The Savage Critic: January 9th, 2002 By Brian Hibbs

Welcome back, my friends, to the show that never ends.

Miss me? Having the last three weeks off from reviewing was kinda heavenly, all things considered. I had a splendid time in NYC, though I don’t see how human beings can intentionally live in below freezing weather. I’m just a spoiled Californian these days, I guess.

Anyway, not much time for a rambling preamble this week, let’s go short and sweet..

ADVENTURES OF SUPERMAN #600: If that’s not the ugliest Superman cover in... well forever... I have no idea what is. SuperLeno. Sheesh. Content-wise... well, the idea was alright enough I guess (though "nano-tech" is become a lazy writer’s tool), but I think it points towards one of the central failings of the Super-line these days: they just have no idea what to do with Lex. "President Lex" is an interesting enough idea, I suppose, but unless you GO somewhere with it, then what the hell is the point? Eh.

ALAN MOORES GLORY #1: Moore does to Wonder Woman what Supreme was to Superman. It is almost a shame that Liefeld proved to be such a fuckup that we lost both books as ongoings... but, then, I suppose that was what allowed the ABC to be born. Avatar is a pretty filthy company, what with the gross house ads at the back, and the 7 different covers on this, and any editor that allows a colorist to put red letters on a yellow background should be taken out back and shot, but Moore is such a fine writer that it's easy to look past that all. Very Good.

AMAZING SPIDER-MAN #37: Veering dangerously close to After School Special territory. Landing there, even, for a minute or two. But JMS is still a fine writer, and he pulled it out of the maudlin range enough for me to give this a thumb’s up. I’m quite looking forward to Peter and May’s talk (though making us wait this long for it is dirty pool), but don’t we still have a ‘nuff Said? Issue due? That’d suck. Good.

AVENGERS CELESTIAL QUEST #5: Ow. Sucktastic. Awful

BATGIRL #24: The alphabet screws up reviewing the Murderer? storyline in order. This was reasonably superfluous to that story, and next month we move on to the Shiva thing. The bat-office is turning out decent hero stuff, but I’m growing itchy enough that I’d like the Bat-family to actually get back together again, rather than this "everyone hates each other" stuff we’ve been seeing the last year. Anyway, Batgirl hides around and through this week’s issue of Detective, and no new information is given. Well-done, in and of itself, but a waste of $2.50 as a story itself, or even a portion of the biger storyline. Eh.

BATMAN LEGENDS OF THE DARK KNIGHT #151: At least one chapter too long. Stupidly plot-convenient use of hallucinogens. Dumb pair of villains, and no surprise on the "twist" given this issue. Awful.

BLACK PANTHER #40: Blah resolution to a blah storyline. Back to intrigue next month, so here’s hoping. Eh.

CABLE #101: Too many characters making too many real-world points, and seemingly no direct connection to one another. Eh.

DEADMAN #2: Astonishingly bad. I can’t begin to imagine this lasting a full year, thanks to the head-start on the downwards plunge that Dead Again brought. Crap.

DETECTIVE COMICS #766: Part one of Murderer? And it’s a pretty good police procedural. Which, y’know, is what a book called "Detective" should be. Still, I wonder how the cops can be crawling all over Wayne Manor and not find ANY trace of Batman or the cave. I really hope that it turns out that a WAYNE enemy is behind this, rather than some super-villain, though. Good.

FANTASTIC FOUR #51: Reads like a fill-in issue. Eh.

FELON #2: Solid book, but the lack of likable characters makes it a bit pointless. OK

FURY #5: Lalalalalala. Marking time. Sub-par Garth stuff. OK.

GI JOE #3: Huh? Never an 80s Joe fan, so whatever charm this could possibly have is utterly wasted on me. This goes into the "I won’t bother to read it pile" as of next issue. Awful.

GREEN LANTERN #146: Interesting enough twist on the Phoenix story, I guess, but I can’t for the life of me see how this could possibly end up in a satisfying manner. Eh.

HARLEY QUINN #16: Weird story structure, jarring art changes that didn’t work. This books reads like it was plotted under the influence of hash brownies. Sounds funny enough on paper, but the execution just escapes them. Eh.

IRON MAN #50: Mike Grell’s first issue, and just about what I expected in terms of "real world" intrigue. It will be interesting if he tries to keep Tony out of the suit for most of his run, because powers aren’t really Grell’s forte. Totally and completely over-played "protagonist falls in love with doomed freedom fighter" plot, though. And what’s up with him taking off the mask in front of hundreds of witnesses? OK

JUSTICE LEAGUE ADVENTURES #3: Sure, fine, whatever. Eh.

KINDRED #1: How many months/ years has this been sitting at the bottom of the drawer? Not long enough. Harkens back to the days when you couldn’t tell the difference between Liefeld and Lee’s WFH hero universes. Crap.

MOMENT OF SILENCE: Wonderful and heartfelt book, that succeeds despite its storytelling conceit of silence. Bill Jemas’ story was absolutely the strongest of the batch... which is almost weird since he has the least writing experience. Only one thing marred the package for me: and that was the superhero pinups right at the end. Yuck. Otherwise, for both content and intent, Excellent.

NIGHTWING #65: Part 3 of Murderer? And, sure, it is adequate. Really points up the need to get Dick the hell out of the cops, though. OK.

POWER COMPANY WITCHFIRE: As a single story, it works well enough, but as a fifth week "stunt" it is going to end up with PC debuting flat on its ass. There’s nothing here at all that says "Hey, buy the monthly!" except maybe the character notes stuff at the end. Eh.

SANDMAN PRESENTS THE THESSALIAD #1: Disorientating narrative voice, and a real huh-I-ran-out-of-pages ending. Still, I liked it despite itself. OK.

SAVAGE DRAGON #92: Another adequate issue. OK.

STRANGERS IN PARADISE VOL III#46: And here I was hoping we could forget about "Molly and Poo" forever. SiP really feels directionless these days to me... OK

SUICIDE SQUAD #5: Probably coming too late to find its audience, this was a really funny issue. Woulda worked just fine as a one-act play. Crisp dialogue, and a nice, if obvious, twist at the end. Plus I just like Deadshot, even if the suicidal attribute given to him has never really been handled well at all. Good.

THOR #45: I hate Asgard. Even when Jack did Asgard stories, I didn’t care. Like GL, how can this end in a satisfying manner? Awful.

TRANSMETROPOLITAN #52: A couple of very funny lines, and some plot movement has got me perked up again by this book. Good.

For Sake of Completeness, here’s a list of all of the OTHER comics that CE got in this week, that I did NOT read (and, therefore, am unlikely to review!). Note, that in most cases this is limited to 1) Manga, which I try to read as it is collected; 2) "Kids" comics like most of the Archies; 3) titles that were subs-only, either by design or accident; 4) Porno [oh, like you need me to REVIEW it!], 5) Things that looked SO bad on the racks that I didn’t bother, and 6) stuff that I’ve assessed before, and I care so little about that I don’t want to waste my time reading anymore.

ARCHIE DOUBLE DIGEST #131
AZRAEL AGENT OF THE BAT #86
BETTY #108
CREED UTOPIATE #1
HELDEN #4
INDUSTRIACIDE #1
KNIGHTS OF THE DINNER TABLE HACKMASTERS #11
MYSTIC #20
NIGHTHUNTER #1
RANMA 1/2 PART 10 #10
SAURIANS UNNATURAL SELECTION #1
SCOOBY-DOO #56
SEXY SYMPHONY #5
STAR WARS STARFIGHTER CROSSBONES #1
TWO OVER TEN #3

And, for even MORE completeness sake, here’s a list of books, TPBs, GNs, and magazines that CE got this week. I generally haven’t read any of this by the time I post these reviews. Though I generally attempt to give at least one recommendation amongst the TPBs each week, since I HAVE read the material at SOME point.

9-11 EMERGENCY RELIEF GN
ALTER EGO #12
BLUNTMAN AND CHRONIC GN
COMIC BOOK ARTIST #16
GREEN ARROW STATUE
GRIN AND BARE IT #3 MAGAZINE
HAMMER OF THE MIGHTY THOR
MANGA TECHNIQUES VOL 1 DRAWING MANGA FOR BEGINNERS
PULP VOL 6 #2
REDMOON GN #4
SARAI VOL 1 #6
SKETCH MAGAZINE #12
STAR TREK MAGAZINE #34
THWAK #1
US WAR MACHINE TP
WILD 7 GN #1

This Week’s TPB recommendation is: Actually, I probably shoulda moved Bluntman and Chronic to the comics section, because its not a TPB. Funny, in a single-minded and blatantly crude and derivative way. It woulda won the category in a normal week, but 9-11 Emergency Relief came out this week too, and that’s just the superlative package.

Average Rating for the Week: A meager 28 books "reviewed" for an average rating of 3.50 (out of a possible 7.00). Middle of the road, exactly!

Pick of the Week: A Moment of Silence. Excellent job, everyone!

Pick of the Weak: Put a fork in it: Deadman #2. Shame on you!