Anarchy that wouldn't piss the police off. A Fantômas you could take home to grandma. And even better - over the course of his adventure he'd learn compassion, fall in love with a sweet girl, and insert himself smoothly into clean bourgeoisie living.

Put simply, with Judex, the superhero is not a dream of protection in which the madness of modern living springs out with might and fury to save us from our fellow humans. Rather, the superhero is anarchy's domestication, a fantasy of the madness itself calming into the status quo and realizing virtue. Despite being another wartime release, his film does not so much as admit a war is happening; it can be presumed the Great War has not yet begun for Judex, and thus he can sink cozily into a proper, popular notion of the status quo. Unlike The Shadow, or Miller's Batman, he does not laugh. He does not need to.

That makes Judex-the-serial a very odd watch for today's superhero enthusiast. I mean, beyond just being a silent movie, which is an acquired taste to begin with. Then again, maybe the fantastic aspect of Feuillade's grounded art helps things out for today's viewer; Walter Kerr theorized in his excellent 1975 book The Silent Clowns that silent comedy can be enjoyed 'as is' by modern viewers because the limitations on realism mandated by the technology of the time do not distract from foolery as they do drama, so natural is the former in an unreal place. I think that may extend to the mad stories of Feuillade. Be warned, though - nothing this cool happens, or could even be expected. This adventure's all about being nice, which really sets the character against his spiritual descendants.

So many similarities, though! Judex is the alter ego of one Jacques de Tremeuse, a lad born into riches. Sadly, his father takes on the poor financial advice of sly capitalist Favraux, and winds up killing himself in shame over losing the clan's cash... just seconds before the family finds out that a gold mine will insure their prosperity for eons to come! Jacques' angry mother makes him and his brother Roger swear on their father's corpse to exact awful vengeance on Favraux, which naturally inspires Jacques to grow up to be the kind of guy who dresses in a fancy black costume, hides out in a gadget-stocked subterranean cave, sets up a network of helpers in the surrounding area, trains a large pack of dogs and a small flock of birds to be his helpers, and masters the art of disguise. Roger's there too, as his non-costumed sidekick.

But Judex isn't even in the Prologue. Sort of. Viewers used to American sound serials might be thrown by the pace Feuillade maintains, more akin to the serial novels of Dumas than a cliffhanger-every-episode matinee thrill ride. For his beginning, Feuillade sketches in the twisted relationships of a large cast, all of them brought together at Favraux's country estate.

His daughter, Jacqueline, is planning to remarry after her husband's death, although she's been hooked up with a slimy, in-debt aristocrat that only wants her money. Also a fan of money is the diabolical Diana Monti (played by Irma Vep herself, the great "Musidora"), a crime queen who's posing as nursemaid for Jacqueline's foppy lil' son while actually serving as Favraux's mistress, in hopes of slipping into his will. She's backed by criminal lifer Moralés, who's actually the lost son of another man Favraux ruined, Kerjean, an elderly ruin who's fresh out of jail and after an apology. He unknowingly prompts Judex, who's disguised as yet another member of the cast (a fact not revealed for several episodes), to make his move, threatening via letter to kill Favraux if he doesn't give half his fortune to the poor. This necessitates the presence of a bumbling novice detective, Cocantin, who completely fails to protect Favraux, who *gasp* *choke* falls dead just as Judex predicted! How weird and uncanny!

It's a very decently structured start, followed up by some quick action. The sheltered Jacqueline learns of her late father's ill deeds, tosses her slickster fiancée out, and gives the whole blood money fortune away to charity, winning the eternal loathing of Diana Monti. Meanwhile, Favraux isn't actually dead - Judex and company spirit his stunned ass away to a holding cell deep in Our Hero's Chateau-Rouge headquarters, where he's left to await execution. Judex keeps tabs on him with an "electric mirror" and a typewriter that makes words of fire appear on the wall in Favraux's room (this is the stuff the Surrealists ate up, btw). But even as the villain slowly goes nuts, Judex's chill heart begins to melt over good Jacqueline, who's taken on work to support her son, and is vulnerable to the plots of Diana Monti, who's very nearly on to the whole scheme.

Much of the rest of the serial sees Judex 'n pals saving Jacqueline from peril, all while the hero frets over whether to reveal himself to the woman who considers him her father's killer. High melodrama indeed, interspersed with slapstick comedy from Cocantin, or a street urchin called the Licorice Kid (I tend to laugh at any joke involving small children smoking cigarettes, and there's several here). The cast shifts and swirls from role to role, crooks going straight only to turn back to crime, and various Judex allies shifting from location to location. Complications pile up, and several outrageous coincidences occur.

It's very much a 'values' film. Judex is connected with earlier madmen and villains, locking a guy up in a cave and leaving him there to flip out, but he gradually becomes kinder. Locations are heavily bucolic, setting the work apart from the urban simmer of earlier serials, and implicitly celebrating a simpler way of life. Feuillade's camera never moves; his eye for beautiful and quietly menacing natural settings is very fine, as is his sense of composition, although he's fascinatingly prone to let little errors -- a man dropping his pipe, a dog leaping into a car while a character enters -- remain present in the finished work. His is a poised, but not controlled realism.

The overriding sex of Irma Vep is absent - here, it's mostly the pure Jacqueline, all cream and light (not actually a virgin, given the kid, but close enough), set against the sexually open and therefore evil Diana Monti. A late-in-the-game addition of a plucky adventuress character (who even gets decked out in Judex's cloak for a rescue scene) does relieve the work of its virgin-whore complex, although Feuillade takes every opportunity he can to play up the character's t&a, leaving the male gaze intact. Huh. Almost like a real superhero comic, then!

And yet, all this celebration of the bourgeoisie does give Judex a certain something that's lacking from the pulp and comic works that would follow in its save-the-day footsteps. First, there's real attention paid to the aristocratic aspects of the rich superhero setup. As Judex's faith in his mission of revenge fades, the very first thing he does is travel to the family estate, in full costume no less, and ask Mother permission to call off the vengeance. Imagine Batman having to run his missions by Martha Wayne before leaving stately Wayne Manor. But for Judex, familial bonds and tradition are of the utmost importance.

Moreover, in chronicling his uncanny character's path from cruelty to humaneness, Feuillade paints this early superhero with super-compassion, and characterizes his 'super' nature as being a catalyst for forgiveness and reunion. After the kidnapping of Favraux, he never attacks thugs or the like, only using lethal force for self-defense. In a wonderful scene near the finale, Diana Monti sticks a gun in his face, but he calmly brushes it aside, saying "I'm here to negotiate." Diplomacy has never seemed so mighty!

Obviously I'm 'reading' this work from the perspective of 21st century superhero comics, and maybe I've just read way too many of those, but there's something genuinely touching about the work's faith in people as good at heart, and inclined toward peace and forgiveness. Could it be the ultimate wartime fantasy? The greatest weird aspect of a work forced to live in a world more suited to Les Vampires? Every death in this work is anti-heroic, and deeply sad. Feuillade lingers on the pleading eyes of a man shot down after a car chase. When Diana Monti meets her end, her body coughed up ashore from the sea she plunged into, a man crouches sadly over her. You wonder how her life went that she got there. Musidora's eyes always seem tired in this work, as if her character has been through an awful lot.

Europe went through an awful lot more. Even though Judex finds some happiness and stops wearing that fucking costume -- the final step in chaos' movement toward order -- there was nevertheless a 1917-18 sequel serial from Feuillade & Bernède titled The New Mission of Judex. I haven't seen it. I don't know where I could see it. Maybe he fights the Penguin? The original story was remade twice, once in the 1934 feature Judex 34, written by Bernède himself and directed by Feuillade's son-in-law, Maurice Champreux, and then in 1963 under the plain Judex title, from Cinematheque Française co-founder and Eyes Without a Face director Georges Franju, who supposedly plays up the WWI connection and the period gender roles in his homage. The character has also appeared in Jean-Marc & Randy Lofficier-edited Tales of the Shadowmen anthology, a sort of Wold Newton Universe thing for France.

But his primary adventures never continued after the war.

It's one of those odd little extra-fiction coincidences that the timeline of Judex seems to end precisely where that of the pulp Shadow begins, and in exactly the same place. One could easily imagine Jacques de Tremeuse skulking his romantic head around the shadow-black wartime France, and running into a certain French-allied agent by the name of Kent Allard. The enormity of the world-stopping focusing event that was the Great War facilitates such possibilities, out in the fields of black and red disaster.

Perhaps there -- metafictionally speaking, and with hindsight -- we can imagine that a ticklish desire for chaos to cool, and grasp virtue, was transformed into a yowl for justice to incarnate from the smoke. Fashion tips were exchanged, and the cloak was passed. Ironically, it went from a good devil, who'd hardly lift a finger in violence unless direly pressed, to a cruel cherubim, his song the work of blazing twin automatics. He'd shoot them all down, and laugh.

It's all you can do, sometimes.

Another head hangs lowly: Graeme goes XXX from 10/24.

The quickest review of CRAWL SPACE: XXXOMBIES #1 that you need: Remember "Planet Terror" from Grindhouse? Imagine that starring the cast of Boogie Nights, and that's just what this comic is like.

The slightly less quick review: Surprisingly, it doesn’t suck. I’m not sure if that sounds like damning with faint praise or not, but man, I’m really sick of zombie books at this point (Marvel Zombies 2 review aside. And even there, I was really surprised by the fact that that didn’t suck, either. Maybe I was just reading bad zombie books?), and despite the creative team attached to this book, I was pretty much assuming that this would be a pretty average 22-or-so pages with little to recommend it to others. How little I knew; Rick Remender’s writing hits just the right tone of winking to the audience with every set-up throughout the entire book. There’s no originality here, but that’s pretty much the point – The characters are meant to be generic, stock types, stereotypical sketches so that you can already begin to expect their inevitable, poetic-justice-laden demise (Not that I expect the series to stick to tried-and-true formula all the way through to the end. If our nervous, premature ejaculator gets to the last page and wins the girl of his dreams, I have to admit that I’ll be disappointed). What there is, however, is a particularly tongue-in-cheek humor to the whole thing, an acknowledgement that it’s schlock but that doesn’t mean that it can’t be entertaining schlock.

Meanwhile, Kieron Dwyer’s artwork makes the whole thing sing. It’s easily one of the best things about the book, just beautiful work that skates close to caricature without being overwhelmed by it, clear and easy on the eye as it effortlessly tells the story. It's the kind of artwork that you look at and wonder why Dwyer isn't a star whose fanbase can keep any project aloft indefinitely, before you remember that artstars are people like Michael Turner these days and get depressed.

(Of course, working on books like this instead of the next big Marvel crossover limits his audience as well, but you can’t help but see his enthusiasm for this project on every page. He’s happier doing this kind of thing that drawing Thor pout at Iron Man, you kind of end up thinking.)

As with Grindhouse, this isn’t for everyone, or even trying to win over anyone new into the genre. Instead, it’s an enthusiastic and unapologetic celebration of the genre, right down to zombies that really do say "...Brains..." when they’re hungry. The idea of yet another shuffling undead book might not make you want to take out your wallet, but the idea of talented creators having fun doing Good work they love might...

Abhay Likes Sean Phillips's Covers for Vinyl Underground, But...

This is a negative review of Vinyl Underground #1, a new "ongoing" series from DC Vertigo: Why does DC-Vertigo think that I give a flying fuck about London? Does London have New York City in it somewhere? No? Then, I don't really care about London. Right this second, you have a plane ticket to anywhere: would you really go to London? It's not even near my Top 5, and I have family there. Madrid. Rome. Lisbon. Reykjavik. Svenborgia. Athens. Amsterdam-- does London have hash bars? No? See you in Amsterdam, boring Vertigo comic. And that's just Western Europe!

Vinyl Underground #1 pretends to be about London so-- just on some fundamental level, I'm not really sympathetic with the series' stated goals.

Add in that it's not really about London much at all, at least in the first issue-- like most comics, it's just sort of about bullshit. The premise of this comic: there's a bunch of crappy characters; they have to solve some crappy mystery; that's it. Ho hum: it's not really about anything.

The only thing you really learn about London is that apparently some people there do a legal drug called “Khat.” That's really the only information that's conveyed. No one really talks about the city or its history. You don't find out good places to hang out. You don't really find out about interesting neighborhoods or trends or bars. Or why London's important, or why it matters, or why you should care about it.

Also: a comic about London and you can’t squeeze a single Pakistani or Indian person in there anywhere? Really? It’s a Vertigo comic—if there’s one thing I know about Vertigo, I know for a 100% certainty that the colorist didn’t run out of brown.

Craftwise, let me ask you a question: how excited can you get by a comic that looks like this? Which isn't to say it's ugly: I like Simon Gane's pencils; I like Cameron Stewart's inks; I like Guy Major's colors. Man, those are three talented dudes. But presentation-wise, this basically looks like a Batman comic. So look: why shouldn't I just read Batman instead? How important do you think it is for a non-mainstream comic to distinguish itself visually from a mainstream comic? It's nice, but there's nothing that signals this as special or unique. It's nice but it's not... more. It's just business as usual. If you're Joe Comic Reader, why get this when you can get something that looks like this, and reads like this, but has some cool character in it you already know and like? Game, Set and Match: the Batman.

Characterwise, the book unfortunately reminds me of American Virgin, a hideously written Vertigo comic with some very nice art that was canceled just recently. In the few issues I read (I gave up after #3 or #4 after sticking around out of morbid curiosity), the lead character was wildly fucking abrasive; he just seemed fake. I couldn’t imagine people would want to come back and read about such a thoroughly phony and unpleasant main character month after month.

This comic...

One character's a convicted sex offender because he set up a "bogus kiddie porn" website to entrap pedophiles-- but he went to jail because he'd "spent all the punters' money." At the risk of looking stupid on a comic book review blog: why does that mean he's a sex offender? If the website were bogus, wouldn't that have meant that at most he committed fraud? I’m not sure but: DC either publishes the heroic adventure of a character who went to jail for trafficking in child pornography, or they publish a comic about a guy who didn't traffic in kiddie-porn but was a registered sex offender anyway because...? Either way…

Another character's a "nymphomaniac virgin" who is "the only on-line porn star who never goes all the way." Which, uhm, is wrong: there are any number of online porn stars who don't go all the way. There's softcore or semi-softcore websites where the appeal of the girls to their audience is plainly that they haven't been in hardcore scenes. It's porn-- there's no "only" anything; no matter what you want, there's a half-dozen websites for it. Why doesn't the writer know that? Is that supposed to be funny? It's just wrong. It's factually inconsistent with how I understand the world to work. It’s meaningless.

Blah blah blah, there’s the leader (he’s had sex!), the useless girl (he’s a psychic, but he has seizures), the hothead (she’s black so that means she’s sassy!), and the muscle (the virgin girl who does porn also enjoys violence!). So, the useless girl in this comic is a boy, while the muscle in this comic is a girl. Pretty daring stuff.

None of them say anything funny or interesting or intelligent. A dull "sex scene" aside, none of them seem to like each other very much, or really be friends in any noticeable way. What's supposed to bring people back for #2? What makes them worth your time or attention? Who is this comic for?

Then there's a scene where the young white girl tries to buy drugs and is almost raped at knifepoint by two black drug dealers and a token white character thrown in to ... to, what, somehow make the scene somehow palatable to liberal sensitivities? It doesn’t really work that way. Isn’t the plain implication of a token white character in a gang of black rapists the following: "hang out with the Africans and adopt their fashions, white-boy, and you too will become subhuman"? Uhhhm: hrm.

There's a moment in this comic where there's a news headline that says "Going Straight After 18 Months" at the bottom of the page. Besides that a caption that says "hang on a second though.. let's rewind for the true and secret story..." The next page starts: "Morrison Shepherd, broken down and broken-hearted drug-and-drink-free for twenty-eight months and counting." My question is this: does rewind mean something different in London than it does over here? Like the way "fags" over here means "cigarettes" over there, or "homosexuals" over here means "coffee cakes" over there. What does "rewind" mean?

Oh yeah: there's some bullshit about psychic powers and the occult. I don't know why the real world is so fucking studiously avoided by comic book writers, as I tend to think it's a rather lovely place to live-- but for those of you looking for a comic about psychic powers and magical pixie dust sprinkled on ha-has and unicorns scissor-fucking rainbows and whatever else fake bullshit, here's one more for you, I guess.

What’s especially difficult is to understand how this got picked up as an ongoing series, given that Vertigo’s last dalliance with a comic about London did so badly. Did they ever collect Peter Milligan and Philip Bond’s Pop:London? I believe sales were so low that they never bothered, which is a shame as it was one of Peter Milligan’s better comics—I was and am very fond of it. That was only a few years ago and it failed spectacularly.

Did they think that sales would somehow be better with a guy who doesn't draw as well as Phillip Bond, and a guy who doesn’t write as well as Peter Milligan so long as they kept the setting in London, a place the majority of the readership (uh: who live in the United States) doesn't care the least bit about?

What were they even thinking?

I don't know if I'd describe myself as an Anglophile, but I know my Charlie Brooker from my Tommy Saxondale; I know where BBC-America’s on my dial; I think Britain's Hardest is cracking good television; and I still could give a fuck that a comic’s set in London. Is there a sizable hardcore Anglophile audience that sprang up after the failure of Pop London that I’m unaware of?

There’s a time and a place for this comic; it’s called 2000AD. We ignore that comic over here.

It's Not Easy Being... Aw, you know the rest: Graeme gets hard on the Corps from 10/24.

After being one of the summer's more interesting crossovers, GREEN LANTERN CORPS #17 continues the "Sinestro Corps" storyline's slow slide into chaos. Unlike the last issue of Green Lantern, where things happened in such a way as to be far less dramatic than you'd have hoped for, this issue sees very little happen at all. Sure, there's an attempt to have everything feel filled with urgency and drama, but it's all fairly obviously playing for time, and little plot advancement occurring (In fact, beyond the new Ion being revealed, I don't think any plot advancement happens at all). Part of this may be due to the delay in Green Lantern #25 that's just been announced, but I'm wondering how much of this is also down to the storyline being extended past original plans just because it's one of the few things that's popular over at DC these days.

Certainly, what happens in the issue isn't what was solicited, with only one of those promised plot beats happening in the issue itself, instead building up to a big showdown next issue, which was originally solicited as the epilogue to the entire event (and also the debut of new writer Peter Tomasi; I really hope that this subpar issue wasn't Dave Gibbons' last, because it's a sad was to go out, especially missing the final chapter of the storyline). To add to the feeling of last-minute filler, this issue has three guest artists in addition to regular artist Patrick Gleason, who only seems to contribute the cover and the last page of the story... A page that, if you're like me, have already had spoiled for you by the TALES OF THE SINESTRO CORPS: SUPERMAN-PRIME oneshot (which is Okay, but won't do Geoff Johns' reputation for hyperviolence any good; Pete Woods' art is great, though, and I have no idea why he's not on any regular book these days) which you read first, thinking that it wouldn't involve any major plotlines.

Obviously, reading a book which not only feels like playing for time, but also a letdown from previous issues, is going to come across badly. Nonetheless, this is still Okay, mostly because of the momentum that the storyline's already built up. With the next chapter a month away, and the final chapter delayed, here's hoping that everything can be pulled together in such a way as to deliver the payoff that makes it all worthwhile.

I Liked the Hand in the Lower Right Corner of the Cover: Jog with a 10/24 quick one

Sometimes I read a comic, and I just feel like writing about it immediately. And what's the internet good for if not instant gratification?

Foolkiller #1 (of 5): Well, this is a piece of work. While nominally a MAX revival of the Steve Gerber vigilante genre critique, it mostly reads like something that dropped out of an alternate dimension where EC's crime and horror comics thrived and mutated into market-ruling decadence. It's got a desperate crook narrator, a nasty sense of humor, and plenty of grotesque yet distinctly cheesy ironic fates in store for immoral souls. It's dizzyingly lurid.

Nate McBride is a former NFL defensive lineman turned collections heavy for a diabolical online poker operation. He thought he could rip 'em off, but he wound up with his hand fed to a garbage disposal, his wife raped and murdered, and his younger daughter's head twisted 180 degrees. His bedridden older daughter's next, unless he comes up with a cool twenty grand... and the girl will die anyway if she doesn't get a heart transplant in time!! What Nate needs now is the kind of man who'll confront college rapists with a line like "You don't bring a dick to a knife fight" before mutilating all of their genitals.

Writer Gregg Hurwitz is an admirer of Garth Ennis' work on The Punisher, which actually bodes well for genre critique (with Ennis, the critique is the genre), but for now he mainly approaches things as if all Ennis' book needs is even less restraint. Prepare for comparatively stiff dialogue, plus some clumsy location transitions and word-picture awkwardness typical of new-to-comics writers.

On the plus side, artist Lan Medina and colorist Andy Troy adopt an extra-rich visual style prone to pulp cover aplomb - that panel with the goons approaching Nate's family is going to trash comics heaven when it dies. Fans of crime funnies mayhem will probably find it all dimly OKAY, but it could go south real quick.

What If Graeme Managed To Read Some Comics From 10/24?

Maybe it was just me, but the old "What If...?" series always seemed better in theory than reality. I mean, sure, the idea of alternative worlds where major Marvel events have gone in the other direction seems like a great idea, but - as anyone who's bought those What If Classic reprints has no doubt realized by now - it quickly ended up as "What If That That Second Last Panel Of Daredevil #38 Had Happened Differently?" with every story either ending in essentially the same way as the original - as if to prove the existence of some kind of cosmic Marvel fate - or with everyone dying. You never quite got exactly what you wanted, with the exception of that Kirby issue where Stan Lee became Mr. Fantastic.

Luckily, only half of WHAT IF: PLANET HULK sucks.

Actually, that's not entirely true; of the two main stories in the book (There's a third story, a one-pager illustrated by Fred Hembeck of all people that's pretty throwaway, but a nice throwback to the comedy moments of the original nonetheless; Greg Pak writes all three stories), the first may be a disappointment in terms of outcome - It's essentially "What if World War Hulk happened with the Hulk's wife instead of the Hulk, and much faster?" - but it's not really sucky as much as rushed and unsatisfying considering its premise. The second story, however, offers an alternative both in terms of concept, but also execution; much quieter, more optimistic and more of a character piece, it is - despite a last page reveal that I'm not sure I understand properly (Have the Hulk and Banner merged? Or the Hulk become really skinny?) - more successful than the first tale, but much more importantly, a counterbalance to the first half of the book that manages to make the entire issue feel more worthwhile and entertaining; some would say Good. Sure, there's no Flo Steinberg becoming the Invisible Woman, but what can you do?

The focused totality of my psychic powers: Graeme finishes off 10/17.

If it's Tuesday*, it's the last minute round-up of other things that I've read this past week. Not everything that I've read, of course, because I don't think anyone wants to know the fruit of my "I must read lots of Claremont X-Men from when I was a kid" labors but, you know. Thank heaven for small mercies, and all that. Still - Hey kids! Comics!

COUNTDOWN #28: And now, almost halfway into the entire series, comes the first "I didn't see that coming" moment of the entire thing (A fact not helped by the fact that so much of the series to this date was revealed in advertisements, solicitations or interviews ahead of time). It wasn't even something I didn't see coming at all, just something that I didn't see coming for awhile; Monarch capturing the "challengers of the beyond" or whatever they're called (and Grant Morrison should complain about his name being stolen, bastardized, and used for such an uninspiring group of characters, really). For a second, I got optimistic about the rest of the series, thinking "Maybe now, things will start to happen and it'll start to be interesting," but then I thought about everything else that happened in the issue, and realized that this was probably just fluke. For now, in that case, this remains pretty much Eh.

CAPTAIN AMERICA #31: Ed Brubaker steps into Chris Claremont's favorite world of mind control - I'd forgotten how much he loved Malice from the Marauders, you know - and produces something much more disturbing than women turning evil and telling everyone around them how freeing it feels (For me, it was Sharon being the nurse; there's something about that that really unsettled me, for some reason). There's a lot to be said for the way that Brubaker's turned this book into an ensemble piece since the death of Steve Rogers, and the cliffhanger of this issue makes me wonder whether the "new" Captain America that we're being promised is going to be a new good guy protagonist, or a mind-controlled Bucky that the rest of the cast are going to have to deal with. Very Good, still.

JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA #14: Is Dwayne McDuffie really apologizing for Ed Benes' art a couple of times, or am I reading into it? First, you get Lex Luthor's "It's unconscionable, isn't it?" following the double-page spread of Wonder Woman, Black Canary and Vixen tied up and displaying tits and ass, and then, following a panel where Black Lightning zaps two women, causing them to arch their backs and, again, display t'n'a to the audience, he says "It looks a lot worse than it actually is." If that's just a coincidence, it's a weird and amusing one. Outside of that, this was a slow third chapter to a story that hadn't really built up that much momentum to begin with, with a central idea that we've seen too many times before. It's still better than Brad Meltzer, but somehow I expected more than just Okay.

MARVEL ZOMBIES 2 #1: Dammit. I wanted to dislike this book on principle. It shouldn't work, after all; there's no real plot to think about, and everything runs on dark humor and a sense of comedic foreboding instead of any kind of plot logic, but somehow, it's still enjoyable even though the joke stopped being funny a long time ago... I don't understand why, but surprisingly Good.

X-MEN: EMPEROR VULCAN #2: Hey, it's the old "the enemy of my enemy is my friend" plot! Good to see the X-Men books reuse this old and somewhat tired trope, and arguably better to see that it still works, to an extent; this may be a firmly B-list spin-off book, but it's nonetheless solidly Good. Maybe Annihilation: Conquest and Green Lantern have put me in the mood to read more space opera, or maybe my Claremont-immersion is starting to skew the quality control of my mind...

But what did the rest of you think?

(* - I had originally written Monday. Even though I know it's Tuesday. Apparently a lack of sleep and posting first thing in the morning doesn't help me with my calendaring.)

Picture Book: Graeme considers timeliness, avenging from 10/17

Is it completely shitty and cheap to make some kind of "MIGHTY AVENGERS #5? I didn't know they still published that book!" joke? I mean, okay, it's been three months since the release of the last issue - which was itself a month late - but does that excuse making such a lazy joke about a late book?

Of course, things would be different if there was anything about the book that excused such a delay, such as it being, you know, good. I think that's the oddest thing about the delays in publishing for this particular title, because you can't really see where the hold-up is. Frank Cho's art is nice enough - his dismissive Hank Pym is particularly enjoyable - but it's not the excessively detailed kind of work that you look at and think, "Well, I can see how much time that must've taken." A lot of the panels lack backgrounds - or, at least, backgrounds from linework; colorist Jason Keith should be congratulated for his contribution to the book - and the panel design is simple enough (and, in some cases, faulty enough; the page where the Sentry crashes through multiple walls, it's odd that he doesn't also move left to right on the page as he does so, surely?) that there's the impression that Cho is an artist who worries about his figurework so much that it slows him to a crawl... An impression backed up, in part, by the lack of kineticism of the artwork; it's pretty, but all so damn static.

The lack of energy is felt even moreso because of the lightness of Brian Bendis's script, which obviously was intended as an all-out action blockbuster, with scenes of punching and missile hi-jacking and people shouting. The problem with that is that, when the art fails to convey that energy, there's not enough in the writing to save the book from being dull. Ironically for a Bendis book, a wordier script might've helped things.

The worst thing is, if this book had managed to keep to a monthly schedule, the Eh quality of the issue might not really feel like such a big deal. Sure, it'd be a letdown, but you'd only have another month until everything moved on, and how much can you expect with only four weeks to create a book and so on... We've still got an issue to go before we see how this Ultron storyline finishes, even though New Avengers is already crossing over with the follow-up storyline, and Illuminati is being withheld because MA #6 has to precede it. It's the Civil War delays again, on a smaller scale; when you have Bendis saying on a podcast that "so much" is being held up because this book is so off-schedule, and the book itself is suffering so much because of the delays, and the reason behind the delays, you have to wonder whether the idea that keeping a consistent team for the trade is the thing is really worth screwing up other schedules for.

Tigra would be jealous: Graeme gets brave, and bold, from 10/17.

As the most open fan of all-female wrestling in the world of comic professionals, somehow you just know that George Perez didn't need to have his arm twisted in order to draw THE BRAVE AND THE BOLD #7, which has a high concept straight from Chris Claremont in his prime: Power Girl is possessed and Wonder Woman has to fight her! Thankfully for the readers, Perez manages to stay away from outright exploitation in his artwork, and Mark Waid takes that high concept and uses it to build an exciting, non-pandering, oneshot.

Just as in the previous issues of this series, Waid's writing is pretty much a masterclass in superhero writing. Ignoring the pitch-perfect four-page opening to this issue, which manages to set up the odd-couple character conflict as well as the central mystery for the story without coming across as expositionary-heavy, despite two of those four pages being full-page splashes (and one of them being silent, with the exception of the titles and credits) - a pretty good trick in and of itself - it's impressive to see the way in which Waid uses the action to further character, and vice versa, with the villain conflict acting as a McGuffin for a character study while still being both involving and entertaining in its own right. In addition, both his pace and pitch are perfect; we're thrown in at the start of a battle that doesn't get explained, and the climax of the main story is followed up by Waid winking to the audience through Superman, who more or less admits that these bad guys always come and back and no-one should really think too much about these kind of things anyway.

(He also throws in an unexpected epilogue, bridging to the next issue and tying back to the previous one, suggesting that there might be a grander scheme to these stories than initially suggested. I wonder if that's just a trick to make people keep picking up the book, or whether there's more going on than the readers know about...)

As for Perez, he rises to the occasion - and now I see the possible innuendo in there, which wasn't intended - with work that's restrained in its portrayal of its heroines (Although I wonder how much of that credit can go to the coloring of Tom Smith, who also does a great job) and dynamic in every other respect. Okay, Power Girl's boots have heels, but still. It doesn't stop this being a straight-forwardly enjoyable Very Good book that you hope wannabe superhero creators are reading and learning from.

The Sword is Drawn. And Written: Graeme isn't impressed by this 10/17 book.

After finishing THE SWORD #1, there was something about it that I couldn't quite put my finger on it. At first, I thought that it was something to do with the general feeling of unease I get from the Luna brothers for reasons, I admit, that I can't really explain (It's got something to do with the "girls are weird other" vibe that I got from Girls, I think, but I couldn't tell you what, exactly); it definitely wasn't that the book had particularly impressed me or disappointed me more than I'd expected, because there was nothing about this that was anything more than Eh. But, still, there was something that made the book stick in my head.

And then, out of nowhere, while I was making my disappointing Trader Joe's feta-cheese-and-onion-somekindofpastries snack for lunch, it came to me.

The Sword is a NBC drama.

I'm not sure why I'm so convinced that it'd be an NBC show in particular - It shares the same sense of familiarity and lack of ambition that something like The Bionic Woman does (or even Heroes, for that matter, as much as I enjoy it), true, but there's something more to it that that. You can almost imagine the deep voiceover in the trailer: "What would you do... If you lost everything... But had the chance for revenge? The Sword, Mondays at 8pm on NBC this fall." But there is something uniquely television-budget about that way that it quickly (and somewhat carelessly) sets up a family/domestic dynamic that lacks warmth or individuality but projects enough familiarity for you to buy into it, before introducing a vague and mysterious threat who not only shake up, but destroy, the status quo and give both cheap emotional motivation to the protagonist and an out to lazy writers who didn't want to deal with the ties that would come with having the protagonist's family sticking around.

It's all done well enough, and fast enough, to keep your attention, but there's no heart there, nothing to really care about or engage your brain. It's something that you'd watch - or read - if there's nothing else to do and it's available, but as something for people to pay $2.99 for? I can't see the attraction.