The Savage Critic: September
18th, 2002
By Brian
Hibbs
Welcome
back, my friends, to the show that never ends.
I
warn you, I’m grumpy this week. Can’t really say why – might be it was
just a mediocre week of comics, and it might be my standards are just
too high this week. It may also be that I’m back to solo reviews this
week – this is a whole lot less fun without Jeff riding shotgun. It
might also be that my attention span is split because the new TV season
has started (I swear I could actually hear my brain cells dying when
I watched Fastlane), or it could be getting the blackline of
Previews this week and having to pound out the new Onomatopoeia. (December
looks decidedly bleak)
But
I suspect it was the mediocre week of comics.
AMERICAN
CENTURY #18: 22 pages to get to what could have been done in 2, I was
pretty underwhelmed. Eh.
AMERICAN
SPLENDOR UNSUNG HERO#2: Fascinating stuff – I suppose if this actually
had proper distribution it could be a monster hit in the “real” world.
But, sadly, the market has already “made up its mind” about Pekar and
AmSplen. Real shame because this kind of real war story is just what
comics need. Very good.
AUTOMATIC
KAFKA #3: Pretty to look at, and slightly more focused than the first
two issues. There’s not a whole lot of meat on these bones, really,
but I was amused in places. Good.
BATMAN
GOTHAM KNIGHTS #33: If that’s not the stupidest cliffhanger I’ve ever
read in my life, I really don’t know what is. What’s next? Doomsday
is Superman’s maternal grandmother? Awful.
BIRDS
OF PREY #47: Terry Moore first issue, and it reads a bit like SiP
channeled through the DCU. Which, I suppose, is why you hire Terry Moore
to begin with. Wonderfully cartoony art by Amanda Conner – she really
has a remarkable range, doesn’t she? Good.
BLACK
SUN #1: The plot and the writing was strong, but the art was fucking
hideous. Look at the sex scene, which was rendered in such a way to
be as erotic as watching your grandfather bathe. Too damn bad, because
the story has potential. Eh
CAGE
#5: The overdue conclusion which made me feel like the first 4 issues
were a complete waste of 88 pieces of paper. If this was the FIRST issue
you had read, it would have made perfect sense. That’s good for this
issue (Good-good, in fact), but bad for the mini.
CALL
OF DUTY THE WAGON #2: What does this have to do with EMTs? Oh, that’s
right, NOTHING. Awful.
CAPTAIN
MARVEL #1: Your first (alphabetically) “U-Decide” book, and the only
one worth a damn. Nice refocusing of the character, but if you didn’t
like it before, you probably won’t like it now. OK
DAREDEVIL
#37: Bendis does dysfunctional relationships just fine. And I quite
liked this issue, but here is the ne plus ultra of “all middle”. Not
at all worth $3, but will be great in the middle of a $15 TP. Good.
ELEKTRA
#14: Lots of ninja ass-kicking, done in such a way as to not seem as
over-the-top as the super-magic Bendis version. Still, $3 buys you not
very much BUT ninja ass-kicking. Having said that, I think the next
issue could be very interesting. OK
ESTABLISHMENT
#13: Too many ideas, all careening wildly about with no spine behind
them. And so it ends. Eh.
GRENDEL
RED WHITE & BLACK #1: I might have wanted to like this too much.
Loverly art in places, but I actually think Hunter Rose is all tapped
out. Nothing new is added to the mythos, so just buy it for the art.
Good.
HOOD
#5: Another solid issue, even though it didn’t hold many surprises.
This, too, will be a decent TP. OK
INCREDIBLE
HULK #45: It’s got all kinds of critical buzz, but I find Jones’ Hulk
to be plodding, and often illogical. Clearly Bruce ISN’T a face-stealing
murderer, which means someone set him up – what possible reason would
someone go to all this trouble when they could just put a bullet in
his head while he’s sleeping instead? Eh
JLA/HAVEN
ANATHEMA: I suspect we’ll never ever hear from Haven again. What was
this? $6? And for what? A lot of fights? Foo. Awful
JSA
#40: Solid self-contained issue, and I liked the fact that the Doc’s
failed. Good
MARVILLE
#1: The second “U-Decide” book – this one is Jemas’. Now I know Bill
and I don’t get along (he said charitably), so it may well be that you
should discount my opinion, but this was pretty awful. Way too much
time is spent taking cheap and extremely badly written shots at “AOL”.
The shame of it is that there’s a certain pleasure that can be had from
cantankerous grousing. Hell, you’re reading the Savage Critic, aren’t
you? But the key is the jokes need to be FUNNY. Not like I’m succeeding
this week, of course. Anyway, this is incredibly NOT funny, and everything
turns on every character being a big stupid idiot all the way through.
I actually ordered this as my second highest book of this stunt, and
that was a huge mistake. My thinking was that “Mister Outrageous” might
turn in a bravura performance, but, just like that “Bill and Joe’s adventure”
HC, it turns out he really only has 2 points to make. If that. Crap.
MIDNIGHT
MASS #6: Quite liked this one, maybe because it opened with introspection,
and closed with the “monsters” saying “We’re sorry, how can we make
it up?” If this had been the first issue, this wouldn’t have been a
mini-series – it would have been a solid monthly. Good.
PROMETHEA
#22: I don’t understand why they get to show breasts but they have to
say “&%$!” instead of “fuck”. Another solid issue, but I reiterate
my statement of the last few issues that I’m eager to stop with the
Kabblah lessons, and get back to an actual plot. Heh, the new Promethea
and the “magic wand” scene was worth the price of admission though.
Good.
ROBIN
#106: I was really digging the by-play of Batman and Robin, and then
the “action for the kids” intruded. A super-powered carjacker? Yikes.
Good at first, then veering straight into Awful, averages
out to, say, an Eh.
SHANG
CHI MASTER OF KUNG FU #1: Like Howard the Duck before it, this
shows it IS possible to go home again. Very good.
SIMPSONS
COMICS #74: And the funny streak stops. Which is fine, we had, what,
12 in a row? OK
SOJOURN
#15: Starting to get a smidge bored with this now – the art is still
fab, but the plot feels like it is meandering. Probably would have been
better as a mini, than a monthly. OK
SOLDIER
X #3: I read this yesterday, and the only thing that stuck with me was
the recap page (it was pretty funny, yes)... Oh, yah, now I remember,
mutant healing child, and “Are you an angel?” “Yes” Not too shabby,
but the recap page had it right: “I’m really not sure what a ‘Soldier
X’ is.” OK
SPIDER-MAN
PETER PARKER #48: Just like the Robin review, I was grooving
on this until the antagonist came on page, and the whole thing fell
apart like wet toilet paper. Eh
SUPERGIRL
#74: Clearing the decks for the “unnumbered reboot” of next issue. And
it was fine, I suppose, in accomplishing that goal. I suppose. Eh
SUPERMAN
THE MAN OF STEEL #130: Fight fight fight fight. OBVIOUSLY it wasn’t
Luthor. Sheesh. Don’t they know we’ve read comics before? Eh
THING
FREAKSHOW #4: An end that puts everything back exactly as it was at
the beginning. Pretty art, razor thin story. Eh
THUNDERBOLTS
#72: “Stop the world, I want to get off.” No, really. Awful
ULTIMATE
ADVENTURES #1: The third and final “U-Decide” book. Equal parts Batman
and Quantum and Woody. Except Mark Bright drew Marville,
instead. Best thing Zimmerman’s written yet... but there’s not an original
thought in here, it relies absurdly on coincidence in the set-up, and
it’s very out of tone for the rest of the Ultimate “universe”. Eh
ULTIMATE
SPIDER-MAN #27: Way to fuck with Peter, Bendis! Good
UNCANNY
X-MEN #413: I liked it, quite a bit – nice furthering of Morrison’s
school concept, and there’s not a lick of super-heroics anywhere. Robin
and Peter Parker could have learned from this issue. Good.
WEAPON
X #1: The world doesn’t need another X book, especially one as amoral
and just plain icky as this one. Mediocre, at best, though I rate it
Awful
Y
THE LAST MAN #3: I don’t really see why this has such a “buzz” about
it – the setup is pretty clumsy, and the art is mediocre. There’s nothing
wrong with this, but I don’t see all that much to recommend,
either. OK
For Sake
of Completeness, here’s a list of all of the OTHER comics that CE got
in this week, that I did NOT read (and, therefore, am unlikely to review!).
Note, that in most cases this is limited to 1) Manga, which I try to
read as it is collected; 2) “Kids” comics like most of the Archies;
3) titles that were subs-only, either by design or accident; 4) Porno
[oh, like you need me to REVIEW it!], 5) Things that looked SO bad on
the racks that I didn’t bother, and 6) stuff that I’ve assessed before,
and I care so little about that I don’t want to waste my time reading
anymore. You decide which is which.
ARCHIE
AND FRIENDS #62
ARCHIE DOUBLE DIGEST #137
ARKANIUM #1
BATTLE ANGEL ALITA LAST ORDERPART 1 #1
BATTLE OF THE PLANETS #3
BETTY #117
BLADE OF THE IMMORTAL #72
CANNON EXAXXION STAGE TWO #9
CRIME COMICS #1
FLEEP #1
FORT PROPHET OF THE UNEXPLAINED #4
GI JOE #10
HAIRBALL CAL MCDONALD MYSTERY#1
INU YASHA PART 7 #2
MY MONKEYS NAME IS JENNIFER #4
NEGATION #10
ONE PLUS ONE #1
POWERPUFF GIRLS #30
SIGIL #28
SPAWN #119
STAR WARS #45
SUPERPATRIOT AMERICAS FIGHTING FORCE #3
THIRD DEGREE #4
THUNDERCATS #2
TOMB RAIDER #24
VAMPIRELLA #12 REG ED
And, for
even MORE completeness sake, here’s a list of books, TPBs, GNs, magazines,
and other things that CE got this week. I generally haven’t read any
of this by the time I post these reviews. Though I generally attempt
to give at least one recommendation amongst the TPBs each week, since
I HAVE read the material at SOME point.
ABSOLUTE
AUTHORITY VOL 1 OVERSIZED HC
ANIMERICA OCTOBER 2002 VOL 10#10
ASTRO BOY VOL 6
BIZARRE COMIX #3 (A)
COMICS JOURNAL #246
EXPO 2002 ANTHOLOGY
HELLBOY LUNCH BOX #2
INVASION 55 GN
MARVEL VISIONARIES JIM STERANKO TP
MISFIT TOYS 11 PIECE FIGURE &DLX ACTION BUMBLE SET
MISFIT TOYS 12 PIECE FIGURINESET
PROMETHEA AND SOPHIE DELUXE ACTION FIGURE SET
SIGIL VOL 3 TP LIZARD GOD
STARLOG #303
SUPERMAN IN THE FIFTIES TP
TOO MUCH COFFEE MAN LUNCH BOX
TOR VOL 2 HC
WOLVERINE THE BEST THERE IS TP
This
Week’s TP recommendation is:
Of this list one can’t really choose anything else BUT the Absolute
Authority. Nice to see the art in such a large expansive format.
And, while possibly overpriced, it’s not really that bad for what would
otherwise be a TP and a half. I just wish there’d been more “extras”
– maybe even an introduction or something.
However,
I’m going to go a little far afield this week, and give my real and
proper nod to a book that came in the mail as a free sample. Comics
retailers get LOTS of free samples, and 99% of them suck ass. So, I
was very shocked when I read Crab Allan, a nice self-published
book from Down Under. How to describe it? Let’s try Jackie Chan starring
in a Tintin movie. How’s that? You’re not going to find it in your LCS
for a bit (if at all) – it was self-pubbed, and he only printed 500
copies, so even when the “good” stores start getting copies (I’ve 10
on the way), they won’t last long anyway. If you’re a CE customer check
for it next week (I hope), and if not, e-mail craballan@hotmail.com
and tell them you want a copy. Tell ‘em I sent you. It’s only got Aus
and NZ prices on it, so let’s call it $20 post-paid to see the first
work of what could end up being a major major talent. You’ve been warned.
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