The Savage Critic: March
26th 2003
By Brian
Hibbs
Welcome back, my friends, to the show
that never ends.
Damn big week. Let’s see how fast I
can get through this...
AGENT X #9: First book in the pile,
and one of the lousiest. I can see why this is getting cancelled – it
doesn’t have any point, it’s not funny, and the characters are all uninteresting.
Awful.
AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #51: JMS is really
good at the relationship stuff, and he’s pretty good at the Wisecracking
bits (which makes it good that the relationship stuff is sorted out
because Peter can wisecrack more and not mope as much as he has lately),
but his handle on the super-hero side is shaky, at best. Radioactive
gangster conglomerates is an interesting enough idea, but it’s not really
a SPIDER-MAN-type foe. To a certain degree, I think this suffers from
power inflation – Spidey works much better in a “street-level” world.
OK
AQUAMAN SECRET FILES 2003: More like
Vulko Secret Files, really. Which ended up better than it sounds,
but like I’ve mentioned before I’m wholly torn – I find Atlantis-based
stories to be pretty dull, and an ultimately dead-end direction, but
Veitch is doing an admirable enough job of making me over-look that.
OK
AVENGERS #65: Not bad, but I almost
get the sense that Johns’ Avengers run was a negotiating tactic
for that DC exclusive rather than something he burned to do. (ouch,
that’s harsh!) OK
BATMAN #613: Padded and unfocused,
to be sure (Going to the opera in the middle of all of this seems...
wrong), but god-damn does it look fabulous. Good.
CAPTAIN AMERICA #11:
Train-wreck. The left-field Atlantean woman disappears in the middle
of the comic, there’s no pay-off to the last page of the previous issue
(where did those clones go... oh, and as Jeff Lester observed, how cum
the Bucky clones were younger than Cap? Did they wait a few years after
starting the Cap clones to grow those? And why on earth would you WANT
a Bucky clone, anyway? HE didn’t have the super-soldier formula...),
one of the worst appearances by a fellow Avenger (this was, easily,
the worst Thor I’ve ever read... which is saying a lot!) Truly astonishingly
bad, this book has now blown all of the goodwill that the relaunch engendered...
huh, kinda like America itself, when you think about it. Awful.
CAPTAIN AMERICA WHAT PRICE GLORY #4:
Jeff Lester also pointed out something here – this is set in Vegas,
right? So how come there are all of those scenes taking place on a BOAT
in what appears to be an OCEAN? I don’t know how that slipped past me
these last weeks. Plus, y’know, “I switched the bombs” as the solve
to the cliffhanger? Foul! Fab art on a really ripe comic book.... but
fab enough art that I’ll go with OK, rather than the Awful this
would have received with a lesser artist.
CATWOMAN #17: I’m losing interest.
Probably because I’m not as enamored of Slam Bradley as the Brube is.
OK
DANGER GIRL HAWAIIAN PUNCH: If J. Scott
Cambell had drawn this I probably would have liked it – it’s spoofy
and campy and somewhat fun – but Phil Noto’s art, while fab for covers,
is pretty flat on continuity. A solid OK, but it could have been
more.
EXILES #24: The “evil Exiles” (a.k.a.
Weapon X... unfortunately since THAT comic sucks) are more fun that
the “good” ones. Still, and issue needs to come along that really makes
the distinction between the two teams a LOT more clear. Still, I liked
this fine... a very low Good
FANTASTIC FOUR #67: Finally we get
an issue that makes me think Waid isn’t miscast on FF. Not that the
FF are in it at all, but I got a sense that now we’re going some place.
Very Good.
FANTASTIC FOUR UNSTABLE MOLECULES #4:
I quite suspect that if this came out next year, this would be an “Epic”
book. I don’t think we’ll see this type of experimentation in the “real”
Marvel universe for some time. And it wasn’t the most successful experiment,
at that – Reed being off camera for the last two issues made the conclusion
seem shrill, there wasn’t any payoff for the Vapor Girl stuff, and “Ben’s
a bad man because he complains about finger-nail shape” seemed... dunno,
too short-hand or something. A weak OK
GLOBAL FREQUENCY #6: Yuck. This might
have worked in a film (Sorta Die Hard or Run, Lola!), but a comic
page is too static for 22 pages of “chase” to be anything but dull.
Eh
GREEN LANTERN #161: What did that cover
have to do with anything? Judd was nice enough to put a lot of the pieces
back on the board (OA, the Guardians, the Corps, John Stewart, Jade,
etc.) so GL has somewhere to go from here on out, but his heart hasn’t
seemed in the last few issues. Eh
GRRL SCOUTS WORK SUCKS #2: Mahfood
is on the top of his game – this was a great issue. Very Good.
HELLBLAZER #182: I adore Carey’s Lucifer,
but I can’t stand his Hellblazer. I wish I could figure out exactly
why... maybe because his John seems too in control? Dini nailed JC better
in the Zatanna comic down below... Eh
INVINCIBLE #3: This really is a fun
book – I hope they can keep the balance up over the long run, because
this is the one clear success of the “new Image super-hero” line. Good.
JLA #79: I have to admit that I got
a big kick of the “...are you a whore?” line, but I’m afraid that they
find Faith much more interesting than I do at this point. OK
LANSDALE & TRUMANS DEAD FOLKS#1:
Nice to see this pair working together again -- they complement each
other well. Solid work here. Good.
LEGION #18: While it took a slightly
awkward change to Ras (his blood is him? Hrm), I think this may be the
first time that I actually believed a “His power is he’s smarter than
you” villain. That’s a helluva accomplishment after 3 decades of reading
comics! Very Good.
MARVEL UNIVERSE THE END #2: Competently
done, nice art, but I don’t care one lick. Nor a tittle nor a jot. Eh
PARLIAMENT OF JUSTICE #1: Interesting
pay off, but too much murky art to wade through to get there. Would
have been better served by being about 2 bucks cheaper, too. Eh
PETER PARKER SPIDER-MAN #54: OK, this
was pretty amusing... but Wells has really got to lay off making fun
of Spidey-foes as THE source of humor. If they’re all inept, then Spidey
is a putz, y’know? OK
RAWHIDE KID #3: Funny, in places, fab
art, but far too padded to recommend. OK
RISING STARS BRIGHT #2: Basically 2
panels of Rising Stars expanded out to a full comic. About as
appealing as that sounds, too. Eh
SOLUS #1: Perez is such a good artist,
but this was a pretty dull and unappealing comic. I don’t think I’ve
sold a copy except for the preorders... which is SHOCKING for a Perez
comic. I think his fans ONLY want to see him doing characters they already
know and care about. Me too. Eh.
SUPERMAN #191: For “big action” this
was well enough done, but the use of “Stock Comic Book General #6” was
a real turn off. Eh
UNCANNY X-MEN #420: I went from really
liking Austen’s run two issues ago, to really disliking this. Lame baddies,
forced characterization, and wildly inappropriate manga art. Awful
USAGI YOJIMBO #65: A super-charming
issue, I’m going to bump the “usual” Very Good up to an Excellent
for this one.
WEAPON X #7: If you were sad that Cable...er,
I mean Soldier X got cancelled, then he’s here in this. Wow, only took
7 issues to get a protagonist! Awful.
WILDCATS VERSION 3.0 #8: God I’m tired
of writing reviews this week. Four more books to go, too... Anyway,
this was fine, but nothing special. OK
WOLVERINE #188: Logan shows
up for the first time on the last page. There’s not necessarily anything
wrong with that, but this story seems better suited for Punisher
than Wolverine. OK
WONDER WOMAN #190: I can’t believe
“she gets a haircut” actually made it on the news. Of course, the story-NEED
for that really points out how badly this was handled – like 9764524759
people saw her going to that girls house.... Eh.
X-STATIX #9: Damn, that was a good
issue – hit all of the notes perfectly, added some depth and characterization
to the various characters, made cogent commentary on the media and manipulation,
AND even had some super-hero action in it. Excellent.
ZATANNA EVERYDAY MAGIC: And the end
of the alphabet. Hurrah! All the way from A to Z this week. Dini’s
script is wonderful (though probably too many gratuitous uses of the
word “fuck”), and the art was solid enough – and while I would have
preferred this being stapled for $4 than the prestige format it is,
I liked this enough to wish out loud that they’re in talks with Dini
to follow this up with a mini-series or even a new monthly. From my
cold, bitter heart, that’s damn high praise. Excellent.
For Sake
of Completeness, here’s a list of all of the OTHER comics that CE got
in this week, that I did NOT read (and, therefore, am unlikely to review!).
Note, that in most cases this is limited to 1) Manga, which I try to
read as it is collected; 2) “Kids” comics like most of the Archies;
3) titles that were subs-only, either by design or accident [this can
include being shorted by Diamond as well]; 4) Porno [oh, like you need
me to REVIEW it!], 5) Things that looked SO bad on the racks that I
didn’t bother, and 6) stuff that I’ve assessed before, and I care so
little about that I don’t want to waste my time reading anymore. You
decide which is which. Mm, and there’s even a few books where I just
don’t feel like typing up a review
on because there’s too many comics this week!
ARCHIE #534
ARCHIE DIGEST #197
ARKANIUM #5
BATTLE OF THE PLANETS #8
BLACK PANTHER #56
BONDAGE FAIRIES EXTREME #15
BRATH #2
BTVS #55 DAWN & HOOPY THE BEAR
BULLETPROOF MONK TALES OF THEBPM #1
CARTOON CARTOONS #16
CSI CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION#3
DRAGON ARMS #4
DUNGEON #5
KISS RUBI CVR #8
KISSING CHAOS NONSTOP BEAUTY #4
LATEX ALICE #0
LITTLE WHITE MOUSE OPEN SPACE#2
MARK OF CHARON #1
MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE VOL 2SANTALUCIA CVR #1
MERIDIAN #34 KEY ISSUE
ONE PLUS ONE #5
PARADISE X #9
PATH #13
POISON ELVES #72
PUBO #3
RESISTANCE #7
RUSE #18
SAMMY TOURIST TRAP #2
SIMPSONS COMICS #80
STRANGERS #1
TAROT WITCH OF THE BLACK ROSE#19
TEENAGERS FROM MARS #5
TERRY MOORES PARADISE TOO #12
THREE DAYS IN EUROPE #4
TOMB RAIDER #28
TOMB RAIDER JOURNEYS #11
VERONICA #138
WARLANDS VOL 3 #4
X-TREME X-MEN #23
And, for
even MORE completeness sake, here’s a list of books, TPBs, GNs, magazines,
and other things that CE got this week. I generally haven’t read any
of this by the time I post these reviews. Though I generally attempt
to give at least one recommendation amongst the TPBs each week, since
I HAVE read the material at SOME point.
2000 AD #1327
2000 AD #1328
ARIA VOL 2 THE SOULMARKET HC
ASTRO BOY VOL 13 TP
AVENGERS LEGENDS VOL 2 THE KORVAC SAGA TP
BTVS NOTE FROM THE UNDERGROUND TP
CINEFANTASTIQUE VOLUME 35 #2
CINEFEX #93
CITY LIGHTS IGORT TP
COMICS SPOTLIGHT MAGAZINE #4
DAREDEVIL VOL 1 HC
DISAPPEARER ANDREA BRUNO TP
EDDY TABLE FIGURE
FORTEAN TIMES #168
GRAPHIC CLASSICS VOL 5 JACK LONDON
JADE SCREEN VOL 1 #3
JUDGE ANDERSON HOUR OF THE WOLF GN
JUDGE DREDD MEGAZINE #203
JUSTICE LEAGUE ADVENTURES TP
KISS COMIX #133
LUNA LEILA MARZOCCHI TP
LUPIN III VOL 3 GN
MARVEL ENCYCLOPEDIA VOL 2 X-MEN HC
NOTTE PUTRESCENTE SUEHIRO MARUO TP
PREVIEWS VOL XIII #4
RIPD TP
SANCTUM VOL 2 HC DISCOVERY
SKETCH STEFANO RICCI TP
STAR WARS A LONG TIME AGO VOL4 SCREAMS IN THE VOID TP
TONY MILLIONAIRES DRINKY CROWCOASTER SET
TOP TEN BOOK TWO TP
ULTIMATE X-MEN VOL 5 ULTIMATEWAR TP
WAITING FOR FOOD CRUMB PLACEMAT DRAWINGS VOL 3 HC
WEAPON X VOL 1 TP
WIZARD COMICS MAGAZINE #140
X-MEN 2 THE MOVIE TP
This Week’s TP recommendation
is: No contest this week:
Top Ten v2 TP. I really really hope they can do
“season 2” of this excellent book.
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