The Savage Critic: June
6th 2003
By Brian
Hibbs
Welcome back, my friends, to the show
that never ends...
Behind schedule (Again!) so no real
intro – not if you want to read this before Monday. So, let me jump
in feet first, while reminding you that you can always “tip the reviewer”
by sending a PayPal donation via brian@comixexperience.com....
100 BULLETS #45: When this book goes
bi-monthly, let’s hope it also shifts to single issue stories – can
you imagine trying to read a 4 (?) parter like this one over 8 months?
Solid enough stuff, though I’m still getting confused as to who is what
and why a bit. Very Good.
ACTION COMICS #804: I think pacing
applies here, as well – this type of a “big” story, with changing suns
and betrayals and Zod and whatever the fuck just don’t work as 1 of
3 books, taking 4+ months to tell. I had, since the last issue came
out, completely forgotten EVERYthing about the previous one, and spent
most of this issue saying “who to the what, now?” And once I did figure
out what was happening, I realized I simply could not care less. Awful.
ALIAS #23: “Fuck! Agh! Shit!” I laughed
and I smiled , but it really just went several pages too long. Still,
Good
ARKHAM ASYLUM LIVING HELL #2: The bits
I’m liking are the new inmates – which makes me think this would probably
have worked better as 8-page backups introducing them, while having
less of a “plot” (which kinda is dragging) to unite them all. A weak
Good, but my interest is already flagging and there are 4 more
issues to go.
AUTHORITY VOL 2 #2: Yeah, this is just
a shambling corpse of a comic – just a pale reflection trading solely
on the surface elements of the last incarnation. I suspect my sales
will be down to under 20% of the Millar run by issue #6, and the only
reason we’ll sell any copies is because of the openly out relationship
between Midnighter and Apollo... not because anyone much likes the comic.
Awful.
BATMAN NEVERMORE #3: The gag is wearing
very thin – I found myself mostly skimming this issue looking at the
Guy Davis art, and not much caring otherwise. 2 more to go? Yeee-ikes.
Eh.
BEAR #1: I don’t want to call this
a “rip off” of Johnen Vasquez’s style/sense of humor, but it’s pretty
close. Sadly, it’s also less funny than it thinks it is. Eh.
BLACK PANTHER #60: A few good lines,
a decent idea or two, but I really don’t believe for a second that this
Panther woulda lasted more than 8 seconds in the test. OK
CALL #3: Heh. It’s Chuck Austen Week
here in the comic shop – no less than FOUR books from him this one week.
He currently seems to be Marvel’s “Go-To” guy (Like Zimmerman seemed
like, last year) – and, if anything, he’s bobbling the ball as bad as
Zim did then. Let’s remember that this title started as an attempt to
recognize the heroism and dedication of Firemen, Police Officers and
EMT drivers.... and yet, somehow, this book has become about S.H.I.E.L.D.,
and we’re treated to lovely scenes of cops being slaughtered by the
dozens in a Terminator-style rampage on their police station. This book
isn’t just bad, it is epically atrocious and easily one of the largest
misfires of 2003. Crap.
DETECTIVE COMICS #783: If you haven’t
noticed, the narrative caption has largely vanished from comics – mostly
because it tends to be all tell and no show. So it was a little surprising
to read this – told virtually entirely in caption. The core story idea
was pretty OK, and it wasn’t even done poorly... but I felt at arms
length all the way through because of the captioning. An anemic Eh.
DOOM PATROL #21: I did quite like the
twist of “Huh, guess we won’t fight”, and, you’ve heard this before,
the art is swellegent – but I’m afraid I still don’t care very much
about anyone but Cliff. One issue to go, and if he’s the only one who
survives, that’ll be just fine by me. OK
ELEKTRA #24: Sexy Ninja Death... and
well done SND at that, but again, here we are in issue #2 of SND and
my interest is beginning to flag again. It’s the same quandary I’ve
discussed before: if she’s just an unstoppable elemental killing machine,
then there’s no chance for character development or supporting characters
or anything human at all, really. But if you were to add any of those
things, then she suddenly ceases to be an unstoppable elemental killing
machine which is the only thing there really IS to the character. Garth
sorta solved the similar situation with The Punisher by making
it into a dark comedy, more or less, but even that tactic seems to have
pretty much run it’s course. Elektra is a one-note character, and that
note is being played here better than it has been.... well than anyone
whose initials aren’t “FM” – but that doesn’t disguise the fact there’s
only the one note. So, a reservation-filled Good.
ETERNAL #1: Austen #2. Which may also
be one of the most half-baked ideas of ’03. Personally, and this may
just be me, I think that one should think very very very very hard before
taking characters that were designed to be children’s fiction and making
them into soft-core for adults. I mean, I have to think that Jack Kirby’s
spinning in his grave right now over all of the rape and torture and
talk of “vaginal orifices” in this “Max” version of The Eternals.
I’m really pretty shocked that Marvel is publishing this at all, Mature
Readers or not, because it is simply gratuitous and tasteless. A larger
supporter of Freedom of Expression you will not find, but even I know
that one needs to temper Freedom with Responsibility. I’ve got zero
problems with, say, anal sex with Luke Cage in Alias because
that was actually a moment of characterization rather than prurience.
I just don’t think you can make that defense here where it seems, at
least, that the goal is the prurience itself. Yuck. This left a distinctly
bad taste in my mouth: Crap.
EXILES #28: Austen #3. At least here
it’s just mental rather than offensive. The idea of Havok as an inter-dimensional
back door is completely insane (Maybe this means we’ll get a Man-Thing
to stuff that back door?), but what the hell, right? To me the bigger
problem is flipping this switch in Exiles when he’s (effectively)
the star of Uncanny right now. That, to me, is unfair to the
readership of Uncanny, IF this is actually taking place in the
“real” universe like we were told. A “high” Awful.
HAWKMAN #16: Wow. That was just incomprehensible.
And what’s more insane is that if the goal was just to reintro Byth,
it could have been done so easily with no mentions of hawk-avatars and
whatever. This is, in one of the Jemas-isms I actually like, a comic
book about another comic book. Saved from the Crap only because the
art was really terrific, so: Awful.
HULK THE MOVIE ADAPTATION: It’s totally
not fair because I said the same thing about X2, and I was absolutely
wrong there, but this adaptation makes me think this will be the worst
movie ever. And, wow, Bruce’s dad is the Absorbing Man? Awful.
JSA ALL STARS #2: I liked it fine (especially
the back-up by Loeb and Sale), but what did that have to do with issue #1? Good.
JUSTICE LEAGUE ADVENTURES #20: Pretty
dopey tale. Eh.
LOBO UNBOUND #1: Lobo’s back and it’s
like he was never gone. Reminded me a lot of the “old days”, though
it wasn’t even half as outrageous as, say, the Paramilitary X-Mas
Special. Still, some funny stuff here, and nice art, so, what the
hell, Good.
LURID #3: I’d like to see a bit more
forward movement in the plot rather than so much reliance on Rashomon,
but oddly, since it is quarterly (or whatever it is exactly), it’s much
easier if you approach this as a stand alone issue. Good.
NEW X-MEN #142: Wolverine and Cyclops
hanging out in a strip club and getting drunk. Oddly, not as good as
you might hope that could be in Morrison’s hands. It may be the art
– X-Men tends to work better with more representational styles than
Bachalo’s current one. A weak Good.
QUEEN & COUNTRY #16: Wow. I don’t
know who had more effect on the other, Rucka or Speed, but this was
just terrific. The humanity shone more than the jargon and procedures,
and the art was just breath-taking. Carla Speed McNeil should really
be a superstar artist, with Finder selling as a top 100 book,
so maybe this will bring more attention to her. Best issue of the series,
yet. Excellent.
STARTLING STORIES THING NIGHTFALLS
ON YANCY ST #1: I’m torn. On the one hand Dorkin and Haspiel turn
in a really good job of invoking a Stan and Jack feeling, without being
slavish, yet on the other... eh, it’s the Thing. All Thing stories are
the same: “I’m a freak, nobody loves me” “I love you” “I’m a freak nobody
loves me”. So despite it being a very strong OK on the Critic
scale, I think it’s really a massive waste of potential, and I hope
that everyone got both enough bread, and got that “I’ve always wanted
to do a story about...” nostalgia out of their system so they won’t
do this again.
TRUE STORY SWEAR TO GOD #5: Lost a
bit of it’s charm – probably because our heroes aren’t in the same room
together right now. It was really sweet and charming to watch them fall
in love... but, now that they are in love yet can only talk on the phone,
it’s far less so. OK
ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN #42: That Dracula-ass
accent on Geldof is pretty awful (and slipped up at least once), and
while I think that the debate was very human and nuanced, this kid isn’t....
oh, I don’t know, Spider-Man level material? A strong and solid Good,
which is terribly down for this book.
UNCANNY X-MEN #425: And Austen book
#4. This one I more or less liked. Nice nice art with an absolutely
sledgehammered plot, at least it didn’t feel like left field. Hey, and
what the FUCK is wrong with the editors that they’re putting this out
a WEEK after issue #424? Damn, does no one know how to use a calendar
in the X-offices any longer? OK
USAGI YOJIMBO #66: Stan Sakai is the
man. And this was a top form issue for him. Excellent.
VERTIGO POP BANGKOK #2: Solid issue
– this may be the best of the Pops yet. Very Good.
WAY OF THE RAT #14: Mostly silent issue,
though there was enough density that it didn’t feel like a total waste
of time. Still, I find silent issues to be a waste of money, so only
a Good, for you!
WILDCATS VERSION 3.0 #10: It’s well
done enough, but I don’t really care enough about anyone here (except
Cole) to care much what happens next in the languorous overall plot.
OK.
X-MEN UNLIMITED #48: Two stories that
are the very definition of filler. Eh.
For Sake
of Completeness, here’s a list of all of the OTHER comics that CE got
in this week, that I did NOT read (and, therefore, am unlikely to review!).
Note, that in most cases this is limited to 1) Manga, which I try to
read as it is collected; 2) “Kids” comics like most of the Archies;
3) titles that were subs-only, either by design or accident [this can
include being shorted by Diamond as well]; 4) Porno [oh, like you need
me to REVIEW it!], 5) Things that looked SO bad on the racks that I
didn’t bother, and 6) stuff that I’ve assessed before, and I care so
little about that I don’t want to waste my time reading anymore. You
decide which is which. There’s also the occasional “whoops we forgot
it!” in here as well...
21
DOWN #10
AGENT X #11
ALICE IN SEXLAND EXTREME #2
ALRAUNE #6
BATTLE OF THE PLANETS JASON ONE SHOT
BLACKBURNE COVENANT #3
GI JOE #18
HALO & SPROCKET #4
HARLEY QUINN #33
HEIRS OF ETERNITY #2
JANES WORLD #6
KORE #2
LOONEY TUNES #103
MAD MAGAZINE #431
MIKE HOFFMANS LOST WORLDS OF FANTASY & SCI-FI #1
MYSTIC #37
NIGHTMARES AND FAIRY TALES #5
OH MY GODDESS #98
PARADISE X #11
POPBOT #4
R A SALVATORE DEMON WARS VOL 2 #2
ROBOTECH LOVE AND WAR #1
SABRINA VOL 2 #46
SANDSCAPE #4
SHONEN JUMP VOL 1 #7 JULY 2003
SPIDER-GIRL #61
SPYBOY 13.2 THE MANGA AFFAIR #2
STAR WARS REPUBLIC #54
WARLANDS VOL 3 #6
WOLVERINE SNIKT #2
ZEET #1
And, for
even MORE completeness sake, here’s a list of books, TPBs, GNs, magazines,
and other things that CE got this week. I generally haven’t read any
of this by the time I post these reviews. Though I generally attempt
to give at least one recommendation amongst the TPBs each week, since
I HAVE read the material at SOME point.
2000
AD #1339
2000 AD #1340
AMAZING SPIDER-MAN VOL 4 TP
ANIMATION MAGAZINE JUL 2003
CAPTAIN AMERICA VOL 2 THE EXTREMISTS TP
CHALAND ANTHOLOGY VOL 1 HC
COMIC BOOK LETTERING THE COMICRAFT WAY
COMIC BOOK MAKERS JOE SIMON SC
COMIC BOOK MARKETPLACE #101
FORTEAN TIMES #171
GREEN LANTERN THE ROAD BACK TP
INTRON DEPOT VOL 3 BALLISTICSTP
JUDGE DREDD MEGAZINE #206
JUXTAPOZ JUL AUG 2003
NEW TEEN TITANS THE TERROR OFTRIGON TP
PLANETARY READER
PROPOSITION PLAYER TP
SCI FI ENTERTAINMENT AUG03
SCREEN POWER THE OFFICIAL JACKIE CHAN MAG VOL 5 #2
STARLOG #312
STRANGE KADDISH TALES YOU WONT HEAR FROM BUBBIE GN
STRANGER KADDISH MORE WEIRD BUBBIE TALES GN
SUPERMAN ARCHIVES VOL 6 HC
TOWERS OF NUMAR HC
This Week’s TP recommendation is:
Really jack + shit this week, so not much of a contest: The Planetary
Reader, reprinting issues you’ve probably forgotten that you’ve
read. Also of note is Proposition Player – it’s minor work from
Willingham but it’s still pretty charming in places.
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