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The Savage Critic: December 4th 2002
By Brian Hibbs and Jeff Lester

Welcome back, my friends, to the show that never ends.  Jeff here, writing this week’s frothy intro.

Slimy and spineless:  that was the mass consensus on the new covers on the Ultimate books when we opened up the boxes (quite late) Wednesday morning. Slimy and spineless.  The damn comics wilt in your hands, and now seem too thin, and make your hands all clammy when you read ‘em.  Maybe Bri and I are wrong about this, but considering the very first customer said, “What’s this?  A comic book or a wet-nap?” I don’t think we are.  Please, Marvel, change these puppies back, or just put regular covers on ‘em, and save the slimy spinelessness for your retailing policies.  Heh, heh. I’m just playing with ya, Marvel.  You know I love you…

And now, on with the funny book reviews!  As usual, my reviews are this color and Hibbs’ reviews are blue

100 BULLETS #40:  Eduardo Risso’s art can’t conceal how lazy this book is getting.  Lono’s some top-notch criminal and he can’t even tell he’s being set up for a fall by getting paid in thousand dollar bills?  Uh, no.  They didn’t even need to be part of a bank heist to bring down the heat on him — not that anyone would have accepted them in the part of town he was hanging out in. This book may have jumped the shark, if you ask me.  Eh.  Oh, and did you notice how the blurb lines for the Bloodrayne video game ad on the back is a haiku?  All of them in this month’s comics are like that, which I found kinda oddly appealing in a super-dorky kind of way. Except for the fact that the phrase “jumped the shark” should never ever be used ever again, I have to agree. The book looks great, but doesn’t seem to have anything to do with it’s own premise any longer. Eh. [Would that all of you could have been in the store to see the protracted argument over the phrase "jumped the shark" that came out of this review.]

ALIAS #17: I just have to say the idea of seeing Ant-Man have sex is only a few steps more appealing than seeing Aunt May have sex. The other funny thing about this storyline is, well, I always assumed that “Jessica Jones” was supposed to be Spider-Woman in the first place (Also a “Jessica”, washed up hero turned PI, etc.), so this might be cake+eating. Still, other than the horrible vision of Ant-Man thrusting heroically into our protagonist (which I am afraid will be burned into my nightmares for some months to come), I can’t help but give this a Very Good. Mmmm…hot Ant-on-Aunt action, there’s an idea.  This issue worked for me, although I’m worried about the seedlings of the “something happened to Jessica and that’s why she’s screwed up” backstory planted here.  I think I always just preferred the idea that she was just screwed up. Still, very good.

BART SIMPSON COMICS #10:  Hey, it’s the Bart Simpson Try-Out Book!  The lead story by James Bates had some good jokes in it, but the storytelling was surprisingly poor both in art and script.  It was better though, than the issue’s final story, which had characters acting out of character, managed to be unfunny and obvious, and belabored the point in only ten pages.  I’m glad there’s a place where some new talent can try to break in, but that’s the only reason I’m not giving this lower than Awful.  Again, I can’t add much to that – this was an exceptionally poor and unfunny comic; about everything you were afraid the comics version of The Simpsons would be. Awful here, too.

BATMAN FAMILY #6 THE TECHNICIAN: Lalalalalalalalala. Don’t care! $5 says no one ever uses any of these characters again.... which, y’know, basically makes the entire series a waste of time and money. On the old and original Savage Critic scale (back in the CompuServe days) there was a rating between “Awful” and “Eh”: “Zzzzzz”. I think I shall resurrect it for this book. Zzzzzz.   One of the highlights of my Savage Critic experience is when Brian remembers another rating he used to have:  “Oh, yeah, I used to have a “zzzz” rating.”  “I had a “duh” rating and am resurrecting it here."  I’d love to see some of these old reviews with their infinite gradations of crankypantsedness.  As for this, I liked the first three pages.  And the villain was kind of interesting, but the corporate crime angle is downright dull.  I can’t believe they’re dragging this story out even more.  Bleah.  The padding makes me give it an Awful.

BATTLE OF THE PLANETS #5: My first issue of this, and I found it pretty to look at but really dull.  Really, really, really dull.  So dull the last page cliffhanger is the team ordering room service, and then falling asleep in front of the TV.  I can’t tell if that’s just laziness or ignorance on the part of the writer, or if this industry is so afflicted with tradeitis nobody actually cares anymore if a reader picks up the next issue or not.  Awful. I “forgot” to read this. Hee hee.

CAPTAIN MARVEL #3: The story-telling is crisper than it was pre-reboot, yes, but I’m finding it... well, basically impossible to like any of the characters in the book. I mean, Rick Jones: Cannibal? Yikes! Eh.  Some truly beautiful coloring, and I dig the new costume, but I don’t like this whole “cosmic awareness gone wrong” storyline: it takes one of the few original traits to CM and fundamentally misunderstands it, I think.  I’ll definitely be picking up next issue, but even more trepidatiously.  Eh.

DETECTIVE COMICS #777: Good, as first issue set-ups go, but I think Brube & Co. are going to suffer by comparison to Loeb & Lee’s similar “every Bat-character including the Kitchen Sink” Hush storyline.  The books have the same editor, couldn’t this have been scheduled a little better? I quite liked the lead, but the backup left me scratching my head and going “Whu-?!” The “Very good” I would have otherwise given this issue gets downgraded to a Good because of the backup.

DOOM PATROL #15: Nice art can only go so far – the directionless nature of this title is starting to drive me batty, and, really, Cliff should be way past “I am a self-loathing freak” by now. Eh.  Yeah, what he said.  Really pretty but so very close to being dead on the page.  Eh.

ELEKTRA #17:  Rucka is too good a writer for me to totally hate this, but on the other hand:  I totally hate this.  I didn’t like the apologist sexy ninja death, I like the sexy ninja death without any sexy ninja death even less.  My only hope is that Rucka’s going with this where I think he’s going.  Eh. I just kept thinking “Wash on. Wash off.” Which led me to a vision of Ralph Macchio with breasts. Ew! Plus, what the fuck is up with the wretched proportions on that cover? You can’t do faux-photo-realism with those kind of fucked up proportions. Anyway, a “kindler, gentler” Elektra is just a second-rate Huntress. Huh, in fact, this is kinda just a replay of that really excellent Huntress/Question mini-series Rucka did a few years ago, isn’t it? I’m the harsher one, so: Awful.

EXILES #20: If half of the issue wasn’t a “recap” of the history of this world, without it being from the POV of the leads, I might have liked this better. Really, in a sliders-type book like this, the interest is either in the reaction of the players to the scenario, or in the dealing with same. But this could have been any group of characters dropped into the same world, and the story would have flowed the same. Sloppy, sez me. So, thus, Awful.  The art and the stories are good enough that only now, twenty issues in, is the totally repetitive nature of the comic starting to wear on me.  “The Exiles have to fight every other superhero on Earth?  Again?” OK.

FUTURAMA COMICS #10:  Thanks to Fox’s scheduling, I lost all interest in Futurama over a year ago, but this seemed like a decent enough adaptation of it.  OK.  Sure, this would have worked as an episode of the series – there was a good density level... but on a practical level, I really don’t care. Eh.

GOTHAM CENTRAL #1: Now this, I liked. The world absolutely and positively doesn’t need another “Batman” title, but if we’re going to have to be given one, this approach works well for me. Very Good. Yeah, I liked this, although it was a little klunky, like they wanted to underline that this book was about both the night shift and the day shift without just saying that so it came out a little confusing.  And Michael Lark’s the perfect artist for the job so I’m hopeful.  Very Good.

GREEN ARROW #19:  Now that they’ve got that moratorium on Ra’s Al Ghul as villain in effect, next on DC’s list is the obligatory “Kyle confronts other hero on why he thinks they’re upset that he’s not Hal” scene.  Other than that, this was good, although the conceit of the narrative is a bit gimmicky and now lacks any real tension.  You can only run on charm for so long. Well, to be fair, it’s fairly impossible to do the first meeting of Kyle and Ollie without doing that scene, but, yes, I agree with you – it’s about as played as played can be, and, as much as it pains me to say it, Kyle’s been GL for nearly a decade now. It’s time to give the kid a break. The storyline in general is starting to make me squirm in my seat – I just want something to happen. Eh.

JLA JSA VIRTUE & VICE HC: It’s a smidge slow to start, and there are a few minor things I would have done to improve story-flow (Big A#1: establishing the Seven Deadly Sins and the Rock of Eternity on the first page or two – for such a major plot point, I don’t think it’s smart to ASSUME that the audience is intimately familiar with Shazam’s origin!; secondarily, I would have probably done more “chapter pages” like the JLA/JSA stories of yore), but otherwise I think this fuckin’ rocked the house in a major way. Big-ass super-hero stories are a hard skill to get right, and I think this really lived up to the format better than anything since JLA: Earth 2. I honestly encourage you to NOT wait for the SC because it kicked a ton of ass. I really like all of the little things – like the ice forming on Superman and tinkling off in the first few pages. Excellent.  You know, I was really opposed to this, just on price-point principle, and not liking Carlos Pacheco’s art much, but Brian told me to give it a shot and I also thought it was excellent.  John’s really nailed that “teams of heroes escaping from an impossible trap” motif that powered the early JLA/JSA team-ups thanks to two other great motifs:  wacky DC pseudo-science and every hero being useful.  Really an impressive achievement.  It did kick a ton of ass—if you don’t like the price, then definitely get the SC when it comes out because it’s worth it.

JUSTICE LEAGUE ADVENTURES #14: Plenty of blah-de-blah about Aquaman, but I still find this more charming than the “real” JLA’s blah-de-blah about Aquaman. What was the most entertaining was that strange stream-of-consciousness insert, which read like it was originally written in Japanese then translated to Croatian, then translated to English for us. While I agree that encouraging kids to be active is a fine goal, if *I* was 10-years old and read that, I think it would have scared me more than encouraged me.  We had a blast in the store today coming up with more “verbs” to do outside – “Smoke!” “Rob!” “Wilding!” – but I think my fav one was the one about running. I’m paraphrasing from memory, but it went something like “Put one foot in front of the other! Some people call it running. But whatever you call it, just do it!” WHATEVER YOU CALL IT? Holy shit! Eh. Yeah, that damned pack-in magazine was terrifying and enthralling—I actually had to explain to Hibbs what the slogan “when you’re out, you’re it!” meant—and I wonder why DC’s committed to a magazine that’ll get kids to do stuff rather than sit inside all day and read comic books.  Do we really need to actively dissuade the few remaining kids from comics?  “Hey kids, comics give you polio! Go outdoors!”

LEGION #14:  I keep swinging in and out on this book just cuz I’m not much of a Legion guy.  But considering I’ve only read two isolated parts of god-knows-how-many, I thought it was pretty good.  Sorry I can’t be more specific.  Good. Yah, I’m liking it fine, too, even if the bit with Squizz Glinko, or whatever the hell the other green chick was named, was telegraphed a mile away. OK.  Oh,yeah, that was what I didn’t like:  Squizz Glinko.  She reveals herself to be a kooky scary zealot and still nobody does anything about her until she unleashes her Lee Press-On-Nails of biotoxin?  Laaaaame.

MARVEL DOUBLE SHOT #2: I found the Doom story to be difficult to read, and rather pointless, and the Bongo-Avengers story to be about exactly what I thought it would be, which was largely obvious and uninteresting. So, a big Eh from me. The Doom story was okay, albeit kinda dull, until it went off the rails in the last two pages.  And the Avengers was cute, but half-baked.  In both cases, Savage Critic Complaint No. 472:  Editors don’t edit anymore.  Eh.

NOBLE CAUSES FAMILY SECRETS #3:  Yet another first issue of a title for me.  Reasonably enjoyable, and the creative team have those soap opera style beats, where the scene ends right before pertinent information is revealed, down pat.  And as much as I thought I wouldn’t like Frost’s back-up story, it did a good job of adding depth to the mythos.  There was something other than the contrived Image Universe tie-in that bothered me, though, and I’m having trouble putting my finger on what it is.  Maybe Brian’ll have a clue.  Good, more or less. Well, for me, it’s that I spend more of my brain power working through “now, who is this supposed to be a analogy for?” than I do living within the story. Plus, basically, I just don’t like soap-opera. Eh for me, I am afraid.

POP GUN WAR #5: It is pretty, it is well designed, the story-telling is growing by leaps and bounds, and it has that elusive “charm”. However... it’s also frivolous and unfocused, and sadly not engaging to this reader. This is going to sound awful, but I think the artist could use a year or two illustrating other people’s scripts, so he can learn a greater through-line on plot. Damn, that’s much meaner than I want to be. OK.  Funny, I thought we’d be split on this one since this was another first issue for me.  Like the illustrative style, but the narrative (which feels like that should be “narrative”) wasn’t really frying my burger.  Lots and lots of potential here, so I hope he hangs in there.  Eh.

R A SALVATORE DEMON WARS TRIAL BY FIRE #1:  I loved the last line of Salvatore’s intro:  “…and most of all, sitting back and listening to the wonderful stories and adventures these talented folks will bring to my home.”  You just know he kept adding the phrase “along with big bags of cash” and then taking it out.  As generic fantasy blabbity-blab, I thought it was a strong Eh, mainly because the cleric withholding healing to those who won’t convert was a nice touch. *shrug* It read like an adaptation of a novel to me... which almost never works in comics because the pacing and structure between the two is so very very different. I also thought the art was atrocious, especially for a CG book. Have to give it an Awful.

ROBOTECH #0: An overwhelming “whatever” from me – not enough of a clear sense of WHO the characters were and what motivates them. Fuck th’ 80s! Awful.  I know I’m not the target audience by a long shot (I never saw any of the original Robotech series) but this couldn’t have meant less to me.  The sloppy storytelling  on the first few pages (giant robots run into what looks like a large empty crater and get ambushed by other giant robots that came from…where, exactly?)  I’ll give it an eh on the assumption that it would have made instant sense if I had watched all eighty-whatever episodes.

SIMPSONS COMICS #76:  All those twelve-year olds who’ve read lots of Shakespeare will pee their pants over this. And I guess I include myself, somehow, in that demographic.  From the Frink version of the St. Swithin’s Day speech of Henry V to the inspired Itchy & Scratchy retelling of Titus Andronicus I thought this was excellent. I thought it veered back and forth between “excellent” and “trying too hard” myself, but the excellent bits were enough to give it a solid Very Good.

STRANGERS IN PARADISE VOL III#54: This is my bipolar comic – I veer wildly back and forth between absolutely loving it, and absolutely hating it, sometimes several times in the course of a single issue. I keep thinking I’m going to drop the book from my own collection, then there will be a 3 page sequence which will convince me to keep it up for at least another issue. A very conflicted OK from me.  I read this book, and now I’m sure I’ll have to buy it because the back cover blacks came off in my hand.  Yuck.  My complaints about Terry’s work haven’t changed.  This had some great scenes and some scenes that were ruined by self-indulgence.  It drives me nuts.  Eh.

SUPERMAN #189:  Seems to be National Great Art/Lousy Story Week, if you ask me.  Some swell art can’t hide the fact that Geoff Johns is either overworked or not nearly as good as I thought he was. And the action scenes in these books are getting too damn perfunctory.  Eh. I thought it was real bad myself – a collection of scenes that didn’t hang together at all (what exactly was the point of the Power Girl scene other than, maybe, “can’t find room for this in JSA anywhere”?), for a story that doesn’t matter at all. Sales at Comix Experience on the super-books are veering dangerously close to single digits... which is really damn sad for SUPERMAN. Awful.

THOR #57: A couple of the pinups were nice, but mostly it was pretty average, and looked like it was done for the check rather than any passion. Awful. Yup.  National Great Art/Lousy Story Week. Awful.

ULTIMATE DAREDEVIL & ELEKTRA #2:  Oy.  At every step of the way Rucka is taking the Daredevil/Elektra story and sanding it down, making it smoother, less absurd-seeming, and infinitely more dull and predictable.  Between this and his work on Elektra, I’m thinking he either doesn’t like the character, doesn’t like the idea behind the character, or doesn’t really understand the idea behind the character.  Awful. “Smooth and dull” is just about precisely right. Add that to the Slimy and Spineless covers of the U line and this is an Awful comic.

ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN #32: For some reason I was unenamored with this issue – maybe because the A story HAD to end that way (and Bendis is usually good about avoiding that kind of thing), and because the MJ bit felt a little forced. It’s like there were 2 or 3 buildup scenes missing somewhere. Or maybe it’s just the slimy and spineless cover. A weak Good.  I disagree about the MJ build-up scene just because you can see her so clearly being cut-off by Peter for the last 12 issues or so.  My problem was there is just no way that if Peter lost his temper like that, even for one second, that that guy would still be alive.  Just no way.  But that’s my only reservation about this. Well, that and the slimy and spineless cover.  Very good.

ULTIMATE WAR #1: What happened to Chris Bachalo?  I remember his art way back on Shade The Changing Man as being open and expressive and powerful.  He’s got a few good panels here, but most of the time he looks like a sketchier Adam Kubert (not a good thing, if you ask me).  The story’s okay, I guess, but I don’t understand why they couldn’t have released it until the proper time in The Ultimates and UXM continuity since Millar’s writing all of it.  It just seemed like he was spoilering himself, which made me not wanna read it.  Eh.  I thought the art was pretty horrendous, actually – it was next-to-impossible in a scene or two to tell who was speaking to whom. There’s no X-Men in this comic, either, which, considering there’s only 3 issues to go, is going to make it a rather short “war”. I don’t feel anyone’s heart is in this at all, and it “feels” like this wasn’t done from organic story points, but because everyone wanted a big bag of money. Well, they’ll get it, certainly, but this was stunningly underwhelming, and coupled with the hype and the slimy and spineless cover, I have to give this significant misstep an Awful.

UNCANNY X-MEN #416: Here come de’ pointy noses! Issue after issue of “nothing happens”, yet Austen’s run is already making me think he might be one of the better X-writers to come down the pipe. Soap without froth, I like it, and am astonished to say “Good”.  I thought it was creepy how many eyes kept disappearing when Asamiya drew people in three-quarters profile.  Brrr.  And it’s OK, but really Austen’s still no Scott Lobdell.

VERTIGO POP LONDON #2:  Hmmm, perhaps it’s because I didn’t read issue #1, but I’m afraid that I find Milligan’s central thesis untenable.  His points about aging are well-made, but the English rock world is exactly the wrong place to make them.  If Rocky is as well known as all that, body falling apart or not, he still wouldn’t want to swap bodies with that young kid.  Do you honestly think that Mick Jagger or Paul McCartney would swap bodies with some pretty kid with potential? They have gotten more action, still get more action, and get far more creative freedom, than up and comers in the pop industry do now.  And they know it.  Add to that thirty to forty years of narcissism reinforced by the masses, and the dirty secret that all celebrities know (which is that the whole thing’s a crap shoot, no matter how good or how pretty you are), and there’s just no way, unless Rocky had been one of those bit players with the contract that screwed them out of moneys and now fly planes or something for a living, they’ll switch places with a young kid.  They’ll honestly believe they’ve got it better.  Frankly, I think it might have been funnier and truer if VPL had been about a young kid trying to switch his way into the body of a Mick Jagger only to find out, hey, what a drag it is gettin’ old.  This is all my long-winded way of saying that despite liking the art, and Milligan’s way with characterization, this was just one long Eh to me. Interesting, and very accurate review there, Jeff. Yet, I still liked it enough to give it a Good.

WOLVERINE NETSUKE #4:  Gotta take a pass because I’ve got issues #1-3 lying around somewhere but still haven’t read ‘em.  Looking mighty pretty, though. It’s pretty, aye, and I’ve read it and found it mostly dull. Still, pretty enough to give it a Good.

XIN LEGEND OF THE MONKEY KING #2: It’s a video game, except without any of the bits that are any fun about video games – like movement, or using your own skill. Awful. Strike one was when they put in a full page for their credits, and a full page reprinting their positive blurbs, but left out any kind of recap.  Strike two was when the dog jumped into the way of the falling staff at the martial arts competition.  Strike three was the page of the action scene (spoken so highly of in the blurbs in strike one) that made no sense. No amount of pretty coloring and Streetfighter II graphics are gonna overcome such preening sloppiness.  See ya, Xin.  I won’t be back.  i.

X-MEN UNLIMITED #39:  I was actually looking forward to this, damn my eyes.  The last couple of issues of XMU had featured at least one okay story, but these were all mighty, mighty lame, so contrived as to be nonsensical.  The Paul Smith art was pretty on the Claremont story (although looking in some places more like Brent Anderson to me), and there’s a hilarious page where Storm literally drowns under the weight of Claremont’s prose, so I guess it gets best of show but sadly, this was crap all around. Heh. Yah, “literally drowns under the weight of Claremont’s prose” I can’t top that, really I can’t! Awful.

YOUNG JUSTICE #52: A funny idea, but a mediocre execution. And that last page sucked the air from my lungs, it was so stoopid. Eh.  Cute but the last page left me pretty cold.  A decent read, though.  Good.

ZERO GIRL FULL CIRCLE #2:  Sam Kieth is this completely bizarro talent, and I’m stunned and pleased he can get published by the mainstream industry, but somehow this sequel is just creeping me out even more than the first one.   No matter how charming it is to read what seems like an Afterschool Special crafted by Georges Bataille, Kieth either can’t understand or can’t show the difference between honesty and emotional blackmail.  Despite the ultra-wonky appeal, I gotta give it an Eh. Whereas I thought it was disturbing enough to be amusing. OK

For Sake of Completeness, here’s a list of all of the OTHER comics that CE got in this week, that I did NOT read (and, therefore, am unlikely to review!). Note, that in most cases this is limited to 1) Manga, which I try to read as it is collected; 2) “Kids” comics like most of the Archies; 3) titles that were subs-only, either by design or accident; 4) Porno [oh, like you need me to REVIEW it!], 5) Things that looked SO bad on the racks that I didn’t bother, and 6) stuff that I’ve assessed before, and I care so little about that I don’t want to waste my time reading anymore. You decide which is which.

21 DOWN #4
A DISTANT SOIL #35
ALICE IN SEXLAND #7 (A)
ARCHIE #530
BIG DADDY DANGER #5
BIG PANTS MOUSE #2
BLOWJOB #4 (A)
CALL OF DUTY THE BROTHERHOOD #6
CODENAME KNOCKOUT #19
EDENS TRAIL #2
FIRST #26
GI JOE FRONTLINE #2
JUGHEAD #148
LAUGH DIGEST #180
LONE WOLF 2100 #5
LOONEY TUNES #97
MYSTIC #31
ONE PLUS ONE #3 
RIPLEYS BELIEVE IT OR NOT HUMAN WONDERS #3
SAVAGE DRAGON #102
SPECTRE #24
SPIDER-GIRL #54
VERONICA #134
WAY OF THE RAT #8

And, for even MORE completeness sake, here’s a list of books, TPBs, GNs, magazines, and other things that CE got this week. I generally haven’t read any of this by the time I post these reviews. Though I generally attempt to give at least one recommendation amongst the TPBs each week, since I HAVE read the material at SOME point.

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN VOL 3 TP
CAGE HC
CITIES OF FANTASTIC INVISIBLEFRONTIER GN
COMIC ART MAGAZINE #1
COMIC BOOK MARKETPLACE #96
DIARY OF A TEENAGE GIRL 
DR JEKYLL & MR HYDE HC GN
FAIR WEATHER HC 
FIRST VOL 3 TP SINISTER MOTIVES
GOD HATES CARTOONS DVD
HEAVY METAL JANUARY 2003
JERRY ROBINSONS ASTRA
JUXTAPOZ JAN FEB 2003
MAD MAGAZINE #425
PSH SERIES I COSMIC BOY AND SATURN GIRL
PSH SERIES I GA GL ALAN SCOTT& SOLOMON GRUNDY
PSH SERIES I GOLDEN AGE DR FATE & THE SPECTRE
RESIDENT EVIL CODE VERONICA BOOK FOUR TP
STAR TREK MAGAZINE #44
STARLOG #306
TOMB RAIDER WITCHBLADE TP TROUBLE SEEKERS
WHERE HATS GO GN
WILL EISNERS SUNDIATA HC
X-FORCE VOL 2 TP

This Week’s TP recommendation is: I’m not really the guy to make the judgment call on this considering I just looked at the stuff as Hibbs was unpacking it.  But I’d give it to Phoebe Gloeckner’s Diary of a Teenage Girl which is a super-chilling prose account with super-chilling cartoons and illustrations attached.  It could be the next huge comix/lit crossover.  I’m looking forward/dreading reading it. I’m super uninterested in comix-slash-prose, so let’s go with something that’s actually comics: Matotti’s Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. Oh. My. God. Usually I can’t stand adaptations, but Matotti is a real fucking genius when it comes to composition, color, and storytelling. Matt Wagner turned me on to him about a decade ago, and I eat up every bit I can get with a spoon. I can’t recommend anything else in this section more then this stunning, and chilling piece of work.

Pick of the Week:  I hate giving it to The Simpsons every other time I co-write this column but it was the only thing that really rocked my balls this week.  Funny stuff.  If you’re not a Shakespeare geek though, I guess you should read either Alias #17 or Ultimate Spider-Man #32 (or Gotham Central #1 or, if you're feeling rich, the JLA/JSA HC) instead. For me it’s the JLA/JSA HC. A superhero wet-dream, and worthy of the format. Excellent job, guys – take a bow!

Pick of the Weak: Either Xin the Monkey King #2 or X-Men Unlimited #39, but considering the Xin guys don’t have the anthology excuse to suck so bad, I gotta give it to them.  Easily the most annoying comic book of the week.  Because I expected so so much more I am forced to give the booby prize to Ultimate War #1. If I was Gene Shalit I’d say “Ultimate BORE is more like it!”. But I’m not, so I won’t. Still, shame on you, SHAME!


  All Material on this page: © 2001-2005 by Comix Experience (except the graphic, which was appropriated from Tales of Suspense #21,
and is probably © Marvel Comics).  Reproduction without permission is expressly forbidden.