The Savage Critic: August 7th, 2002
By Brian
Hibbs
Welcome
back, my friends, to the show that never ends.
Believe
it or not, I’m still recovering from San
Diego
– a show that big really drains things from you that you didn’t even
know could be drained. Or maybe I’m just getting old.
Despite
Jeff’s promises last week (and, hey, didn’t he do a GREAT job flying
solo?), he wasn’t able to do a co-Critic this week. Maybe next week,
we hope.
Let
me get this thing done, then – more new comics are coming out in only
three more days....
100
BULLETS #37: Dizzy is just about the only character I like in 100 Bullets
– while I’m somewhat interested in the whole Minuteman thing, that side
of the story has been so long and dragged out in being revealed, I really
need a single character to focus on to keep my month-to-month interest.
And all of the Dizzy stuff was really keen
in this issue. So... Good
10TH MUSE VOL 2 #1: I’ve
used the “like someone’s Champions campaign” criticism before
(Champions is a super-hero RPG, with just about the greatest
ever rule set for simulating powers and whatnot) – which translates
into non-geek roughly as “This simply isn’t as interesting to the audience
as it is to the author”. 10th Muse is prime
“like someone’s Champions campaign” – it reads like a really
awful 70s comic, with dozens upon dozens of carbon-copy heroes all spouting
painful and stiff dialogue that’d probably sound just fine around a
gaming table. I was a little shocked that Marv
Wolfman did the dialoguing. Yikes, he’s usually
better than this. The covers were pretty amusing, though. Awful.
AGENT
X #1: The Book-formerly-known-as-Deadpool
relaunches here, and I didn’t find it all that compelling.
Possibly because too much time is spent with “is he ‘pool or not”? Here’s
a really good example of wanting to have Jeff doing co-reviews, because
I understand he liked it. Me, I say: Eh
ALIAS
#13: While I think that maybe this is dragging on a little (I think
this could have been more focused as a 2-parter), Bendis
has THE ear for naturalistic dialogue today. I also really like the
“below and around the universe” approach. I just think that, generally,
he needs more of an editorial focus to tighten up his plotting. Still:
Very Good
AUTHORITY
KEV: Clearly this was a two parter, originally
– it would have helped the flow of the story to redialogue
the four middle pages or so to make that a LITTLE less obvious, but
other than that I can’t find any real fault here: it’s Ennis and Fabry
after all! Good
BATTLE
OF THE PLANETS #2: At least in this issue they actually identify the
characters and give them some personality. Still, I don’t care, and
it’s moving into the “not going to bother” pile next issue. Eh
BIG
DADDY DANGER #1: I’m stunned this was approved for NINE issues. I can’t
see how it could sustain the one-joke premise that far. The scripting
is weak, at best, but the art is nice, and I got a few giggles from
some of the conceits of the story (like him removing his mask to have
a slightly different mask underneath), but I can’t say that it was worth
the $2.50 or $2.95 or whatever it was. Eh
CRUSADES
#18: Only two issues to go, but no, I can’t be arsed
to read this any longer. Life is too short for awful comics
DETECTIVE
COMICS #773: Jeff made an interesting point on Friday that Rucka
made the cipher-that-is-Batman work by using Sascha
as our viewpoint character. And each and every time I thought I had
it figured out where he was going with her, he’s spun the table. I hope
she didn’t really die off-camera like that – that’d be a pretty squalid
death for such an interesting character. The back-up story... well,
it was pretty meh, and I think the book would
be better served by dropping the backup altogether, since that’s making
it $2.75 now. What the fuck kind of price is $2.75, anyway? Awkward
pricing drags the total package down to a OK
DOOM
PATROL #11: Nice art (I’ve said that before, haven’t I?), but this meandering
story is starting to drive me nuts. I can’t see it lasting a whole second
year unless a direction and a focus appears PDQ. OK
ELEKTRA
#13: That cover is... well, blech. Elektra,
too, is a cipher, but Rucka hasn’t got me on board yet because the closest we get
to a POV character is the antagonist. I’m firmly convinced that Elektra
just isn’t a character that works as her own book. Eh
EXILES
#16: If this had come six months earlier, I might be more enthusiastic
– but the flashback structure was awkward, and mostly felt like justification
of what Judd wanted to plot, but didn’t fit into the earlier issues,
if that makes sense. Eh
FANTASTIC
FOUR #59: Some nice big crazy ideas, but, not to sound like a broken
record on plotting, ran at least an issue too long, and was packed fulla
filler. OK
GOTHAM
GIRLS #1: Nice animated-style story, though I wonder if it will stand
on its own or end up as a “hey we should exploit
the webtoons” project in the end. OK
HAWKMAN
#6: Way way too much fighting to wade through to get to the nuggets
of characterization. There’s about 8 pages
of story here vamped out to 22. Eh
HIGH
ROADS #5: Broken record broken record broken record. Three issues of
story padded out to six. An editor in San Deigo
was complaining to me that too few creators seem to be able to tell
short stories any more – instead of a tight 22 pages, everyone wants
to do 4 and 5 part stories. What I say is that so few of them are able
to do THAT well. Aren’t editors supposed to curb the excesses of the
creators? Isn’t that sorta the whole point?
Sure needed here. Eh
JLA
DESTINY #3: And... again. Damn it, with a smidge of a rewrite, this could have
made a fine first issue... yet it’s #3, and
these are 48 pages each! Eh
JUSTICE
LEAGUE ADVENTURES #10: FINALLY something not padded. Thank god. Only
problem: it seemed to miss the point of the title by a pretty wide margin,
casting the Manhunter, once again, as the
biggest cipher in the DCU. Also, honest to god, aren’t there enough
DCU characters already that making up new ones for an “adventures” book
is a lousy idea? I mean, this could have easily been Dr. Destiny, y’know? That’s pretty much his MO, anyway... OK
KNIGHTS
OF THE DINNER TABLE #70: I still think this is the funniest gaming book
on the market, but the price went to $3.99 with this issue. Given that
I (and I’m a gamer!) really have NO interest in anything after the comics
section, this now pisses me off. It was one thing when it was “free”,
but if I want to read articles about Hackmaster, then I’d buy “Hackmaster
magazine” or something. Bad bad call, so I
dun it with an Eh
KNIGHTS
OF THE DINNER TABLE ILLUSTRATED #14: I picked this up on a whim this
week – not sure when, but they’ve moved from retelling KODT stories
to doing original ones. Thing is, I don’t like the characters, but,
rather, the players BEHIND the characters, so this is a big dud for
this reader. Awful.
LAB
RATS #5: A clearer example of “phoning it in” probably can not be found.
I’m not going to bother to read the last three issues. Awful.
LOVE
& ROCKETS VOL 2 #5: Jaime and Beto are
both commensurate craftsmen – two of the finest cartoonists walking
the planet. And yet, I really never care much about their content. It’s
too... laconic? Oblique? Drives me nuts because
I know I SHOULD love this. But I don’t. This, I think, is more a reflection
upon me as a reader than anything else, so I give this a mightily conflicted
Very Good
LURID
#1: While calling this a “story” might well be a stretch (“vignette”
is closer to the mark), I really liked it quite a bit. Well drawn (if
clichéd) characters, and a natural set of dialogues. If you never read
it, your life wouldn’t be diminished, and yet, I think of it fairly
fondly as I type this up. So... Good
MARVEL
MANGAVERSE #5: A great big American manga-style
“What if...?” It’s a shame they didn’t position it that way, really.
I think more people’d be reading it. OK
NAUGHTY
BITS #36: The further Roberta gets from Bitchy Bitch, the less I care
– but I love her BB stuff dearly. Good
RISING
STARS #19: Probably will read better in the inevitable collection –
this was all middles. OK
SOLDIER
X #1: The book-formerly-known-as-Cable is also relaunched
in this “There are HOW many x-books?” week. And I was, hand to god,
loving it up until the point where they dragged the time travel and
backstory back into it. In other words, they
had a real chance TO relaunch the book, and
they decided to go with “Cable V2”, instead. Shame, that. Eh
SPECTRE
#20: a sideways “It’s a Wonderful Life” – for such a relatively pedestrian
book, this sure has some of the best covers in the biz, though. OK
SPIDER-MAN
DAREDEVIL #1: God damn, that was some nice
ass art. If Vatche Mavlian can do enough pages
a month, he’ll definitely be an artist to watch – he’s like a cross
between Charlie Vess and Sam Kieth
(well, sure, they’re from similar schools). He has a few things to work
out yet in proportion, but his line work is fab.
The story was fine, though not a lot happened, but the art makes the
$2.99 all worth it. Very good
SUPERMAN
#185: Nice self-contained issue – this really “felt like” Superman to
me. Good
SUPERMAN
ALIENS II GODWAR #2: More like “New Gods/Superman (with some minor Aliens
appearances)”, so your enjoyment will all hinge on whether or not you
like the New Gods. I don’t, really, so... eh
THOR
#52: New continuity implant character, who is interesting enough, but
this issue stopped cold whatever momentum the “Lord Thor” story had
started to get with bringing Asgard to Earth. Eh
THUNDERBOLTS
#69: Wake me when these two storylines are over, alright? Thanks! Eh
THUNDERCATS
#0: I may well have to turn in my “good taste” card, but I have to admit
that I kinda thought this was good. Or, at least, better than any
of the other nostalgia revivals these last few months. What makes it
more terrifying is that I used to ACTIVELY DISLIKE the Thundercats,
whereas I was merely neutral to BotP or Transformers.
Anyway, this did a nice clear focused job of introducing the characters,
milieu, and situation, not assuming that the reader already had an encyclopedic
knowledge of the property. Do you have ANY idea how refreshing that
is? Good
ULTIMATE
SPIDER-MAN #25: What, no “krik”? Poor Peter
(though, actually, I’m surprised they’d go this direction what with
the movie and all that) Very good.
UNCANNY
X-MEN #410: Chuck Austen’s first issue, and already it’s a huge improvement
over Joe. Nice introduction, a clear POV character – I’d have to call
this a success. Ron Garney’s a decent artist, but I don’t think he belongs on
a team book, to be honest. OK
VERTIGO
POP TOKYO #2: At least this issue has a glossary. On the other hand,
I don’t want to flip back and forth. Still, it’s funny and pretty, so
we can overlook the wrong choices in preserving bits of the native language.
Good
WEAPON
X WILD CHILD #1: What the world most certainly doesn’t need is another
X-book. Or a series of five one shots leading into that new X-book.
But if it DID need those things, you could come up with far worse comics
than this one. While a lot of the subtext was pretty disturbing, and
while I’m not sure if redesigning the character to look like Nosferatu
was the call I’d make, this was competent and solid comics. OK
WEAPON
X SAURON #1: On this other hand, this one was a big steamy pile of shit.
If Weapon X is Marvel’s Suicide Squad, then they’ve decided
that Sauron is to be Captain Boomerang. Problem
is, Digger pretty much was always an idiot, whereas Sauron
wasn’t. Gaping and sloppy plotting mistakes (Emma having a “telepathic
illusion” up JUST IN CASE someone attacks her house? What? Doesn’t telepathy
imply conscious and directed usage?), and completely and utterly ignoring
the introductory paragraph on the title page makes me cringe and hurl.
Crap
WEASEL
#5: While it was a good ending to the main story, it sorta
felt like Cooper just got sick of the story he was telling and decided
to wrap it up overnight. Like the end of Clowes’
Velvet Glove, really. Still, Cooper’s great (next week
I guess we’ll get the new Journal with an excellent interview
with him... I’d completely blotted from my memory that he’d worked on
all those Aircel comics), and I can completely
recommend this. Very good.
X-MEN
ICONS CHAMBER #1: Chamber is a very uninteresting character,
and the world doesn’t need any more X-Men mini-series, but Brian Vaughn
surprised the hell out of me by actually making me care about this just
a little bit. Between this and Hood, he’s now big time on my
“Watch this guy” list. OK
ZENDRA
VOL 2 #2: I’d fully recommend this if it wasn’t for the cheescakey
art. Sci-fi and sexiness don’t really mesh for this reader. OK
For Sake
of Completeness, here’s a list of all of the OTHER comics that CE got
in this week, that I did NOT read (and, therefore,
am unlikely to review!). Note, that in most cases this is limited to
1) Manga, which I try to read as it is collected; 2) “Kids” comics like
most of the Archies; 3) titles that were subs-only, either by design
or accident; 4) Porno [oh, like you need me to REVIEW it!], 5) Things
that looked SO bad on the racks that I didn’t bother, and 6) stuff that
I’ve assessed before, and I care so little about that I don’t want to
waste my time reading anymore. You decide which is which.
AKIKO #49
ARCHIE DOUBLE DIGEST #136
BETTY & VERONICA #178
BTVS #47
CHIAROSCURO #4
DECOY #2
LOONEY TUNES #93
LORI LOVECRAFT #2
MEAT CAKE #12
MERIDIAN #26
OH MY GODDESS! PART XII #2
PATH #5
POISON ELVES #70
RUSE #10
SHIDIMA #5
SIN METAL SIRENS #3
SONIC THE HEDGEHOG #113
SPIDER-GIRL #50
VAMPIRELLA #11
VICTORIAN #14
WERESLUT #8
WHERES IT AT SUGAR KAT TP
And, for
even MORE completeness sake, here’s a list of books, TPBs, GNs, magazines,
and other things that CE got this week. I generally haven’t read any
of this by the time I post these reviews. Though I
generally attempt to give at least one recommendation amongst the TPBs
each week, since I HAVE read the material at SOME point.
2000
AD #1298
2000 AD #1299
ACTION FIGURE
NEWS AND TOY REVIEW #118
ANCIENT JOE TP
BLACK HEART BILLY TP
BORIS VALLEJO & JULIE BELLS FANTASY 2003 WALL CALENDAR
CATWOMAN THE DARK END OF THE STREET TP
CHARM SCHOOL VOL 1 TP
FASTNER AND LARSON GALLERY TP
FEMME FATALES VOLUME 11 #9
FORGE #5
FORTEAN TIMES #161
FUTABAKUN CHANGE VOL 6 GN
G FAN #58
HEAVY METAL SEPTEMBER 2002
ILLUSTRATION MAGAZINE #4
JUDGE DREDD CURSED EARTH DLX HC GN
JUDGE DREDD MEGAZINE VOL 4 #13
JUXTAPOZ SEP/OCT 2002
K CHRONICLES TP WHAT A LONG STRANGE STRIP
OH MY GODDESS! LEADER OF THE PACK TP
PANEL DISCUSSION TP
POISON ELVES VOL 8 ROGUES TP
RESIDENT EVIL CODE VERONICA VOL 2 TP
SCARY GODMOTHER GHOULS OUT FOR SUMMER TP
SCREEN POWER THE OFFICIAL JACKIE CHAN MAG VOL 4 #4
SILENT MOBIUS VOL 8 ADVENT TP
SILVER AGE SUPERGIRL AND SUPERBOY DLX ACTION FIGURE SET
SIMPSONS 2003 TRIVIAL BOX CALENDAR
SPARKS URBAN FAIRY TALE GN
SSHHHH GN
STAR WARS INSIDER #61
SUPERMAN OUR WORLDS AT WAR VOL 1 TP
TANK GIRL VOL 2 GN
TOWERS OF BOIS MAURY VOL 1 BABETTE HC
TRANSFORMERS VOL 4 GN MATRIX QUEST
ULTIMATE X-MEN HC VOL 1
VIDEO WATCHDOG #86
WARREN ELLIS BAD WORLD TP
WILD CARDS DEUCES DOWN HC
WOLVERINE DEADPOOL WEAPON X TP
ZACHARY HOLMES CASE 2 THE SORCERER HC
This
Week’s TP recommendation is:
well, the coolest thing this week is probably the Superboy/girl
set – gotta dig those bonus figures of Krypto
and Streaky, plus the look on the character’s faces (“We just had vigorous
sex with each other, and we LOVED it!”) is worth the price. But it’s
not a TP.
So, then, I’m next excited
by the new Wild Cards novel (if you’ve never read them, START
NOW – absolutely my favorite “shared world anthology” series – go to
the library and find book 1 (simply titled “Wild Cards”). You’ll be
very happy you did. I think they ordered the stories wrong (I would
have ended with the Finn story, rather the incredibly weak Topper one),
and there isn’t any Turtle or Trips or Popinjay to be found here, but
still, it’s a new Wild Cards book!! But it’s not a TP either.
I considered, briefly the
Ultimate X-Men HC, but on the reread I’ve decided Kubert
is almost exactly the wrong artist for the story being told, so I think
I’ll give the nod to the epically thick Sparks: An
Urban Fairy Tale TP. It’s charming stuff.
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